And ultimately, Vicki, that’s really all you can do. You can’t erase his past, his hurt, or his shame. All you can do is make him feel safe and loved and lucky.
You can’t erase his past, his hurt, or his shame. All you can do is make him feel safe and loved and lucky.
He may never “get over” the experience of having blind faith in a partner; I know my wife hasn’t. But, if he’s emotionally available – and thereby, a suitable partner – he’ll realize that you have nothing to do with his ex-wife. To keep you at bay because of an awful mistake made by another woman 16 years ago, would effectively mean the end of your relationship. He’s gotta let you in.
The woman who let me in, despite her trust issues, became my wife. The woman who didn’t is just another ex. Which is just a longwinded way of saying: do your best, but it’s not really up to you.
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