Comments on: Guys Who Call Too Much Or Guys Who Don’t Call Enough?

By: Joe Black

Joe Black — Tue, 25 Dec 2012 17:06:34 +0000

I’ve read all these posts and I can say I’ve been the nice guy who has called a lot and texted a lot and I have gottrn laid a lot.I am hunter and I dont’ eat if I dont’ hunt.One girl told that she was turned off by the fact that I called a lot but it didn’t bother me becuase the the other girl I was talking with didn’t have a problem with it lol.I don’t play games and I believe in Neg digs.If you have to break somebody down to get them in bed you are a low life.There is a difference in being a nice guy and being a doormat.Like someone said here when you are comfortable with yourself you won’t allow someone to string you along and call you when it fits their fancy.Respect your self and require it from your partner.Would you choose a friend like this?

By: filipino

filipino — Wed, 11 Jul 2012 18:01:45 +0000

Evan, you are sooo right! It happens a lot of time when you like someone who doesn’t like you back. A lot of individuals have been in this situation before, even if you drop a few hints it still not working or either doesn’t see the little hints or doesn’t do anything to reciprocate your feelings. It’s the same feeling you gave to that someone who has a feeling for you but your heart is with someone else.

By: Dagaz

Dagaz — Mon, 19 Mar 2012 15:52:25 +0000

Rare case when i disagree with Evan))
most common scenario is: at the beginning he calls, he makes efforts, he courtships, he values etc.
but. when she falls for that good guy, given him the same feedback, he gets cold feet(or whatever is his reason) and pulls away.
the countless amount of examples for that, alas.
so, perhaps, these types of good guys want to be treated with cold shoulder? they seem just not to do and how to act otherwise?

By: Lorena

Lorena — Thu, 01 Dec 2011 06:17:51 +0000

My dilema is much like the beginning part of the article, met this guy and it seems that almost immedately he was smitten with me. He flattered me with comments and pretty much laid down how things would be if we were together. Which for me was refreshing because it was always me “laying down the cards” well not to the extent he did(for me it was pretty much saying lets take it slow, be respectfull and don’t even think about getting too handsy). We do have things in common and loved that he sang a song for me. The problem is that he calls every single day and i am not much of a “every day call me” person, I would like to see where it goes but don’t know how to handle the daily calls thing. Also we haven’t even me yet and already he is talking about meeting his parents.

By: Just me

Just me — Tue, 19 Apr 2011 19:48:04 +0000

I totally get the point this article is making. Evan is not talking about over-the-top stalker types, here, just the person who is open and expressive enough to say hey, I really like you and I’m genuinely interested in you and I’m not afraid to show it.

It works in reverse too. Guys chase girls whose interest in them is totally lukewarm and then ignore the girl who is open and direct enough to say hey, you have my attention if you want it.

What’s up with that I wonder? It seems like a common scenario in my observation. I wonder if it’s nature’s way of making sure the guy is attracted enough that he’s gonna work hard to provide for the family and that the girl is not so interested that the guy won’t be driven to work hard? It’s gotta be doing something for the courtship, or it wouldn’t be so common? Who knows …

Anyhoo, I think the point of this article is valid for both genders. Chasing the girl with lukewarm interest, particularly if it’s an online match with someone long distance, really leads a guy open to being led on by a woman who will take the fun times while looking for her real Mr. Right and same goes for the ladies.

To pursue a long-distance match, I think you really gotta establish there is solid interest in both parties in the match’s potential, and be a little more open than you normally would be in a dating situation. I think interest should just be taken as a data point that is positive. At that point you don’t really know enough to reject a match just based on that one thing, unless it really is way way over the top.

By: Roger

Roger — Wed, 30 Sep 2009 23:15:25 +0000

As a guy who has to navigate the flip-side of this conversation. I think the situation is simpler than it appears. Given a reasonably good level of social skills on the part of the guy, he will contact the woman if he wants to get together again.
If I have failed to call back because I was super busy, or was afraid of being rejected*. A followup call by the woman is appropriate. I don’t instantly assume she is too “forward,” rather appreciate the interest.
If a guy’s communication style, such as calling too much or too little, does not suit you, let him know. If he isn’t willing to make some changes, then things aren’t going to work. Cut your losses.
I’ve found the best way to guarantee continuity in communications is to make a date for the next encounter. Assuming things are going well and I want to continue, before the end I’ll say. “I really enjoyed our [call,email,date…}I’d like to do it again! Then set up another opportunity. Ok for the woman to initiate this question.
True, the above question can force an end to getting to know eachother, but in my experience, if a person who is right there isn’t enjoying themselves enough to continue, a graceful exit saves everyone wasting their time.
Roger

By: Carmen Smith

Carmen Smith — Sun, 20 Sep 2009 16:43:40 +0000

I just met this guy, and already he’s calling me several times in one hour – I didn’t answer because the number was unfamiliar. Now I know it’s he, because he sent an email letting me know he’d been calling. I do hope he’s not going to be a problem, because I am not the type of female who yaps away on a phone all day, and I do like my space – that is why I’m still single at 39!

By: JuJu

JuJu — Wed, 03 Jun 2009 22:54:50 +0000

That’s not something you can do online, though.

Would you like it if a man asked you for such references??

By: vlh

vlh — Wed, 03 Jun 2009 20:20:58 +0000

Actually yes. Most of my friends who are in happy relationships met someone through mutual friends who vouched for them for each other. That’s kind of like having references…

By: JuJu

JuJu — Wed, 03 Jun 2009 20:00:07 +0000

Are you serious, vlh? About the character references?