The key is in letting go of the image you’ve been holding onto. Because real relationships aren’t about credentials; they’re about connection. And I truly believe there are thousands of people you can potentially be happy with… if only you didn’t have such a rigid idea of what it looked like.
Katie is 58 and never married. Of course. She never wanted to settle.
After rebranding her on Match.com, she’s getting a ton of attention and is being chased down by two men simultaneously.
Tom is the brainy, charismatic one who talks about himself incessantly, sends template emails, and hasn’t followed up in a week.
Bill is a fun guy, makes her laugh, is a great kisser, and has followed up for four dates in two weeks.
Katie wanted to know how to make Tom like her and how to get rid of Bill. When we dug deeper, I learned that she was embarrassed at the thought of introducing her friends to Bob because he wasn’t as “sophisticated” as her other tony Connecticut friends.
I asked Katie, point-blank: Are you attracted to Bill? “Yes”
Real relationships aren’t about credentials; they’re about connection.
Do you have fun around Bill? “Oh, yes!”
Is he consistently good to you? “Absolutely. He’s crazy about me.”
So why are you trying so hard to run away? Because of what your friends think? Because Bill’s not what you’ve pictured in your head for 58 YEARS?
“Yeah, kind of.”
I’m delighted to report that Katie is going out with Bill again. And I wouldn’t be surprised if she “settled” her way into an amazing relationship.
By thinking you’re “better” than everyone who wants you, you’re eliminating the greatest source of love around – the person who wants you! And you may be surprised to find that you can be EXTREMELY happy with someone who doesn’t meet your preconceived image of your ideal mate.
I certainly have been.
Did you find this post thought-provoking? Challenging? Insightful? Then be sure to check out my eBook, “Why He Disappeared – the Smart, Strong, Successful Woman’s Guide to Understanding Men and Keeping the Right One Hooked Forever“.
Why He Disappeared is the smart, strong, successful woman's guide to understanding men. If you want to learn how men think, and rediscover how to have meaningful relationships - all from a man's point of view - click here to learn Why He Disappeared.
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