First, by realizing that they’re probably just doing what makes sense to them. It’s not that they’re bad people; they’re just oblivious to how their methods are coming across.
It’s not that they’re bad people; they’re just oblivious to how their methods are coming across.
Remember: if they’re asking you out, they DO want to please you. So give them a road map. Start by playfully writing something encouraging – yet leads them down the path that YOU want.
What a charming email. It should come as no surprise from a man who works as a bartender at Winky’s Beer Shack. And, although you’re awfully cute, I just don’t give out my number to any ol’ Freddy who rings my bell.
So if you’re up for it, how about you answer these four questions and come up with a few of your own:
Boxers or briefs?
Ginger or MaryAnn?
Longest you ever traveled to go on a date?
Your favorite place on Earth.
Tag. You’re it. Impress me.
I just cranked that out, but you can finesse it with your personality and your questions. As long as your tone is upbeat and playful – instead of stern and lecturing – he’s going to WANT to play along.
Lead him from dating site email to regular email to phone, and you will have accomplished your goal (him investing in you) and he will have accomplished his (getting a phone number).
To take a step back, as much as it’s fun to rip into foolish guys, it’s important to remember that they’re doing the best they can. They just rarely consider how inconsiderate it is to try and rush you into a date.
Oh, and to address your other concern – if you want to get men to write questions, try asking questions and offering stories of your own. Just like a regular conversation. Keep it interesting and lively and see if he can keep up. If he can’t – if he gives you nothing back from your email masterpiece – you have every right to move on.
Successful online dating is all about proper screening. So if guys are too lazy to ask you anything about yourself, they’re just screening themselves out.
I go much further into proper email technique on Disc 4 of Finding the One Online – my comprehensive, 7 hour audio series (with a transcript and workbook), that shows you every single thing you need to learn to have success in a medium where so many others fail.
Click below to learn more about how to manipulate men to do what YOU want them to do…
Why He Disappeared is the smart, strong, successful woman's guide to understanding men. If you want to learn how men think, and rediscover how to have meaningful relationships - all from a man's point of view - click here to learn Why He Disappeared.
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