Comments on: Is Fear Keeping You From Finding a Relationship?

By: Mickey

Mickey — Thu, 28 Feb 2013 06:14:33 +0000

Sara 55:
I guess one man’s realism is automatically your idea of trolling. Oh well…

By: Mickey

Mickey — Thu, 28 Feb 2013 06:12:55 +0000

Karl said (#52):
“If women are consistently smacking you down for asking them out, either you’re encountering a completely different population than I am, or you’re approaching them in a way that causes them to be a lot more antagonistic towards you than they would be in normal circumstances.”
Not really, Karl. My observation over the years has led me to believe that the majority of women tend to assume the worst of men, and their reactions tend to bear that out more often than not. Thus, since I’ve long since lost hope that I can ever find a happy ending in the dating farce, I don’t bother approaching knowing that rejection is a given.

By: Mickey

Mickey — Mon, 17 Dec 2012 23:30:22 +0000

Sara:
That’s a fair question. My answer is I read the interesting posts and sometimes put my two cents in. I have no ulterior motive.

By: Sara

Sara — Mon, 17 Dec 2012 18:14:50 +0000

Mickey,
My mistake, I was under the impression that you had referred to your exwife as a “whore”, however, not all women demonize men. Considering there have been several statements made publicly this year by male politicians and, most recently a judge, that women’s bodies have ways to avoid rape, I think it’s the other way around. In any case, a website to help women find relationships with men is hardly frequented by women who demonize men. I’m bisexual, but prefer relationships with men. If I had a choice, why would I choose “evil” men?
As to my “Why bother?” question, you misunderstood. Why do you bother coming onto this site, a relationship site FOR WOMEN (allegedly as I’ve said before, since men also frequent this site) to state over and over how you don’t bother with relationships, and make it a point to tell other men not to bother, when they clearly are looking for relationships? Why do you bother? That you do tells me that you are hoping to find some woman who will pity you, accept your bitterness and verbal attacks, and be your doormat. Or, as I’ve said before, you are simply an internet troll. I’m asking you why you bother because I am genuinely curious. With everything I’ve been through, I could hate men with a coldness deeper than your hatred for women, but I don’t. I have two brothers, and I know several other (happily married) men, who are decent, good, kind, gentle men, and I know better than to believe that all men are the scum of the earth.
So, Mickey, why do you bother coming to this site?

By: Mickey

Mickey — Mon, 17 Dec 2012 17:23:19 +0000

Sara:
I don’t have an ex-wife; I’ve never been married. Anyway, as I’ve mentioned before, as politically correct as it is in this day and age to demonize men just for being men, it’s a little hard for me to turn the other cheek.
As to your question “why bother?” rest assured, I don’t.

By: Sara

Sara — Mon, 17 Dec 2012 13:46:50 +0000

Mickey, If you go around with a chip on your shoulder and constantly tell people what a “whore” your wife was, and how women just want “blah,blah,blah”, pretty much all women with whom you come into contact are going to come to the same conclusion. You come on a site allegedly created to give women advice on how to find a good man, and make those kinds of statements, and it really is not attractive at all. So, my question to you is “why bother?” If you want to know what it is you are doing wrong, you’ve been told. If you simply want to be pandered to, why don’t you go to some misogynistic site dedicated to men who hate their “whore” ex-wives, and leave us alone?

By: Karl R

Karl R — Sat, 15 Dec 2012 21:01:35 +0000

Mickey said: (#11) "At this point in time, if a guy even attempts to approach a woman for friendship, dating, companionship, etc., it is more likely than not that the approach will be met with a harsh smackdown. I’ve seen this happen too many times over the years to believe otherwise now." Perhaps you (or the men you're observing) need to change the way they approach women. Every time I've approached a woman in person (since I left high school), my advance was either accepted or politely declined. When I did online dating, I also had a number of times where I received no response. Given the likely outcomes ("yes", no answer, polite "no thanks") there just wasn't anything to be afraid of. Mickey, If women are consistently smacking you down for asking them out, either you're encountering a completely different population than I am, or you're approaching them in a way that causes them to be a lot more antagonistic towards you than they would be in normal circumstances.

By: Mickey

Mickey — Sat, 15 Dec 2012 06:44:06 +0000

Sara 50:
To that I can only say: opinions are like noses – everyone’s got one.

By: Sara

Sara — Wed, 14 Nov 2012 20:06:43 +0000

David T (16)
I have been in a similar spot. Raised my two kids alone, so I don’t need a partner for that, I can support myself financially, so I don’t need a partner for that. I convinced myself for 10 years that I didn’t need anyone else (this after leaving a very violent man), but after 10 years alone, I’ve realized that what I really want is companionship, partnership, just having someone to talk to, and cuddle with, having someone around to care about, who will care about me. I understand the “shatterproof heart”, I’ve been there. But as content as I am single, I know that I have missed out on a lot by closing myself off.
One other thing I’d like to point out to a few people on here, Mia and Mickey in particular: I’ve read several of your posts, and you both do come across as hostile and very negative. Mia, you constantly put down other women who find good men, while talking about how much better looking you are. Looks really aren’t everything. And Mickey, I have written you off as either an internet troll, or just a very bitter man. It’s unfortunate that the two of you can’t look in the mirror. One thing I had to face up to is that in all of my bad relationships, the common denominator was me. For my entire life I’ve always been reminded that I’m not pretty enough or smart enough or successful enough. And, of course, I believed that I didn’t deserve love, although I wasn’t aware of this consciously.
After 40 years, I’ve learned that I’d rather be valued for what I have to offer than devalued for what I don’t have. I don’t have a super model body, but I have a lot of other assets. Consequently, I don’t compare myself to other women anymore.
The impression that I get from most of the posts is that people (primarily the women) are trying to figure out what the other wants so that they can BECOME that.
I can handle being alone, and I can accept my imperfections, but anyone who wants to be with me would also have to.

By: Nicole

Nicole — Thu, 04 Oct 2012 23:03:22 +0000

@Mia #39…I think I’m most shocked that you kept going out with a guy who admitted to you that he was anti-Semitic. Did you seriously want to possibly marry a guy who will teach your kids to hate?

That just seems a little off to me.