Should You Be Able To Sue If You Can’t Find Love Online?
A Brooklyn man is doing just that! A recent piece on nypost.com reports that Sean McGinn is taking Match.com to court due to the “humiliation and disappointment” on lonely hearts “who feel rejected when their e-mails get no reply.”
Sean McGinn alleges the popular matchmaking Web site dangles phony date bait by posting profiles of people who no longer subscribe to its $39.99-a-month service. As a result, lovelorn singles have been “defrauded” out of millions of dollars and countless hours spent sending heartfelt missives in vain.”
McGinn is also demanding that the Internet’s biggest dating site “cease and desist its deceptive practices,” which he claims are “willfully causing emotional harm to the consumer and social harm to society at large.
“Match’s policy causes severe emotional distress and anxiety for some [subscribers], including those who keep writing e-mails to one member after another and never hear back because he/she is writing to people who’ve canceled,” his suit says.
So what are your thoughts on this case? Do you think Match.com, or any online dating site for that matter, deceives users with inaccurate claims? Would love to hear what you think. While we’re on the subject on online dating, just a reminder that the sale on my Finding the One Online CD series is only available for another 6 days. Get $100 off the complete package by clicking http://www.findingtheoneonline.com/promo/.
 |
Why He Disappeared is the smart, strong, successful woman's guide to understanding men. If you want to learn how men think, and rediscover how to have meaningful relationships - all from a man's point of view - click here to learn Why He Disappeared. |
Do You Want to Attract the Partner of Your Dreams?
If so, sign up for my free dating and relationship newsletter and receive my free eBook, The 5 Massive Mistakes You're Making In Your Love Life - And How to Turn Them Around Instantly. Simple and effective advice to jumpstart your love life.
67 Comments »Filed Under Uncategorized
Eathan 1
Seriously??? Sue them? Ok, I don’t think it’s an issue of defrauding or even worth the paper the lawsuit is on. I don’t think it’s the intention of the websites to defraud their users. If the website gives you a refund that would be enough to suffice any former user. I say it’s a waste of time and energy to sue.
Eathan´s last blog post…LF48 Is Nervous
Cilla 2
I have suspected several dating sites of posting fake profiles as a bait-and-switch technique. Because I was willing to date long distance and thinking about moving this year, I was looking at a lot of profiles for men all over the country and in several European countries. I started noticing the same pictures (always a hot guy) popping up in LA, Chicago, Copenhagen, Ibiza, etc. In some cases the profile narrative was the same; in others it was totally different. Seemed fishy to me.
After I started noticing this trend, I paid more attention to the language of the profiles. In many, although not all, instances they were poorly written, almost in broken English, and they sounded like they were composed by the same person. From the way the sentences were structured, it seemed to me like someone from Russia was writing them (the way the verbs were placed, the lack of articles, etc.).
Should people be able to sue over this? I don’t think so. Our courts are already clogged with more serious consumer cases. I do think, if the plaintiff can prove he was defrauded, he should be given his money back and the dating service should be fined for fraud. If they continue to post false profiles they should face graver legal consequences. This should not line the pockets of the broken hearted.
Honey 3
Doesn’t Match guarantee you’ll find “someone special” in 6 months or you get 6 months free? I don’t get why he thinks he can sue.
Honey´s last blog post…Away We Go
Ava 4
A few men I’ve dated/met through match.com have told me they’re regularly sent profiles that they believe are fake, usually poorly written and in broken English, as Cilla said. Profiles from Russian women seem to be most common.
My current pet peeve is that if you open an email listing potential matches, you are automatically logged on to the system. Since these are sent daily, even if you’re dating someone and not regularly logging on, it looks like you’re logging on all the time. (Yes, I admit I’m tempted to skim these emails, even if I’m not all that interested in contacting anyone). It’s created some tension with people I’ve been dating, now I just ignore it. Still, it bothers me that match does this, since it does seem like a ploy to make it seem like people are more active on the site then they really are. As we all know, it can be disconcerting to see that someone you’re dating is “online now” soon after your date.
