Are the People That You Want To Meet Online More Physically Attractive Than You Are?


Are the people that you want to meet online more physically attractive than you are?

Please respond in the comments below.

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  1. 21
    Alice Wiley

    WOAH!!! Who says women don’t want to date hot men?

    To answer the question, no, I don’t try to date people more attractive than me. But I am really hot. And I definitely don’t want to date people less attractive.

  2. 22

    I don’t think I’ve ever stopped myself from contacting a man because I thought he was too attractive for me. I consider myself attractive, but most men my age are simply no longer in the “hot” category, and that’s okay with me. I tend to be attracted more to interesting looking men than to guys with classic good looks. I don’t need a Ken doll. And, as others have said here, if a man has a great personality, he becomes more attractive to me the more I get to know him. Chemistry is a tricky thing, but I much prefer an average-looking guy who is interesting, kind, and funny to a good looking guy who’s either boring, shallow, arrogant, or self-centered.

  3. 23

    I think, all men would want to date at least one “hot” female.

  4. 24

    on post #13,

    I have had men come up and talk to my “hot” date, almost as, if I am not there. These women have handled the situation very well…..

  5. 25

    I have no problem considering a man who is “hotter” than me, but usually when I read his profile after being lured in with his pic, I find there’s no there there, if you know what I mean, just vapid nonsense. I think so many of these men have been able to ride on their looks that they see no reason to post any kind of substantive profile. If it keeps working for them, I guess they see no reason to change it, especially the ones who are not interested in long-term relationships and just want casual physical connections. I don’t read women’s profiles very often, but I suspect the same practice goes on with the 10’s in that gender.

    BTW, I used to never contact a man whom I thought was hotter than me, even if I did manage to find a great profile attached. This summer, however, I took a few chances and wound up dating men whom I thought were 9’s and 10’s (and judging from their website stats, so did other women). When you polled your readers about their own looks, Evan, I think I put myself down as a hard-won 7, and still think often of myself as a 7 or 8. But those handsome guys I dated recently? All of them told me unsolicited that I was “hot,” “gorgeous,” “a 10 in my book,” etc.

    I think many women tend to underestimate their attractiveness, for one thing. For another, I think I have relied too much on the opinions of other women to derive my sense of good looks. (Do we sabotage each other out of unconscious competition, or do we just have different standards than men?) The last man I dated told me he couldn’t believe I didn’t think I was a knockout, that I absolutely oozed sex appeal. I’ve heard that from other men–perhaps it’s just something only the opposite sex can see in me? I’ve always believed that being comfortable in one’s own skin adds to one’s sexiness–now I believe it more than ever. And of course, beauty is still eternally in the eye of the beholder…

  6. 26

    I don’t try to date men that are prettier than I am. I am looking for someone who is living an interesting and adventuresome life. I have dated hotties and they do get tired of the attention they get because of their looks because it is superficial and not about who they are as people.

    But–it is fun to see a man enjoy the little ego boost he gets when the heads of other men turn because he is with me. Men like that a lot and it’s fun at the time and also doesn’t mean much in the bigger picture.

    Give me a guy with some confidence and intelligence—now that is hot!

  7. 27

    I’d contact a guy if I liked his profile regardless of whether he is hotter than me or not. But if he were really hot… bonus! I’ve met just as many shallow guys who were average looking so I’m not as certain that good looks indicate a lack of character.

    So I think its probably a 50-50 for me. Though, if I’m going to be completely honest, while I’m good at judging character… I may not be as good of a judge on whether other people (or he) would consider himself more attractive than me. Take for instance the last two guys I dated seriously… they were both really good looking but were they hotter than me? I honestly don’t know… I know we were mutually attracted to each other. I know they were good people…

  8. 28

    Wow, all the hot and sexy women on this website make me feel like such a loser. And, unfortunately, there is nothing I can do to go from a 5 to a 10 — damn those inferior genes! Perhaps on-line dating really is only for younger, beautiful people.

  9. 29
    The Inbetweener

    In terms of “looks” my height alone (5’5-5’6) makes me “unattractive” to most females that I find attractive – no matter how great a personality I have (or think I have). MOST women are just not willing to compromise on that issue. So, I feel that it’s only right that I NOT concentrate on “looks” so much as to personality. Which ultimately, matters more to me in the long run anyway.

