On my first date with a guy at an exhibition:
Me: “Oh, some people are so inquisitive. They ask questions and all that, blah blah.”
Date (ask qns to next available staff): “How does this work? Is this a model XXX?”
Staff:”Yeah. That’s right. It does precisely what it is named for.”
Date (to me): “That staff is unfriendly. I feel stupid.”
Me: “Naw. Its just not his day.” (big smile and got big smile in return)

After that, he told me about some?technical stuff which I totally have no idea. Just Oooh and Ahhh over?them and?keep the smile. Needless to say, I’ve got subsequent dates.?

Either person (male or female) can choose to make more of the concessions in a relationship.

But you can’t make choices for your partner. You can’t make them choose to make more of the concessions. He/she might choose to do so … or maybe not. But it’s not in your control.

You can refuse to be in a relationship where you have to make more than 50% of the concessions. You can refuse to be in a relationship where you have to be making any concessions at all. Your chances of having a successful relationhip will drop, so you need to decide whether that’s an acceptable consequence of not conceding anything to your boyfriend.

Important note:
You’re a lot more likely to notice when you’re making a concession than when someone else is … so you might be counting 100% of the times you concede and only 50% of the times he concedes.

Look around. There are lots of unattractive women with boyfriends, fiancees and husbands.

In some cases, certain men find those women attractive. In other cases, the men focus on one feature that they find attractive and ignore the parts of the visual package that they’re not as attracted to.

If an unattractive woman is trying to get a gorgeous guy, she’ll probably have about as much luck as an unattractive man trying to get a gorgeous woman. If she tries to get someone closer to the same level of attractiveness, she’ll be more successful.

Most importantly, don’t let a poor self-image cripple you. There’s a girl in my dance class (I’ll call her Wallflower). Wallflower is about average attractiveness, but she radiates that she has low self-esteem and a horrible self-image. If she had a positive self-image, a substantial number of men would be attracted to her. As it is, the only men who approach her are the desperate ones … or ones who seek to take advantage of her.

There are less attractive women (older, heavier, worse facial features) that I find much more attractive than wallflower, because these women radiate self-confidence.

When I see couples on the train, not all of them are attractive. There’s beauty and the beast everywhere. Some girls are not pretty, some girls are way fat. But they do managed to get boyfriends.

When I see them, I say to myself: if they can do it, I can do it too!

I’m on the dating scene for more than a year. I was commented to have fat arms by a guy on our first date. Check out the blog post from Evan.? Not many dates in between, but?had been?on our?4th date over the last?weekend with a skinny intellectual?guy. I’m quite happy with our progress.