Don’t Judge a Book By Its Cover – In Defense of “Marry Him: The Case for Settling for Mr. Good Enough” by Lori Gottlieb
The funny thing is, despite all the misguided attacks on Gottlieb, Gottlieb’s book doesn’t emphasize her opinion, per se. Like a sociologist trying to discern the truth, she has interviewed dozens of the country’s most respected experts in putting together “Marry Him.”Gottlieb is a well-regarded journalist who has compiled the collective wisdom of psychologists, researchers, scientists, couple therapists, matchmakers, dating coaches, professors, clergy and married people, all filtered through the prism of this universal question: Why hasn’t an incredible catch like me found a husband? If you have asked yourself that very question, you need to pick up this book. However, in case you’re still skeptical, I’ve compiled a list of misconceptions that you probably have about “Marry Him”, along with the truth about the contents of the book: Issue #1 with “Marry Him“ “I will NOT settle on anyone. I would rather be alone than to settle!”
All she says is that if you’re holding out for a “10″in each area, you may find that you’ve missed the boat,and that the men available to you later on may even be MORE of a compromise.
Gottlieb completely agrees with you! Yes, the word in the book title is “settle.”However, it’s the wrong word to describe what the author means, and is probably a conscious decision by the publisher to provoke debate. The real word that Gottlieb means is “compromise”(which you will see when you read the book). And I think we can all agree that people who refuse to compromise in relationships will have a hard time forging a long-term partnership. At NO point does Gottlieb conclude that you should go your entire life without attraction, humor, and intellectual stimulation. All she says is that if you’re holding out for a “10″in each area, you may find that you’ve missed the boat,and that the men available to you later on may even be MORE of a compromise. This is why she wrote “Marry Him.”Her hope was to help smart, strong, successful women avoid falling into the same exact trap as she did: always going after a certain “type,”always putting butterflies above compatibility instead of looking for a healthy balance of both, believing that there’s always a better dating option around the corner, not fully understanding what marriage is truly about, etc. Frankly, I’m not sure what there is to disagree with.
Why He Disappeared is the smart, strong, successful woman's guide to understanding men. If you want to learn how men think, and rediscover how to have meaningful relationships - all from a man's point of view - click here to learn Why He Disappeared.
Do You Want to Attract the Partner of Your Dreams?
If so, sign up for my free dating and relationship newsletter and receive my free eBook, The 5 Massive Mistakes You're Making In Your Love Life - And How to Turn Them Around Instantly. Simple and effective advice to jumpstart your love life.