How do you keep the kiss from turning into a crazy passionate makeout session?

I’m a passionate person and the guys I date seem to have a lot of gusto.

Evan’s haircut makes him look like Rufus Sewell.

“If a man wants to be kissed and you don’t kiss her he will assume you don’t like him. He will usually not say anything. You will have missed out.

Missed out on what? The first kiss is still to come. Even if he thinks she’s just not that into me in the moment, when you call for another date, if she likes you, she will be happy to be proven wrong.
Then you both still have the kiss to look forward to. It may even be better because you will have had more time spent getting to know each other and for chemistry to grow.”

- Huh??? A couple of points. If she likes you, she SHOULD kiss you. I think most guys don’t mind a bit of coyness, but not even a kiss? What is this, 1875? As the pursuer in this scenario, a kiss or the kiss is how you know hings are moving forward. No kiss, no pursuit. And if you’re gonna make me work that hard for a bloody kiss….

- I’d rather spend my efforts where I know there is chemistry and she wants to show it too. There are more than enough women out there not to play such mundane, outdated games.

Missed out on what? The first kiss is still to come. Even if she thinks ‘he’s just not that into me’ in the moment, when you call for another date, if she likes you, she will be happy to be proven wrong.
Then you both still have the kiss to look forward to. It may even be better because you will have had more time spent getting to know each other and for chemistry to grow.

A sucky kiss?….well yes, that would blow it.

So, if you do want to see him again, accepting the kiss is a good idea.

If you don’t want to see him again, give him the handshake of doom. That’s a fairly easy signal for a guy to read.

For all the attraction people up above, sure, you can say that women might take some time, others might take 5 seconds, but if you can’t see yourself kissing the other person, don’t waste your time.

I gotta tell ya, that is the nonverbal equivalent to saying I have zero attraction and am doing this to be polite & not hurt your feelings.”

Vino, There have been maybe 3 men who I met online, gone out with for the first time, spent 2 hours with and said goodnight with a handshake. THIER move, not mine. I wouldn’t shove my hand out there as I always think a hug is nice and have at times even wanted a kiss. I let the man make the move and thankfully, have not had to turn my head at the last minute.

These ‘handshake’ men wanted to see me again and the kiss came at the end of date #2.

I was fine with it, in fact I got to look forward to date #2 with the goodnight kiss in the back of my mind and the anticipation was nice. I said it before, what is the rush? If people want to kiss at the end of the first date, I certainly don’t think it’s wrong but it shouldn’t be expected.

As in the example, the girl wasn’t sure how she felt but ‘did it anyway’. Sure, maybe doing it anyway would spare his feelings and maybe give her insight to her own, but I prefer to WANT to kiss someone not just go with it because he expected it.