Adventures in Online Dating, Volume 4

Now that Joanna’s attracting a bunch more attention online, the whole picture begins to come together for her this week. Moving men from email to the phone to the real life date, being a great first date, breaking things off in a classy fashion – topics that might seem obvious, but are not – are covered during Week 5. Stay tuned for next week’s final class…

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We began Week 5 with an opportunity to share our online dating experiences to date. After looking at the initial emails of a couple of bootcamp members, Evan shared tips on making those first emails more effective and reasons why some of them fizzled. I’ve used random questions in the past as a way to continue in email with someone who immediately wants to move to the phone, and now I’ve learned the technique has a second use as a way to see if maybe there is a little more to someone who might seem boring only because the email conversation has gotten stale.

I learned how to solve one of my big online dating issues – giving a phone number to a man and then having him call at an inopportune time.

Evan talked about moving from online to regular email and then on to phone, and how that phone call can replace the standard coffee date as a screening tool, which is much more time effective for me. I learned how to solve one of my big online dating issues – giving a phone number to a man and then having him call at an inopportune time (I start my day at 5 am and find that many Match men call when I am already asleep). Now, I’ll let someone know a few possible times to reach me, in order to set up a phone date and avoid missing one another.

We finished the call with the topic of handling rejection at various stages of online dating. Evan gave us some good guidelines to end things in a way that is classy and maintains some integrity. I got some practice – this week I needed to close things out with someone I had dated twice. In the past, I’ve gotten some angry responses to those emails, but this time, I used some of the language that Evan recommended and found that the man responded graciously. Thankful for these new tools, I look forward to our last call next week – help in the dating process.

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