A woman friend of mine who hasn’t been on match in years has recently received emails from them telling her that she has “new mail”.
I don’t claim to know about the legal ramifications, but It does seem that some of these tactics are not exactly above-board.
Curly Girl 5
Should you be able to sue? Of course. That’s anyone’s legal right.
Does the case have merit and will it make it to trial to be tested? I don’t know.
Are there a lot of injustices that don’t get remedied in the courts? Of course.
Would this be one of them? Who knows.
A-L 6
If the guy can read his lawsuit then he should be able to read the piece where it says when the person was last active. Now if he was writing to fraudulent profiles that all said that they were active within the last 24 hours, then he has a point. But if he’s e-mailing the godzillion folks who haven’t been active within the last three weeks, then it’s his problem thinking that he was going to send the ideal e-mail to get them active again.
Jennifer 7
You’ve got to be fing kidding me. No way he should be able to sue. Next he’ll be suing his dates that told him they had a good time and would call him later and never did.
I think most online dating sites use some deceptive practices. I think, unfortunately, that there are fake profiles on just about every site (and it’s likely not even the company that puts them up- some of the commenters on this blog discuss putting up fake ‘recon’ profiles). I think the companies probably could do more to prevent this kind of thing but don’t. But i know there are lots and lots of real people on these sites too, and I don’t believe any of the practices that these companies employ are lawsuit-worthy.
And a smaller point, on Match can’t you tell how long ago someone logged on? And how can he prove the profiles he wrote to were fake?
Diana 8
From my experience, I have received e-mails for flirts that have been sent; only to sign in and there are no flirts. And sometimes I receive flirts for profiles that suddenly go missing, and the guy is always good looking. I wonder if these are scams or fake profiles generated either by criminals, hoping to quickly secure an e-mail addy, etc. or the site. I strongly suspect that some of the flirts are not genuine, but sent to drum up business. There is also the problem of writing to seemingly available profiles when, in fact, they are canceled accounts, but still in the search engine for that site.
There might be grounds for suing for fraud, depending on the stated terms and conditions of the site, but not a lonely heart.
Selena 9
Never tried match, but I’ve always wondered if those couples in eHarmony tv commercials were actual couples, or actors. Yahoo personals always shows fresh-faced college girls in their ads – I rather assumed they were models and not singles currently on the site. Interesting to see what happens with this lawsuit. Can’t help thinking “poor baby” though about the guy sueing. Does seem kinda whiney.
Mikko Kemppe 10
I agree with Evan that I don’t think this would be something worth suing about. Curly Girl is right of course in saying that yes we should still have the right to sue. Cilla, I think brings up also a very interesting point about a bait-and-switch technique that I did not think about.
I think this is just another example of the crazy dysfunctional world that we live in. I think we need to concentrate becoming the best people we can and let others waist their energy in other frivolous things.
Mikko Kemppe´s last blog post…Do Men Just Want Sex? Should My Decision Be To Wait Or Not To Wait?
Jennifer 11
@Selena #9 You know I don’t know about the commercials, but lots of people have complaints about eharmony around inactive user profiles in the system. You get sent active and inactive profiles in your matches. I also don’t believe you can tell the last time someone signed in to eHarmony the way you can on Match.
Curly Girl 12
He could be a lawyer and he might have spotted something that is actionable. Doesn’t seem like there are any lawyers on this site, though. Would be interesting to hear their POV on it.
Paul 13
I think that not only are there false profiles, but lots of shadey things happen. Case in point was when I was on EHarmony and didn’t get any matches sent to me for a while before my term was up. Then suddenly, right before it about to expire I get all kinds of them. And when you’r 3 months is up, or whatever time you signed up for, it automaticall signs you up at teh highest rate if you don’t stop it. That’s terrible, so yes, there are a lot of shadey practices but none lawsuit worthy. i guess if it seems to good to be true it is.
