Comments on: I’d Rather Have Sex With My Cheating Ex Than With My Devoted Boyfriend

By: K1w1angel

K1w1angel — Sat, 06 Apr 2013 18:06:52 +0000

Another analogy I use which is quite a giggle to get my point across (although nothing changes)
Imagine you are going on a holiday together, you plan it and get excited. You pack your bag and head to the airport, book in, off you go to your destination on the plane. You get there, its brilliant, the experience is well worth the excitement.
Well, the way I see it, my man is sitting in the pool at the destination having his bourbon, where am I??? I am still packing my bloody bag lol

By: K1w1angel

K1w1angel — Sat, 06 Apr 2013 18:03:40 +0000

Gawd this sounds like my life, although Im sort of trapped now and ready to marry the guy in 3 weeks, it worries me this is my life forever with one minute man, I hear you, good sex is something that feels good, lasts and isnt over in a minute. I believe hes a lazy lover. I have spoken to him, guided him, given books, videos etc we talk and talk and then you get to bed and hes apparently forgotten everything, there isnt an iota of stamina, hes literally over so fast. I have this analogy of sex with him…
It is like he has told me we are going for a v8 super car ride and I get all excited and get behind the wheel only to have him grab the keys jump in and piss off without me. I am still standing there trying to get my shoes on lol….this is sex with my man, boring as batshit, alas what the hell am I to do now.

By: Noor

Noor — Thu, 07 Jul 2011 17:36:29 +0000

THIS IS EXACTLY MY LIFE.

By: Steve

Steve — Mon, 11 Aug 2008 16:39:38 +0000

@Cute Redhead, post #41: ROFL.
When I see the same message reiterated many times I think people are talking from being screwed or having read something in a book. Either way it reflects a paucity of experience. Is your alias inspired by the “cute redhead” from the peanuts cartoon?

By: vino

vino — Mon, 11 Aug 2008 16:21:44 +0000

Do people even read what’s written anymore? Or do they just attach whatever exaggerated meaning they choose to read into things in order to suit their tastes?

By: Cute Redhead

Cute Redhead — Mon, 11 Aug 2008 04:18:18 +0000

You mean, you guys haven’t had hot sex with a nice person? Wow. Shocking! Because that is absolutely the best. It’s just mind-blowing. But if you aren’t wired that way maybe it isn’t possible for you. I mean, if you need that sado-masochistic thing to get off — that’s too bad. Now THAT I would say would be a good reason to get into therapy.

But I guess if that’s what you need to get off there is probably some incentive to think that “everybody” is that way and so to see everybody that way. Must be very sad and lonely.

By: vino

vino — Sun, 10 Aug 2008 23:52:02 +0000

My friend cinn,

Actually, I am saying that when people compare sex (and they do – both sexes), the hot crazy sex with usually the crazy person is the more memorable. I’m not saying the crazy person is worth it for the sex at all. Quite the opposite. The highs (such as sex) are higher, and the lows are lower. Not healthy at all.

But when viewing sex as a comparison as our OP Lisa has done, “you are likely to make mature, emotionally healthy women (and men, as this thread’s subject) feel, exactly, inadequate.”

Actually I didn’t direct my comments with the purpose of making women feel bad at all. I thought they were unisex, applying equally to both.

By: cinnamon

cinnamon — Sun, 10 Aug 2008 18:23:02 +0000

thanks Steve,
Sorry, I don’t really have a problem with Lisa’s post, I wouldn’t be able to count all the situations when a genuinely nice guy was interested in me and I did not feel the same way. Each time I concluded it would be unfair towards the guy to lead him on. It had absolutely nothing to do with the guy’s possible style of lovemaking.
If you are attracted to someone, then as little as a kiss in the neck will send you to heaven.

I cannot agree that women are attracted to jerks, but many women are attracted to confident men (some of them happen to turn out jerks, but these two things are unrelated).
It takes some time to get over a guy who you thought was adorable, but turned out to be a jerk. It doesn’t happen overnight.

You can be a nice person, man or woman, and still be able to assert yourself, show imagination, sense of humor, love variety, be passionate, be able to take up a fight (and play fair) and so on, and so on.

and vino,
By claiming that nice people aren’t just as good in bed, you are likely to make mature, emotionally healthy women feel, exactly, inadequate. I’m not sure if that’s your intention.

By: Steve

Steve — Sun, 10 Aug 2008 15:27:26 +0000

@Cinnamon , post #34, Lisa did not do that. She sent a letter to Evan and was then good enough to satisfy our curiosity by posting a follow up. I think some regular commentators morphed the subject into what you are talking about.

Here is a thought on that subject.

If someone is hooked up with a nice person and they are having great sex then they are likely not having any problems to motivate them to send emails into dating blogs.

By: mic

mic — Sat, 09 Aug 2008 16:54:43 +0000

Physical attraction certainly doesn’t guarantee good sex. Some good-looking people are very self-centered, which doesn’t make for good sexual performance (or being a good partner). But the “great body” comment raises the question of whether greater attractiveness leaves an exaggerated impression of performance after the act is over. Halo effect.