  10. 30

    hhhhmmmhhhh, ok, Where did I hear that most confident, intelligent men are Wealthy and live in the neighborhoods? LOL!………

  11. 31

    ….they live in the nicer neighborhoods?….

  12. 32

    ….he, he, he,…hhhmmhh, single,confident and intelligent women that live in nice neighborhoods are out there!…..somewhere…LOL!…

  13. 33

    I’ve dated men who were better looking, less good looking and equal. All has to do with chemistry – the man I was most attracted to was less attractive. Ever hear of this quote – Some men love with their eyes but most women love with their ears!!

  14. 34

    to Anna on post #33,

    According to therapists, the larger pool of single women, no longer select men with their ears……..

  15. 35

    Well Anna most women MAY “love with thier ears” but they “like with their eyes” (especially online…lol) and if they don’t “LIKE” what they see
    they can care less what you have to say.<– I’m talking about mainly online dating here.

  16. 36

    WOW, this can be a sore subject with some people! I do think men have a different prspective than women do on this subject. I would say that i do not specifically seek women that are hotter than me. I go after women that i’m attracted to and think they might be on the same level as i am. I think one person being much hotter than the other person can be a recipe fo disaster. It can lead to bad feelings. But as a guy i would like to know when i do email a woman who i think i would be compatible with, what’s the reason for her lack of interest. Sometimes i do wonder that maybe i’m shooting above my head as far as looks goes. I think that’s natural for anyone. I have been told that i am a goodlooking guy, and i do keep myself in good shape so maybe it’s just a matter of taste. Maybe we all overthink this whole thing and if we learn to relax and comunicate honestly with each other, someone special will come along. Like it’s been said many times, it’s all a numbers game!

  17. 37

    I’m feeling compelled to respond to Lulubell’s comments. First of all i do agree that unattractive, fat, out of shape men have no business emailing attractive, fit, fun women. Let’s be honest here, society tells us that a match like this will not work. It would be the exception not the rule. As far as the age issue goes, i’m a 45 year old man who has been told that i’m goodlooking, probably a 7-8, and i keep myself in good shape. I usually date women in their late 30’s only due to the fact that women my age seem so old. They look much older than me, act much older than me, and we have little in common. I actually would prefer to date a woman my age. We grew up during the same time period so we would have had the same experiences. And then there is the kids issue. Women in their 30′ have kids that are very young and it can be difficult finding some quiet time together. Women my age have older kids that are either out of the house or high school age so getting away for a spotaneous weekend can be a reality. I have recently made a concious effort to find women my age or older that would be compatible. So for me i would say that dating a younger woman isn’t an ego issue. It’s just has been a matter of taste

  18. 38
    The Inbetweener

    Is beauty not in the eye of the beholder?

    Is it not also how one perceives beauty?

    What does “less or more attractive” really mean anyway?

    You might see someone as a “9” – I might see that same someone as a “7” and they might see themselves as a “5”, but when they open up their mouth to speak, that number could change.

    Does anyone concur?

  19. 39

    Interesting topic. I think there are many many many more women out there that “keep themselves up” than men. I also consistently see couples on the street where the man looks much less attractive than his woman. There is a constant refrain from men that they are so, “young at heart,” or, “young for my age,” that they *need* to date down–someone ten years their junior, at least. For this reason they also defend manipulating their age in their profile. I’m sure women use this rationale and strategy as well, but I think much less often. My experience with persons older than myself, btw, is the women get way wackier and funner and the men get grumpier and less fun…I believe they’ve actually done studies on this.

    Personally I don’t get it, because the common generational experiences are so great, if looking to partner for keeps. I know when I’ve dated younger men (6-9 years younger) there’s a sort of, “generation gap.” Sometimes I think men are more afraid of their own mortality, and this is the root of pursuing the babes. If they can look at “young” in their mind they still are young. But it doesn’t help that statistically men don’t last as long. After going to all the work of finding a mate, I don’t want to be alone again, prematurely.

    Those are just my thoughts…


  20. 40

    In my personal experience, the men who claim to look younger than their age (and some are convinced they look 15-20 younger – why, I can’t possibly determine) are all grossly deluded. Some of them, in fact, even looked older than their age.

    Both sexes, I think, should leave it to other people to judge how old or young they appear.

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