Leah 14
Yes! Match.com does deceive it users. I posted my profile, while I was just looking I recieved 3 emails within a week. I was excited thinking 3 men want to converse with me. So I joined. When I went to my inbox NONE of the 3 had profiles!
Now if it had been only one I wouldn’t have thought any thing of it but Three?
Michel 15
To sue or not to sue…that’s the question.
IMHO and as a person who actually did sue a corporation recently I can tell you that its alot of stress and headache win or lose and it could get damn expensive.
Only the OP can decide if it’s worth the drama, expense, etc.
That said I believe that internet dating is a farce. It’s a business. Better to take classes, attend seminars, workshops, or networking/social events of interest and increase the potential of meeting someone face to face with who one may have something in common with plus you get to actually DO something, learn something, GO someplace. It’s too easy to get caught up in VR. Better to interact in real life, get outside, get active…
K 16
People that complain about receiving emails after a long hiatus (cancellation, dating someone, etc.) should just HIDE THEIR PROFILES! It’s really not rocket science, but if you don’t want to receive the annoying emails, just hide your profile (whether you are still a subscriber or not), and nobody will bother you anymore, because if you still receive an email or a wink after the hiding, you know for sure it’s fake and won’t be all tickled to know who this mysterious stranger is. The cynic in me says that if you are no longer active but don’t take the one minute effort to hide your profile, part of you still wants the thrill and wants to keep the options open. There is nothing wrong with that — just stop complaining that you are cheated by the site.
Cilla 17
@ Selena
I agree, he sounds whiney. Maybe he has the legal grounds to sue for fraud, but to take damages in this case would be ludicrous. As Jennifer said, it starts us down the slippery slope of being able to sue for bad dates, break ups, etc. I hope he is just trying to make a point that this is fraudulent behavior on the part of the site, and it must stop. But my cynical side says he’s just another American with a frivolous law suit trying to make some cash by doing nothing.
The expectations around these dating sites have become ridiculous! I have received nasty emails from men who didn’t get a response from me, not just to emails but to winks! Can you imagine being able to sue somebody for not winking back to you when you wink at them across a bar in real life?
In one instance, I had chosen to ignore the scathing email from my unrequited suitor, as do all of them. Then it got creepy. He sent another email, making it clear he knew through friends who I was and where I lived (he referenced points in my neighborhood). I had never seen the guy before and didn’t know who would have given him that information about me. He demanded I send a formal Match.com reply, which I did, just to shut him up. He ceased communication with me, but I was ready to report him to the site (and legal authorities, if necessary) had he pursued further. Since he knew where I lived, I was happy he just went away. I wasn’t worried about him breaking in–I have two Rottweilers–but I thought about him keying my car, stealing my mail, etc.
texasdarlin 18
I’ve used match more than any other online dating services.
@ Honey #3 Yes, they do. There are caveats though. 1) Your profile has to stay up (not hidden) the entire 6 months. 2) You have to write at least 5 different people each month. You can track your progress & match tells you how many days you have left in the month.
Match does tell you how long it has been since the member has been active. Anywhere from “online now” to “active over three weeks ago”
I’ve faced some of the same issues. I’ve received a wink only to log on and find out the profile’s unavailable. I’ve received daily matches and when I click on one I’m interested in I find out that he was last active “over three weeks ago”. Not too long ago, I was frustrated and cleared out all of my connections and within a few hours I had several winks. I’ve dated men who have told me they get emails from Russian women a lot.
Some match’s practices may be deceptive in order to keep business going, but it also may be just good old fashion computer error. It’s hard to say. I’ve had a positive experience on match, but right now it’s looking like I’ll get the next 6 months free.
