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Go on, admit it.
You’ve had one or two “you just know” moments.
If you don’t know what a “you just know” moment is, it’s something like this:
You’re dating a guy and everything is clicking. There’s chemistry, passion, talk of a future – and you say to your friends about your beloved boyfriend:
“You just know when it’s right.”
Six months later, you’re single.
I’m not teasing you about this. I had a “you just know” moment with girlfriends in both 2003 and 2004.
That’s right. I felt connected to both of them. I felt alive when I was around them. I felt that they fully “got” me. I genuinely thought both of them were my soul mates.
I was dead wrong.
If you ever thought that “you just knew,” but life showed you otherwise, you’re in great company. The question remains, however:
CAN you “just know” when it’s right?
SHOULD you “just know” when it’s right?
Do you HAVE to “just know” when it’s right?
These aren’t easy questions to answer. I’ve written a lot about chemistry vs. compatibility. Both are important components of relationships, as you know. However, most of us mistake chemistry for happiness.
I was talking with one of my former interns yesterday.
However, most of us mistake chemistry for happiness.
She was in a tempestuous ten-month relationship with a man with whom she felt incredible chemistry. And with chemistry pulling her towards him, she never really looked up to notice that her boyfriend wasn’t always very nice to her. He was highly judgmental. He wasn’t a fair fighter. He constantly gave her a hard time. He didn’t support her and love her unconditionally. He never made her feel safe about a future.
Still, she couldn’t help herself. She mistook chemistry for happiness and couldn’t pull herself away for ten long months.
Why He Disappeared is the smart, strong, successful woman's guide to understanding men. If you want to learn how men think, and rediscover how to have meaningful relationships - all from a man's point of view - click here to learn Why He Disappeared.
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