So, if I were you, I would put zero pressure on your son. Let him know to have safe sex and try to be an ethical person by not hurting women unnecessarily or for too long. That’s all that you can do.
If he’s going to undergo a change of heart, you can’t impose your beliefs and values on him. It will have to be on his own terms.
95% of people eventually get married.
However, none of them do so because their mothers tell them to.
Soon, he’s going to notice that all of his friends are getting married.
Soon, he’s going to be the only single guy at weddings.
Soon, he’s going to be the “old guy” at clubs and parties.
Soon, he’s going to discover that all of his single friends aren’t available to go out and pick up women.
Soon, he’s going to discover that it’s somewhat hollow to keep recycling women, week after week, month after month.
Soon, he’s going to think about his own loneliness.
Then again, I could be wrong.
Maybe your son is wired differently. Maybe he didn’t see your marriage as something he’d like to emulate. Maybe he doesn’t see the value in family. Maybe he’s just a shallow horndog, who truly values sex a lot more than he values intimacy and sharing. Maybe he genuinely prefers to be alone.
Only time will tell.
But, if it’s any consolation to you, 95% of people eventually get married.
However, none of them do so because their mothers tell them to. They do so because they determine that the value of love, commitment, and stability is greater than the value of a variety of partners.
As long as he thinks that variety is better than monogamy, he’s going to continue to make that decision.
I’ll bet that he changes his mind eventually. But it might not be until his early 40’s that he realizes that life is better when you’re not alone.
Just remember: it’s not about YOU and YOUR grandkids.
It’s about HIS happiness.
And if this makes him happy (and doesn’t hurt anybody else), all you can do as a mother is to support him.
And don’t get attached to any of his girlfriends.
Why He Disappeared is the smart, strong, successful woman's guide to understanding men. If you want to learn how men think, and rediscover how to have meaningful relationships - all from a man's point of view - click here to learn Why He Disappeared.
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