Should this guy be able to sue? Possibly-assuming he can prove that match engages in fraudulent business practices, but not because of humiliation and disappointment on lonely hearts who feel rejected when their e-mails get no reply. I’m assuming match operates the same in every state as far as its rules and the structure of the website. So if I’m seeing what I’ve mentioned above he should be seeing the same thing. If he’s suing because he can’t find a date that’s his problem not Match’s. I have to agree with Selena (#9), he sound’s like a whiner. From the information given, it’s sounds like a frivolous lawsuit to me. If he’s so unhappy, he should ask for his money back.
Racer x 19
I know for a fact that all dating sites post bogus profiles and send out bogus flirts. It’s a way to make you think that the site is more active than it is. If you are on a site long enough you’ll see the same faces you’ve come to know being advertised as “new”. You can call it unethical, bogus, misleading or just plain lieing but having the right to sue?…..absolutely not!!! Whether we like it or not this online dating is a bit of a game. I would admit that when i first started dating online i used to get upset and pissed off at all the games and tactics being played. But after 6 months of being online i realized what it’s all about and now am much more savy as to what’s going on out there. Btw, if you can’t pick out a bogus profile from a mile away, you deserve what you get!!!
ADP 20
I have personally seen some of the dating sites “bait-n-switch”: !) Showing people as “new members” when the haven’t logged onto the site for months or 2) Just as your subscription is up or you’ve canceled, a flood of profiles you’ve never seen before are e-mailed to you or 3) being very, very general so that you can get as many matches as possible, but then never seeing these “new profiles”. With Yahoo, the only way I got to see new profiles was to literally one-by-one eliminate recycled profiles from showing up and then lo and behold fresh profiles.
Joe 21
From the quote, it sounds to me like the dude is ticked off that Match allows people to post profiles without subscribing, and doesn’t have any way of letting people know that those people aren’t subscribers. Does Match allow non-subscribers to respond to e-mails (or even read them)? If not, he does have a point. You could be sending messages out to dozens of people who aren’t going to be replying. Would any of those people reply even if they were subscribers? Who can say?
Steve 22
@K, #17
+1
@Ava, #4
I did not know that! I never made an issue of it, but a woman I had a few dates with always had her match.com profile list as being active within 24 hours. This was during a phase when she was so swamped with work she had to cancel dates. It never bothered me. I just decided she probably popped into match.com during work like I did to take a break.
Jennifer 23
@Cilla #16- How horrible! I’ve never understood the random bitterness that I encountered sometimes either- and this happened even if i wrote thanks but no thanks. Signing up for an online service does not entitle one to a date, or even a response, but some people get really upset/rude about not getting the responses they want.
@Texasdarlin #17 ‘humiliation and disappointment’ really jumped out at me too. Really, *humiliated* because someone didn’t write him back? That’s waayy too much.
Steve 24
I hope this guy is a lawyer looking to make a name for himself or establish a precedent. If he isn’t, he is a fool. If he can’t handle spending the price of dating site subscription to no avail or having some of his emails ignored he isn’t ready for the dating world.
Michael 25
Just thinking about the plaintiff here: if simply not getting an e-mail back causes him “humiliation” (his words, or his lawyer’s), this is clearly someone who isn’t ready to date. Would he sue a date that didn’t return his phone calls?
That said, this widespread practice of allowing profiles to be visible even though they can’t make or receive contact is sketchy at best.
Michael´s last blog post…Talkin Pants
Selena 26
@Cilla #16
I haven’t tried internet dating as yet, but it seems to me that if the purpose is to potentially meet more singles than you would going about your everyday life – then there is also the potential of meeting more creeps than you might going about your everyday life.
The rebuffed “stalker-ish” guy you mentioned sounds like the type who could also create a scene if he didn’t get your attention in your neighborhood bar when you just stopped in for a glass of wine. It IS scary he had some landmark’s as to where you lived. That would bother the hell out of me. Good thing he dropped off the map after you wrote him. To busy harassing someone new perhaps?
