My main concern is with cultural differences, not racial differences. For example, if your parents are highly educated and you grew up in a middle-class suburban neighborhood, we would probably have a fair amount in common.

If you grew up in radically different circumstances (extremely wealthy family, rural community in the bible belt, hippie commune) we probably wouldn’t have much in common … even if we were of the same racial background.

If you grew up in that mostly caucasian midwest town, then you’re part of the same culture as everyone else there. If you grew up in a different environment, that might not be the case.

“whether my being a Negro girl (38year old girl) in a mostly Caucasian midwest town is likely to mean less dates for me.”

Sure, but it doesn’t matter nearly as much as attractiveness. There have been some studies done (based on speed-dating) that indicate that men don’t discriminate much based on race. They discriminate a lot based on looks.

Admittedly, speed-dating doesn’t mirror the real world, but it bears some resemblence to more conventional dating situations.

Some people may find it odd that I enjoy listening to an ’80′s cover band.

It depends what and how “different” you are, I think. Issues from childhood? Who doesn’t have them? Bipolar? Divorced five times? On the lam? Now we’re getting somewhere …

I wouldn’t necessarily disclose any of those right away, but I wouldn’t wait too long either. Once you see your casual dating is moving in a deeper connection, you need to be honest. And be understanding if the would-be lover decides to opt out (because you wouldn’t really want to be with him/her if that was enough to make him/her flee). You really want someone to accept the all of you, tights and chain mesh notwithstanding.

Now, since I’m perfect, I just don’t have this problem …

Kat Wilder´s last blog post…Is his equal the same as my equal?

Really hunter? The 50-something guys I am referencing had lot’s! of experience – which is how they probably developed a definite preference for certain… ahem…items, positions, practices. Almost to the exclusion of the most common experiences of sexual expression.

Variety may be the spice of life, but when someone *needs* a particular avante -garde thing every time (that does nothing for their partner) then it ceases to be variety. Becomes in fact, more boring than always doing missionary.

Now hand me my whip.