Comments on: Why the Most Impressive People Struggle in Love

By: Taylor

Taylor — Sat, 02 Jan 2010 08:13:35 +0000

@BTTW , a 5 my friend is doing pretty well .
I’ve just happened upon this website by chance a couple of hours ago. But even if it isn’t solving my problems it’s a source of great amusement and delightful banter. It really has made my day.
This is exactly the topic I was looking for when I typed in my query .
I feel fairly sure that it IS settling . If you can’t be fulfilled , it’s settling .
I’m quite isolated here in Australia. Population 22 million .
Suitable suitors ? Currently zero.
My intense frustration has led me to anxiety and consequently ill health. Although I only became willing to admit the physical was caused by stress after a miserable Christmas where it seemed as though my body was trying to shut itself down.
The issue is , I look fit and healthy . Amazingly so . Not an unsightly curve to be seen but I feel like an old woman . I am 19 with essentially the perfect figure . Toned and ample everywhere I should be an nowhere I shouldn’t .
I will admit my head isn’t bad either. Allowing room for personal preference I could confidently say physically I am 9.5 -10 . As for intellect , 8.5 -10 because I’ll be the first to admit I’ve said some amazingly dimwitted things on occasion and I can be socially inappropriate at times though others I am so perfectly charming and witty nobody would ever no how hard I struggle to be in harmony with others. I can be very funny . I can be a little tedious and intense when the mood strikes to be painfully observant .
Since my career is by nature one of inconsistency , especially being exotic in a country where although the look is embraced , in advertising , it is not always viable to use an exotic minority model when reaching for a certain audience.
Sometimes I am contracted by multi billion dollar corporations to star in their campaigns and some months there is no use for a model that doesn’t fit the general population image . So my career can go from a 6 to a 10 on the whim of the fashion and advertising “season”.
I am always kind , but that is not enough really.
It’s just not and I can’t pretend otherwise. I have a very extensive web of connections but I can’t seem to find a match.
I’m lonely . And really , there aren’t that many people left in Sydney , Australia to meet.
I don’t need a partner to be a ten in physical attractiveness but if you can’t converse and communicate in an effective and enjoyable way how can anybody be satisfied?
98% of the population quite simply can’t keep up. And then I feel as though I’m the rotten one because they’re the majority and they don’t care to be reminded that some things are out of their mental grasp.
What’s a girl to do?

By: LX

LX — Wed, 03 Jun 2009 19:57:25 +0000

I think the main problem with a lot of these “very impressive” people are the fact that they don’t try hard enough, myself included. If I believe I am a great catch, why do I have to put forth that much effort to date a guy, and a guy in a similar situation feels the exact same way. Therefore, it is very hard to pair up the “very impressive” bunch.

By: Miafaru

Miafaru — Tue, 02 Jun 2009 19:04:58 +0000

To me sexual attraction is a priority, as it is hard for me to get easily attracted and stay that way.
If I am attracted then I would risk efforts and time to keep the spark.
I believe I am picky and that lmits my choices. It is a double edge sword to be impressive.

By: Selena

Selena — Sun, 31 May 2009 10:42:58 +0000

Re: #81
“It’s sad but what are you gonna do?”

Carl, have you considered moving to a larger metropolitan area? More women to choose from, particularly if you put yourself out there to meet them.

By: Carl R

Carl R — Sun, 31 May 2009 02:55:36 +0000

yea I agree, I am pretty young 22 educated and pretty intelligent (member of Phi Beta Kappa) and this certainly applies to me!!! Im not exactly a 10 in looks only because I am short (5’6) which really hinders me. Women tell me in pretty handsome but I am short which is frustrating. The town where I am from is considered one of the least educated, most illiterate in the nation so finding the intellectual connection in people is damn near impossible. When I came back from college it was a shock, I was extremely lonely and still am but I really let my standards sink low. I dont care if you have a damn GED, thats good enough for me as long as you look good enough and can hold a somewhat decent conversation. Its sad but what are you gonna do?

By: JuJu

JuJu — Fri, 29 May 2009 05:01:49 +0000

Interesting, now that I think of it, I don’t think I ever was guilty of trying to get an “upgrade” in my online dating escapades.
For me the biggest problem has always been finding someone attractive and interesting enough, but whenever I did, I absolutely gave them a chance.

By: Selena

Selena — Fri, 29 May 2009 01:58:28 +0000

Cilla #68
“In the area of our differences, I don’t think either of us feels we are compromising or settling in the least. Maybe when the right chemistry is there, is doesn’t feel like something’s missing, just that you are a good fit for each other. ”

Yes! Yes! Yes! Yes!

Why is this so difficult for some people to grasp?

By: Mr_Right

Mr_Right — Fri, 29 May 2009 01:13:16 +0000

@JuJu 75 – Really? Well, I’m not surprised, but that’s definitely interesting.

@JuJu 76 – Nope, there ARE a lot of intelligent attractive men/women online. It’s hard to find them though, because I don’t think people look in the right spots. Or rather, they’re not looking correctly.

@Nikita – You seem a lot like my girlfriend… we were walking the mall recently and we went into the Ann Taylor (or rather, she dragged me in), and I noticed she was a size 6, which is interesting, because I have no idea about women’s sizes in the first place. Plus she’s a resident… You know, what you might want to try is eHarmony, where they send you matches, it worked for her (and me). I guess you have to make finding a relationship one of your priorities if you have a busy schedule.

By: Nikita

Nikita — Fri, 29 May 2009 00:17:15 +0000

Impressive may be the wrong word to use. However, I agree with the general principle. I am a doctor doing my residency now. I passed my exams at an early point in my career, I have my own apartment and am about to get my first sports car. I'm a size 6 and attractive. But for some reason, I'm also single. I dated extensively during my house jobs. I partied and didn't open a single textbook the whole year. Then I decided I wanted to do surgery. My head got stuck in the books. I fell into a bad relationship and went on a boy fast for 6 months which then extended into 12 months. I got so caught up in work that I didn't leave any time for socialising. I leave by 7 am and get home at 10 pm. Weekends off are precious and just used to recuperate from the hectic week. On-calls show no signs of abating. Somehow, with work and trying to be the best in the game, I've forfeited my love life. Sometimes it's just because the most "impressive" people just put other things ahead of love and relationships. Perhaps I will regret this when I'm 40 years but at the moment, all I want to do is be the best at my work. Nikita´s last blog post...One of those days

By: JuJu

JuJu — Thu, 28 May 2009 23:55:44 +0000

Mr. Right said: “Because, let’s be honest, there are a LOT of attractive intelligent women online. ”

Really? I’d never guess. I actually think those are few and far between.

It’s the same as with men – there may be a decent amount of attractive men online, and may even be – of intelligent ones. But intelligent AND attractive – those are hard to come by.