Carol 27
It’s never good to sue, but usually that’s the only way companies “get the message”. Match was absolutely the worst dating site (next to eharmony a close second) I ever tried. It’s a scam when attractive people write you just as your time is up. Then when you try to get your “free” six months they kick you out on a technicality, you didn’t write x amount of “new” people every x days so you don’t qualify. If a class action lawsuit were started, this would cease. There are no guarantees, but dating is tough enough without these marketing tactics that do nothing but discourage people who want to find someone.
JM 28
I don’t think there would be enough lawyers in the world to handle all the cases of people who chose to sue when they couldn’t find love online. I agree with the above posts – there is definitely deception with most of the major online dating sites.
I would say that Sean McGinn should have contacted the Better Business Bureau before he contacted a lawyer. Boy, talk about living in a litigious society!
Karl R 29
Cilla said: (#2)
“I started noticing the same pictures (always a hot guy) popping up in LA, Chicago, Copenhagen, Ibiza, etc. In some cases the profile narrative was the same; in others it was totally different. Seemed fishy to me.”
This sounds like a member was engaging in fraudulent activities (possibly trying to learn information that could be used for identity theft). Match.com could take the position that they’re unable to monitor the activities of everyone using their services.
Racer x said: (#18)
“If you are on a site long enough you’ll see the same faces you’ve come to know being advertised as ‘new’.”
Some sites (not Match.com) will list a profile as “new” if the user updates some of the information on their profile. Savvy users will occasionally update their profiles in order to benefit from the attention that new members receive.
However, I think some of Match.com’s practices are deliberately deceptive. Most members don’t realize that their profiles stay visible when they deactivate their account. I’m sure Match.com would claim that they “permit” their members to keep their profiles visible. However Match.com is probably the main beneficiary of this option.
I doubt the case will get far. At best, Match.com will get enough negative publicity from the case to change their policies.
Selena said: (#9)
“Never tried match, but I’ve always wondered if those couples in eHarmony tv commercials were actual couples, or actors.”
Match.com has used real members in at least one advertising campaign, and it was successful enough that they probably continued the practice. If you have a few million members to choose from, you can pick the ones that look like models and movie stars.
Curly Girl 30
Selena: LOL!
Curly Girl 31
Cilla: Have also had weird stalkerish things from online guys. Well, twice. You gotta wonder why they do this–they can’t possibly think that anything good will come of it. Or is it just hostility run amok?
casualencounters.com/blog 32
Match.com’s described practices are clearly misleading if not outright fraudulent. They deserve both barrels.
casualencounters.com/blog´s last blog post…XXXblackbook.com review
Cilla 33
@ Curly Girl
Yeah, you gotta wonder. Are they testing to see if they find someone who will put up with that nonsense? Are they not really interested in dating in the first place?
One guy wrote and told me I was a “dirt bag” for not responding. Gee, and he seemed to think I was so lovely the week before. Interestingly, all he had going for him was $. He was considerably older than my age range (which was VERY generous), paunchy, poorly dressed, and NO interests in common with me. Oh, and he lived in the middle of nowhere, geographically out of my range completely.
searchingwithin 34
Good golly Miss Molly!
Seriously, I have always been curious about why someone has not sued the company that advertises that ridiculous cologne that sells for about $3 a bottle where they arrive into a room, and because they are wearing that crap, every woman, Mother, and child attacks them. If for nothing else… than for bodily injury charges.
What happened to the day when adults were responsible for their own irresponsible choices?
It still amazes me to this day when my 20 year old son proclaims that I should run out and buy some product because the commercial states and guarantees that it is going to do…
I think, how niave can you be?
Ya know what, if you actually want to stand in court, and proudly proclaim that you are that stupid, and still make it through a jury of your peers…then more power to ya.
And if that makes me insensitive to your proclaimed pain, then I am sorry, because I find it hard to believe that you are that stupid.
searchingwithin´s last blog post…Trust In The Power of Your Femininity
Sigrid Macdonald 35
If online dating sites are misrepresenting people and being deliberately fraudulent, yeah, the guy should be able to sue.
