How Many Emails Do The Most Attractive Women Get Online?

pretty woman relaxing on the bed with her laptop

In preparation for my free teleclass next Tuesday, I’m going to be asking two new online questions each day and would greatly appreciate your responses. With your participation, I think we can all learn something fundamental about online dating. So here’s my first question:

How many emails do you think the most attractive women in their 20’s and 30’s get per a week on a major dating site?

Please respond in the comments below.

Talk to you soon!


P.S. Don’t worry – our regular Thursday reader questions will still be answered as long as I’m in town.

Join our conversation (308 Comments).
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  1. 241

    My brother’s girlfriend is in her late twenties and very attractive.   She went two months while dating my brother where she didn’t check her OKCupid account.   She had over three thousand messages when she went to deactivate it.

    I bet ninety percent of the guys are messaging every beautiful woman they see if she has a profile you can actually read and have something to reply to (aka not an “Ask me…” in the description). The other ten percent are just scared of rejection even online.


    So good luck out there guys.   Personally I don’t touch the apps and websites.   I meet women in friend groups, gym classes, bars sometimes, etc.   Just talk to women and remember they’re flawed people too.   Don’t judge but don’t put them on a pedestal because they won the gene pool lottery.

  2. 242
    Jacob Judy

    Probably a 100 a day. Good luck conversation with them.

  3. 243

    It is interesting that nearly all of the female replies to this thread rate themselves in the upper 25% on looks.   While it is true that women get 1000x the attention that men do, it is also true that this attention tends to warp self-perception of ones own looks.

    I’ve also confirmed that has an internal “attractiveness” index they use to screen the profiles that you see.   They will show you a wall of attractive photos if you aren’t a subscriber.   Once you sign up for a plan, compare the photos you see in Search to those you saw before.   Its a completely different group of people.

  4. 244

    I think it depends on how approachable your profile is and pictures. I do t have too many selfies and I have both face and full body pics. I’m attractive and 55 and I can barely keep up with the number of messages I get much less likes. In 2 days I got about 30 messages so I imagine if I was in my 20-30’s it would be triple that. I get all ages. The younger ones as young as 20 straight up ask for a hook up. I tend to date about 10 years younger.

  5. 245

    I just went onto and ourtime and I got over 900 messages in about an hour and a half

    It definitely overwhelmed me and I paused my profile on both.

    i am a 58 year old female and put 1 photo on of just my face.

    Not sure I want to unpause


  6. 246

    I got 500+ mails in a week. I wonder if they are real people or bots.

  7. 247

    *Wow* what a great study, thanks for initiating it and to everyone who added their two cents. 65 YO Male here been single for a year and prob got 200 winks, “want to meet” and messages (in a year). Tyrone, you are spot on, met one gal on Match who told me she expected to be taken care of. Last conversation we had by the by. Met a few others like that and a few with serious personality disorders. My read is it’s a shot in the dark in a very dark room.

  8. 248
    Michelle Hutt

    I’ve been on match for one full day and have 82 conversations waiting, 247 views and 189 likes.

  9. 249

    I know women on dating websites, friends of mine. They say they get anywhere from 50 to 200 per week. Most from legit men (don’t confuse “legit” with “good”, another words, they’re real, not bots). And then there’s me. I have been on several dating websites for over 12 years. In the past 12 years, I have sent an estimated of 20,000 messages to women (desperation? Probably not… the women are just to self absorbed to respond, so I have to keep trying). I generally receive about .1 percent (yes, that was POINT one percent) response to the messages I send. For every ONE THOUSAND messages I send, I generally get one response from a legit woman. The others are just bots that want me to “verify my age with a credit card”, “verify my identity with a credit card”, “pay for sex”, “visit this porn website”, etc.

    1. 249.1
      Evan Marc Katz

      Maybe you need a new approach.

  10. 250

    I’m in my late 40s and what society considers conventionally attractive. However, I’m certainly not for many as I’m divorced with 3 kids at home. I get about 30-50 messages per day.

  11. 251

    I did an expertiment too. I put a very attractive guys picture on tinder and barely any information. Got tons of likes and woman actually sent messages without me lifting a finger. The ones I swiped right always always liked back. Only thing women are interested in are very attractive guys. That’s all that matters. You could be dirt poor living with your mom. Women would take care of you and take you out of that situation. But only if you are very attractive. They are the same as men looks is all that matters.

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