Bad Date Bingo

Been on a string of bad dates lately? Did he check out other women during the date? Talk about himself too much? Make you plan the date?

Take heart – even if you weren’t able to score on your date, you could still be a winner with Schmitten Kitten’s Bad Date Bingo!

I can guarantee you this: for all you complain about dating, as a veteran of 300 dates over 10 years, I can pretty much match any of you, bad story for bad story. In retrospect, you’ll see that none of it means anything and the quicker you can laugh at the bad dates and put yourself back out there, the quicker you’ll find a love that lasts. Just last night my wife was telling me that she loves my bad date stories (this one was about me paying for a nice sushi dinner, not getting a “thank you” at the end of the night, and then giving oral sex without receiving any in return. Ah, how I loved being single!)

Anyway, take a look at the card here and share your WORST date below…

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Comments:

  1. 1
    my honest answer

    If you only give it to receive it Evan, it’s no wonder she didn’t oblige you!

  2. 3
    MAXINE

    OMG! Where do I begin. Wow! Had the worst date of my life. First he could not decide which club he wanted to go to. So we drove around endlessly until he found one he liked. Then he wanted to show off his dance steps. I did my best to keep up – my hair was a mess by the time the song was over! Then he talked all night about how fabulous he was and how lucky I was that he wanted to date me. At the end of the date, he decided that I would make a good wife for him. Yes, I ran as fast as I could from this very strange man.

  3. 4
    P.

    Brought me to his car to smoke (I don’t smoke, so it was really obnoxious being enclosed in his car), then said “Would you like to see it,” while reaching for his belt buckle.

  4. 5
    pd

    To U, you lasted a whole hour with the 250lb chick????

    I lasted a whole 25 minutes with my last date and just got up and fled (I think I was polite) as I’d had enough.
    He hadn’t bothered re-reading my profile to check up on my likes/interests/wants before the date (I do this so I don’t put my foot in it!).
    He had no clue, whined incessantly about all the lousy women on match, made too many references about one night stands and sex, had a sneery, leery grin and gave every poor woman who walked by the once over to their embarassment, the young girl with the baby in a pram wasn’t impressed. He gave the same leer to a lady with a walking frame and that was the end for me, I was gone!
    I won’t mention the clothes – dude!

  5. 7
    Ellen

    TMI Evan!

  6. 8
    Zann

    The man had no teeth… false or otherwise.  Need anything more be said?

  7. 9
    Ruby

    U #2

    Ugh. Are we supposed to feel sorry for you for having “pity” sex with a fat woman? Sounds like a bad date of your own making.

  8. 10
    Nicole

    @Ruby…I know.  I read that link too and he just sounded angry that the hideous fat chick threw him out on the street where he belonged, when he supposedly was praying for an exit all night.
    The post was so insulting so it was funny that he wound up getting humiliated himself, and he sounds like a square on someone else’s bingo card.  
    Sorry for the schadenfreude but that post was not anything that would make the writer sound like someone we should sympathize with ever.
    Funny how he couldn’t handle being the “dumpee” of a “pig.” 

  9. 11
    Gem

    The man was so nervous he trembled. It was un-nerving and made me very uncomfortable because I had to pretent that I didn’t see it. He could barely speak and gave me one to two word answers to my questions. His lips even trembled when he spoke.

    He asked me nothing except to turn a few of my questions back to me. Finally, I gave up trying to engage him and just began telling him stories of my life. Nothing serious, mostly funny  to entertain myself and attempt to crack his phobic shell with laughter. Didn’t really work.

    I inhaled my lunch in three bites wanting the end the pain. His and mine.

    He was so socially awkward and inept I couldn’t believe it. I have never experienced someone like that.

  10. 12
    sarahrahrah!

    After trying to get published in another lifetime, I caught the attention of a newspaper columnist who was a bit of a local celebrity.   Initially, I was flattered.  We met at a diner cafe (think Denny’s) and he proceeded to tell me how great he was.  Over my Breakfast Sampler, I also found out that he really wanted to have fun and that his long-term girlfriend of several years had given birth to his son six month ago.  And how she supported him in his lavish lifestyle that a newspaper columnist could not afford (my inference) and how she didn’t care that he went out with other people, etc., etc.  (Oh, really???)  And how I had such wonderful eyes, had anyone ever told me that? 
    As for me, I  had some fun asking this guy pointed questions, seeing if he actually had a conscience.   I drew the conclusion that one can be a fantastic writer, but a really bad life partner.  (And no, Evan, this isn’t a veiled or unveiled reference to you!)
     
     
     

  11. 13
    Goldie

    Dude looked nothing like his pictures. For our first date, he gave me three options: 1)walk our dogs together, “but I need to warn you that all of my dogs have fleas”; 2)coffee or drinks; 3)grocery shopping, “because I need it done and I despise grocery shopping”. I passed on Option 1, and proposed 3, followed by 2. He asks where I want to meet, since we live 40 miles apart. Silly me said “let’s meet halfway”. He got on Googlemaps and found a store that was exactly 20 miles from both our houses… in a horrible neigborhood… and he was ten minutes late, as he was cruising the area trying to find the store. I stood in front of a discount grocery store in a bad area for ten minutes, all dressed up, getting stares. After we got done with our shopping, we went looking for a place where we could have our drinks or coffee. He didn’t have one in mind, and neither of us knew the area. We cruised around in his car looking for a bar, found one, but it looked so scary that we didn’t even stop, and went back to the grocery store parking lot instead. He asked if he could smoke, I said okay, he proceeded to chain smoke five cigarettes. Eventually the smoke gave me a migraine, so I went home. He emailed me saying, “I had a hard time reading whether you want to meet again” this man has a PhD in Psychology. This is the worst I have so far — I realize it’s pretty mellow, so I guess I’ve been lucky (and selective).