But if individuals are displaying inaccurate pictures and profiles, that’s a different story. And I agree that the whole thing would be better off in Better Business Bureau.
Sigrid Macdonald´s last blog post…New — interview about D’Amour Road on Book Talk with J & J
sjz 36
I think all dating services should be held to a higher standard than they are being held to now. No profile should show up unless the person is an active member who has used the site in at least a month. I have been on countless dating sites that have misrepresented who their clientele were and how many people were actually users in their dating base. I don’t have a whole lot of money to keep giving to sites that lie. The worst part of these dating sites is the automatic renewal feature. So many people get renewed who don’t want to. Try finding where you can close off your account before they renew you. I actually found Match to be a good site but, don’t ever try BIG CHURCH. I swear everyone who contacted me on there had a scam going!
Shawna 37
I cancelled my subscription to eharmony a year ago and my profile is still up. Can’t get if off — but I can remove my pic and write that I’m no longer available on my profile. The bf did too. But it never gets taken down.
Natalie 38
I’m sure that many dating sites engage in dubious practices and that should definitely stop as it adds to the air of deceit that gets associated with online dating, however, my question to the complainant would be: Sending an email to someone on a dating site is not a guarantee of reply. If he hasn’t heard back, why the hell does he keep emailing them?!
Natalie´s last blog post…Can you stay friends with Mr Unavailable’s & Assclowns after you break up?- Part Two
Steve 39
@Shawna, #37
I read last year the eHarmony also does not accept homosexual clients. I *think* the owner is a conservative Christian. I guess his Christian ethics don’t extend beyond bigotry to homosexual to play fair in business with his customers.
Block Buster is the same way. Owned by conservative Christians. They edit scenes out of films they find objectionable, but they don’t make public statements about it. If you ask, they tell. In other words they interpret their ethics so they have no problem with using deception in their business.
Curly Girl 40
Wow. Very interesting info here re: online dating. Did not know.
Jennifer 41
@Steve #39- I heard eHarmony was starting a seperate site for homosexual clients called ‘Compatible Partners’ or something like that. Has anyone else heard this or did I dream it up?
mic 42
If you see the same suspicious profile on multiple sites, it’s possible that it is a scam to attract lonely hearts who will then pay for that person’s supposed emergency or travel expenses, for example. A news organization recently did a story on such scams.
mic 43
This is a complaint about the industry that has been held back for years:
Online dating is like a lottery, except that a real lottery would never imply much of a chance of success* or charge nearly as much to play.
As such, plenty of people have the right to sue, and many of them would love to get revenge for having essentially paid for nothing (or for bad experiences, such as dates who looked nothing like their profiles). It makes no sense why the services would continue their antics until the inevitable time that legally they are forced to stop when they could change their ways and probably do even better. For example, offer less-involved versions of services that Evan offers or that GBFICS offers, the latter which frankly might make more sense because it could benefit many users in areas unrelated to dating (e.g., consolation prize). By the way, yes, some clients have alluded to an unsuccessful time at online dating.
*There the analogy falls short because in online dating there is a small, highly desirable percentage that very well might win, albeit many such people don’t feel any need to use dating services.
Selena 44
Re:#39
Never knew that about Blockbuster. How can they get away with editing objectionable (to them) scenes in commercial films Steve? Wouldn’t the film industry create a HUGE uproar if that were true? It would seem to be illegal without the permission of whomever owned the rights to the film.
Marc 45
My typical response rate when I was online dating was around 10-15%. I don’t doubt that there are fake profiles on the various sites, but there’s no way 85-90% of them are fake, and that all the women that didn’t respond to me weren’t real but dummy profiles meant to lure me in. Dude’s gotta man up and realize online dating is rough for guys and simply learn how to deal, or just stop online dating.
