Women Choosing to Be Single Instead of Married in Old Age

I really didn’t plan on beating this marriage thing to death, but there have been a spate of articles about marriage recently.

This one validates something I already suspected from writing this blog for 5 years: that single women, in particular, are opting out of marriage and remarriage.

It makes sense from many perspectives. Women are self-sufficient in a way they weren’t 30 years ago. The stigma against divorce is largely gone. There are other single women with whom you can have a strong community. And there’s been an increase in people looking for happiness and being unwilling to suffer through unhappy marriages. These are all good things.

I agree wholeheartedly that it’s better to be single than to be in a bad relationship.

Because if it’s not abundantly clear from the previous Saturday posts on marriage, I’m not a dogmatist, I’m a pragmatist. I believe that marriage can and should be a positive force, but only if both parties are on the same page and willing to make the necessary sacrifices for that marriage. I agree wholeheartedly that it’s better to be single than to be in a bad relationship.

Just don’t forget who’s choosing the bad relationship – you.

Which means that you can choose a good relationship and a good marriage when you’re good and ready.

You don’t have to opt out of it for life as so many of these women in the NYT article do. Click here to read the article if you have a NYT subscription.

Your thoughts are greatly appreciated.


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  1. 91

    Amy makes some very relevant and interesting  points and I can honestly say that the older I have gotten and the more I see if live the harder it has become to stand by the whole consensus of men and women being equally ‘good’

    I look around the world and see murder and domestic violence and war and rape and child abuse. The vast majority of these crimes are perpetrated by men against women.

    I see women valued purely for youth and appearance. I see a world where I stop and question whether men secretly hate us. I read only recently research by professor Gail Dines that showed 88percent of mainstream porn showed violence against women in the form of physical  abuse, spitting on the woman or calling them sluts and whores. Considering men are by far the main consumers im left to question why qbuse against women is so exciting to So many men

    it is really becoming harder and harder to not question whether men are simply

    less evolved

  2. 92

    Who says that every woman needs sex? They, they need, they for sure have a partner. After I broke with my partner (love of my life), I did never wish to have sex with anybody. All I need is a good friend to help me; but men don’t need women for friends.


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