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Sex

“Men look for sex and find love.” If you disagree, you still don’t understand how sex is the primary driver for men. Essentially, men fall for you during the process of pursuing sex with you. Which means that if you have sex before you get into a relationship with him, you’re taking a predictably high risk that things aren’t going to work out. Click below to understand how men think about sex; you will be forever empowered.

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Find out what my blog can do for you, and what type of man becomes a dating coach for women.

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Who Enjoys Casual Sex?

Lots has been written about casual sex and the hookup culture – to the point where it has to be very confusing for people to navigate the booty call waters…

Read More… 115 comments

Men Look for Sex and Find Love. Women Look for Love and Find Sex.

Hi Evan, I’ve been online dating for a while now, and I’ve started to notice a trend with a lot of the men who have contacted me. By way of…

Read More… 518 comments

Why Women Should Make Men Wait For Sex – Part II

I’ve only done this twice before: once, in a post defending Lori Gottlieb’s “Marry Him,” and a second time, in a post explaining my opposition to Rori Raye’s “Circular Dating.”…

Read More… 255 comments

Can a Hot Woman Like Me Hold Out on Sex Until I Get a Commitment?

Can a Hot Woman Like Me Hold Out on Sex Until I Get a Commitment?

I’m a 31-year old woman, and have been dating a lot but have had little success. I’d say I’m in the very attractive category and have no trouble getting casual…

Read More… 249 comments

Is Sex on the Third Date the New Normal?

Is Sex on the Third Date the New Normal?

Evan, to say I’m frustrated with dating right now is an understatement! During the past six months, almost EVERY man I’ve gone out with expects sex by the third date.…

Read More… 330 comments

Why Men Should Say No to Sex

I’d like to hear your take on how a guy can smoothly handle the condom issue early in the dating relationship (assuming things get hot and heavy on the first…

Read More… 83 comments

Why You Shouldn’t Have Sex With Your Friends – Or Should You?

You saw “When Harry Met Sally…” but have you lived it? I have. Once had a wicked crush on my best friend from eleventh grade. Lost touch, got back in touch,…

Read More… 22 comments

If I Have Herpes, How Can I Tell The New Guy I’m Dating?

Hi Evan – Really enjoy your blog. I found out a few months ago that I have herpes. After going through the normal flip out and that my dating life…

Read More… 380 comments

I Think Sex Is Wrong Outside Marriage. Why Won’t Anyone Date Me?

Dear Evan, I keep losing relationships when I say that sex isn’t right outside of a marriage. I used to think that women have more self-control than men, but have…

Read More… 276 comments

Are Some Fantasies Better Kept A Fantasy?

Are Some Fantasies Better Kept A Fantasy?

My husband wants me to have an affair and has fantasized about it for the last 5 of our 10 years together. He gets turned on at the mere thought…

Read More… 139 comments
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  • "Adrian, are you planning a blind date? It somewhat sounds like you know absolutely nothing about the woman you're trying to plan a date with. Either that, or we are totally misunderstanding wha…"
    sylvana on What Do I Say to a Guy on the Phone If I Don’t Want to Go Out With Him?
  • "Yes, I know the US it not New York. I said 'like' Central Park. It was an example. I'm not going to go on Google maps and list out all the big/well known parks across the US. People were murdered…"
    Marika on What Do I Say to a Guy on the Phone If I Don’t Want to Go Out With Him?
  • "Adrian I'm sorry if it bothered you. I stand by what I said though, I think SE, Nissa and I aren't being overly positive at all - the particular statement bothers me because I strongly disagree. In…"
    Marika on What Do I Say to a Guy on the Phone If I Don’t Want to Go Out With Him?
  • "Hi Nissa, Sylvana, and SparklingEmerald, I fear that each of you have missed my and I believe ScottH's point. All the things you all mentioned are actually great and I agree with them when they…"
    Adrian on What Do I Say to a Guy on the Phone If I Don’t Want to Go Out With Him?
  • "Agree with you here, Mrs Happy. I work with kids, I had step kids while I was married, I have many nephews and nieces, and I'm one of 4 kids myself. My parents, my ex-husband, my siblings and a hig…"
    Marika on The Best Way to Stop Your Relationship From Getting Stale
  • "@Mrs Happy: (High-five from another woman who does math for fun)…"
    AdaGrace on The Best Way to Stop Your Relationship From Getting Stale
  • "OMG. I thought I had a knight in shining armour who stood by me when I was sick for many months. I got back on my feet after a  month I was discharged from hospital doing part-time and earning 1800…"
    Nanana on My Boyfriend Wants Me to Get A Higher Degree And Earn More Money.
  • ""And parks are open spaces with lots of people (presuming it’s a landmark type park like Central Park, I doubt the suggestion is to meet up in a kids’ play area). How are you getting killed??"…"
    Noone45 on What Do I Say to a Guy on the Phone If I Don’t Want to Go Out With Him?

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    "Since working with you, I am happy, content, less anxious, more compassionate, more understanding, more patient, loving."

    I learned from you something revelatory: men want to make women happy. Sometimes they don’t know how to do that, but my boyfriend really wants to make me happy…

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    "Working with Evan has helped me to really value myself and to be myself when I am dating. This is priceless."

    Look, I can say I feel more confident than ever before but it’s more than that. Working with Evan has helped me to really value myself and to be myself when I am dating. This is priceless. It’s not perfect but I have come a thousand miles from where I was and feel so lucky.

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    “Without your help, I never could have imagined that I could be in a relationship like this one.”

    I'm in my 60's and expected that I would not have a committed relationship again. I'm still dealing with issues internally of fear and past experiences, as is he. But we can talk about these things and know that we have something special.

    Ann S.
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    "Your email gave me new motivation to be open to new possibilities that didn't fit in my box."

    He makes me feel special, goes out of his way for me, doesn't keep me guessing about whether I'll hear from him, gives me his full attention.

    Jeannie R.
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    "I finally know what it’s like to be relaxed in a relationship. I can only thank you and the women of the Inner Circle."

    You always did tell it like it is. I have to say thank you for believing in me, and giving me confidence I didn’t know I had. Thank you for seeing that there was something to be seen in me, that I didn’t even know existed.

    Sahaja P.

Have a Dating Question? Search My Date-A-Base.

If you’re looking to answer your most pressing dating and relationship question, my blog is like Google for your love life!

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