That leads us to the next part of today’s tough love post: “Why would any man dump you, Jae?” (Note to other readers: this a good thing for you to contemplate, too, since humility and self-awareness are the keys to any long-term relationship.)
From your email, I’ve learned a few things:
Stop looking down on nice guys who want to commit to you.
You have a big ego.
You don’t find most men attractive.
You won’t date within your own race.
You look down on the commitment-oriented white men who fall for your sister since they’re beneath your standards.
Do I even need to say anything else as to why you’re still single?
No, I do not.
If you want to find love, just undo everything I restated above.
Get over yourself. You may be attractive and successful, but quality men care more about your kindness and character and humor than how much you make.
Learn to give men a chance, even if they’re not your type. After all, don’t you want a bunch of Caucasian men to give YOU a chance even if you’re not THEIR type?
Open up to black men, since that’s the most obvious pool of candidates who’d be interested in you.
Stop looking down on nice guys who want to commit to you. They’re better long-term relationship bets than the white men who are using you for exotic sex, don’t you think?
I appreciate your frustration and thank you for your letter, but you’re completely focused on things you can’t change (white men!) instead of the only thing you CAN change (your perceptions, actions and reactions.)
Why He Disappeared is the smart, strong, successful woman's guide to understanding men. If you want to learn how men think, and rediscover how to have meaningful relationships - all from a man's point of view - click here to learn Why He Disappeared.
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