Marc´s last blog post…Never Judge a Book By Its Do Rag
Steve 46
@Marc, comment #45
+ 1
BTW, I took a walk in your shoes. I got an obnoxious email from a date I had Saturday evening. Even after I talked it out with friends ( who used the “b word” and “c word” – vicious women! ) I was still perturbed. I decided to write about the date on a private LiveJournal page. “I’m walking in Marc’s shoes” I thought to myself. It wasn’t as well written or as funny as one of yours. It did feel great.
mic 47
Marc, maybe the question should be, What percentage of the profiles with particularly good-looking pictures are fake?
Regina 48
Oh, give me a break! Maybe if this guy got a life he wouldn’t have such a hard time finding a woman. Attractive women on dating sites get swamped with responses, so most are not going to respond to a guy who sounds like Mr. Sour Grapes here. I found my sweetie on Match so I know of what I speak.
casualencounters.com/blog 49
@Steve
Are you referring to this?
http://www.newsweek.com/id/134305
casualencounters.com/blog´s last blog post…XXXblackbook.com review
downtowngal 50
Hey, I was born with a huge brown mole on my face and can’t find a date – can I sue my parents from whom I inherited my DNA?
Ann 51
Sigh. I wish Evan would come back. It’s just better knowing he’s around.
Joe 52
@ Jennifer #41. I don’t know if that’s the name of the site, but I definitely did read that eHarmony lost a lawsuit and was required to provide access for homosexuals. From what I recall they did decide to do it at a separate site rather than the existing eHarmony.
Honey 53
EHarmony uses/endorses a scientifically-driven compatibility system. The reason that they didn’t provide matching for homosexuals was because there are no longitudinal scientific studies confirming that compatibility criteria function the same way for heterosexuals that they do for homosexuals. Thus, they couldn’t scientifically guarantee their results if they offered the service to homosexuals, which is the whole premise of their service.
Now that more such compatibility studies are coming out for various orientations, I believe the same company started a separate website for that demographic, which makes sense. I mean, there’s not really an overlap between the two demographics. Although I wonder if they’ll eventually do a site for people who are bi?
Honey´s last blog post…Good News Follows Good News: Or, LinkedIn Works!?
Michael 54
Does Match allow non-subscribers to respond to e-mails (or even read them)?
Match.Com used to allow non-subscribers to read e-mails; they do not do that anymore.
hunter 55
I logged into a “married but looking” site, just out of curiosity…..my profile is half done, I have only been on it 3 weeks, not much effort went into it, I haven’t paid a cent for it, and yet I have 100+ responses from women, and they continue to pile up in my mail box!….
Joe 56
@ hunter #55:
Whoa! Sounds like a gold mine for getting some strange!
@ Michael #54:
So in effect Match is playing bait-and-switch with subscribers who think they are e-mailing people who are reading their missives, but who are effectively “not real” because they can’t read the e-mails.
Jennifer 57
@Joe #52 and Honey# 53- Thanks
Karl R 58
texasdarlin said: (#17)
“I’ve received a wink only to log on and find out the profile’s unavailable.”
I received two winks on Friday. Neither of the profiles are available today (Monday). The first was from a 31 year old who is searching for men from 35-64 years od. The second was from a 30 year old who is searching for men from 32-53 years old. The first lived over 1500 miles away, the second over 800 miles away (I’m searching within 10 miles). Both women were attractive.
I did get a look at the first woman’s profile before it disappeared. She wasn’t terribly picky. She was looking for any man between the ages of 35 and 64 within 50 miles of Los Angeles. It was a New profile, and the text was rather generic.
Even though I’m clearly not a match for her (by her criteria or mine), she somehow ran across my profile and winked at me. This situation makes me suspicious that it may have been a fake profile generated by Match.com to encourage me to continue using them.
“I’ve dated men who have told me they get emails from Russian women a lot.”
I suspect that a number of these are genuine. The women are genuinely seeking US green cards, and the men are a means to an end. I know a middle-aged gentleman who is traveling to the Ukraine next week to meet three women whom he has been corresponding with.