  12. 14
    Jesse

    EMK: I think your sushi date was full of feminine energy. Very receptive and not a doer. :)

  13. 15
    Laura

    I think U’s post was supposed to be humorous, and I doubt that the date even really happened in real life. I thought it was pretty funny, but yes, offensive and insulting to women. But I still laughed out loud.
    I’ve had a lot of worst first dates.
    -The attorney who told me he was an exhibitionist on the first date.
    -The guy who can’t resentfully stop talking about his ex. (this happens way too often!)
    -The guy who had a skin condition who kept trying to touch me even though I squirmed away and then sent me a very critical message afterward about how there needs to be more touching in the future, and more eye contact on my part.
    -Guys who talk about their value as future husbands and what they are looking for in a wife. Similar to guys who talk about their exes on first dates, this violation of first date etiquette happens way too often.
    I don’t knock a guy for being nervous at first. I think it’s kind of cute when they’re shy, and it makes me think they’re more sincere for some reason. I’m a bit socially awkward at first, so I totally get it. First dates always feel like a job interview anyway, so if I see any potential at all, I usually give them another chance.

  14. 16
    Steve

    Here’s a random set, none really bad (because I am a positive person), but in retrospect, the dates didn’t show much in
    1) We meet and she instantly reaches out to shake hands. It was done in such a formal and impersonal way. Ive had this happen a few times, and in every experience experience, this always signals that she is closed to the possibilities of a date. Examples: With woman #1, we have ice cream, walk around the neighbourhood and she shakes hands as we depart. With woman #2, she asks me to take her to a wine bar and picks the most expensive one in the neighbourhood. We chat, I pick up the bill, and she shakes hands as we depart. Woman #1 emails me afterward and says she’s busy for the next few months. Woman #2 doesn’t even respond to my follow-up email. Is that a “quick fade” and/or just rude? In both of those, they are still on-line now, 6 months later.
    2) She texts me the morning of date asking to reschedule for 2 hours later. She still shows up 15 minutes late. We walk around an outdoor art exhibit (my suggestion as she is into the arts). When we finish, I suggest we grab a drink (coffee or beer). She suggests lunch instead, as she hasn’t eaten yet. I oblige.  Halfway towards the restaurant, she wants to go see an art exhibit at the art gallery after lunch. I say sure, to go with the flow. After lunch, she has no money, so I pay. Then as we go towards the art gallery, she tells me she is not interested in me romantically, but can see me as a friend. She said she didn’t feel any chemistry and that I did not sound excited about her projects when she told them to me back at the outdoor exhibit. I am stunned. When we are at the gallery, as she pays for her ticket (with her credit card), she asks if I am sure I’d like to join her. I guess she can see that I am a bit speechless. I said, I think I’m going to go, and I left. I’ve never done that before, but I’m glad I did.

  15. 17
    Goldie

    I call Comment Of The Day on #14! :D :D

  16. 18
    Erinlee

    I once went out on a date with a man who was much wealthier than I.  Most of the date was tolerable, but it was obvious we didn’t have much in common.  What completely me turned me off was his comment when he saw a woman on the street with her children.  She was not gifted with the best of looks, to say the least.  He says to me, “some people shouldn’t be allowed to breed”.  Ugh, are you really that full of yourself?!  I drove that night, and we sat in the parking lot as I was to drop him off at his car.  Neither of us were going to ask for a second date and I’ve never had a man get out of my car more quickly then that night.  Guess I wasn’t ‘good enough’ or ‘high class’ enough for him, not that I would have wanted to be, geesh!  Thankfully our paths never crossed again.

  17. 19
    david

    Hmmm — off the top of my head
    – The girl who with the slightly deceiving pictures (who smoked, a 180 from her profile) who brought me to a dinner party full of cyber-punks. The host tried to force feed me garlic baked squash as a laugh.
    – The woman who was in her 50’s who looked much, much worse than her pictures and who scolded me about looking at my watch during a very casual meet up at a Venice street fair. I remember being back at my apt within the hour.
    – the girl who was so socially awkward and weird, I felt like every fiver of my body felt like it was going through a black hole made of shards of glass. When I asked her if people called her “quirky” she said, “Yeah, that and weird.”
    – Woman who came over for a “booty call” (our first), came by looking a wreck and when I went to get her a glass of wine said, ‘is that the wine you have to get girls drunk with?” “Ummm, no it’s the wine I cook with.” I understood how a woman’s libido can take a nose dive the minute a guy says something stupid — I felt it myself, in my body.  

  18. 20
    Abir

    Hahahaha, nice picture. But this is reality. There are many men who doesn’t have the guts to impress a single woman. Only one reason I can mention here that they are mostly shy or anxious about what they will or would do in certain situation. So, I am gonna share a video where I got at the first place as I was a really super shy guy. But look at me now! I’m commenting with confidence, So guys MAN-UP and Learn how to overcome approach anxiety, how to start a conversation, how to develop the conversation, how to build trust, how to create attraction and how to get her number easily and without nerves.
    Best of Luck,
    Abir

  19. 21
    Clare

    I went on a date with a guy whose profile picture I discovered when I met him was *very* flattering. He insisted we go out somewhere close to his house so he could walk there because he didn’t have a car, even though it was a long way for me to drive. At 33, he still lived with his mother and was a student who, even though he only studied 7 months of the year, didn’t feel like getting a job. But, that was ok, he assured me, he wouldn’t expect me to “pay for everything”. He did however expect me to spring for my own drink.

    Despite all of this he seemed to think he had a lot going for him and spoke arrogantly of his superior intelligence and opinions, and how stupid other people were.

    He seemed to think that the date had gone rather well, however, and texted me later in the week to suggest that we “Skype”. Be still, my beating heart.

    :D

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