Michael 59
Even though I’m clearly not a match for her (by her criteria or mine), she somehow ran across my profile and winked at me. This situation makes me suspicious that it may have been a fake profile generated by Match.com to encourage me to continue using them.
The profile could have been generated by a scam artist.
On my Cupid.Com account I had received e-mails which had been deleted for violation of their Terms of Use. According to the message, “The most common scams are Nigerian scams asking you to send money”.
I don’t know if that’s the name of the site, but I definitely did read that eHarmony lost a lawsuit and was required to provide access for homosexuals.
The lawsuit should have been dismissed for want of a substantial legal question.
The Internet is a big place, and there is no want for web sites that concentrate on the homosexual niche market.
starthrower68 60
Cilla @ #2,
LOL! Are you sure those aren’t Nigerian internet scammers?
I don’t know that suing is worth it; first how would you prove it and second, I would think the legal fees would exceed any damages awarded. I can’t imagine any jury would award much of a sum for this.
starthrower68 61
BTW, I think someone should start a dating site for scammers to try to out-scam each other.
Michael Ejercito 62
LOL! Are you sure those aren’t Nigerian internet scammers?
They could be Russians.
texasdarlin 63
I have profiles on match, eharmony, & chemistry. I have been active on all three sites since shortly after Valentine’s day. By far, I have had the best success on match. I don’t wink or write emails to anybody who hasn’t been active in the last 24 hrs. Very rarely do I ever get a “thanks, but no thanks” type of email. They either respond because they’re interested or my emails go unanswered. I’ve recently contacted all three by phone for various reasons and all were quick to respond. I’ll admit that my experience with chemistry has been off-putting. Few men respond to my interest, and even fewer show interest. I contacted Chemistry to see what could be done about this and I will have wait to see if it gets any better. My essay and pictures are the same as my match profile so why the problem? My point is this: if somebody’s unhappy with a service that they are paying for usually the company or person providing the service is willing to work with the individual and if all else fails, refund their money. People are more likely to spread bad press than good press & businesses don’t want bad reputations. I don’t know if the gentleman tried to resolve anything with match before litigation, my thought is he’s unhappy & wants some easy money.
downtowngal 64
Suing is a bit extreme, but there’s always more to the story with these things.
Many dating services employ deceptive practices. I had an issue w Chemistry where they automatically renewed my membership, and when you join there’s no option to opt out of “auto renew”, instead you have to cancel but when you do they give you the impression you’ll immediately lose contact w the folks you’re already match with.
My cousin signed up for a personal matchmaking service in NY, only to find out it didn’t live up to is promises (putting it mildly). He then discovered that the NYS Attorney General has guidelines for dating services, i.e. fee limits, etc. and that the folks who ran the service had voilated. Only when he confronted the owner with this was he able to get a refund.
Does this mean people should sue? Probably not, but people get frustrated and these services play on vulnerabilities.
Online dating is much less expensive than a matchmaking service. If enough people grumble states will pass laws so the courts don’t get clogged up with frivilous cases.
Christian Single 65
Geez, what a surprising news! It is my first time to hear with this kind of headline that a member sues a dating site because he was not able to find “the one”.
Kenley 66
After recently having a run in with a corporate giant, I think the only way to get them to stop doing something wrong is to make it about money — they have to be worried that they are going to lose lots of it. The article simply indicates he wants Match.com to remove cancelled memberships, and to stop sending phony winks to keep members active. He is not faulting or blaming Match for real women not writing to him. Maybe the idea of dating sites engaging in misleading and deceptive practices isn’t a big deal to people, but I don’t think it’s a bad thing to force businesses to be moral and ethical — characteristics too many business will happily forsake in order to make more money.
Michael 67
The article simply indicates he wants Match.com to remove cancelled memberships, and to stop sending phony winks to keep members active
Has Match.Com ever sent a phony wink?