Are You a Narcissist? Evidently, I Am!

So here I am, reading my New York Times on Sunday, when I come across a piece by Arthur C. Brooks. Along with David Brooks (not related), they are two of the few conservative columnists for the Grey Lady, and, for my money, they are the two most thought-provoking writers as well. Instead of delving into strictly politics, both Brookses focus on the foibles and inconsistencies of human behavior, which I find personally fascinating as a dating coach.

The rise of Donald Trump has inspired a thousand thinkpieces, but Brooks’ latest on narcissism gave me food for thought.

“If our egos are obese with amour-propre, social media can indeed serve up the empty emotional carbs we crave. Instagram and the like doesn’t create a narcissist, but studies suggest it acts as an accelerant — a near ideal platform to facilitate what psychologists call “grandiose exhibitionism.” No doubt you have seen this in others, and maybe even a little of it in yourself as you posted a flattering selfie — and then checked back 20 times for “likes.”

A healthy self-love that leads to true happiness is what Rousseau called “amour de soi.” It builds up one’s intrinsic well-being, as opposed to feeding shallow cravings to be admired. Cultivating amour de soi requires being fully alive at this moment, as opposed to being virtually alive while wondering what others think. The soulful connection with another person, the enjoyment of a beautiful hike alone (not shared on Facebook) or a prayer of thanks over your sleeping child (absent a #blessed tweet) could be considered expressions of amour de soi.”

I wrestle with this a lot. Put bluntly, I do not like social media. I don’t get the point of Twitter. I refuse to get on Instagram. I don’t want to post photos of my kids for strangers to see. You’ll notice I never use their names, nor the name of my wife in anything I write. I am a private person who happens to have a public job. I would much rather be rich than famous. When I was in Project Greenlight in 2001, I was actually afraid of winning – that’s how much I didn’t want to star in an HBO documentary, directing my own movie, with my flaws on display for the world.

Put bluntly, I do not like social media. And yet here I am: 57,000 Facebook fans, 11,700 Twitter followers…

And yet here I am: 60,000 Facebook fans, 12,000 Twitter followers, and a new Love U podcast/YouTube channel that I’ve just launched. And I’m ambivalent about all of it. I love to share my opinions and am willing to share personal stories if they can help you find love, but cringe at the idea of being “that guy” – the one who posts selfies of him and the Dalai Lama or Richard Branson with the hashtag #blessed.

Then I got to the end of Brooks’ anti-narcissist diatribe:

First, take the Narcissistic Personality Inventory test. If you got a “great score” like my son’s friend, perhaps it’s time to reflect a little. Ask, “Is this the person I want to be?”

Second, get rid of the emotional junk food that is feeding any unhealthy self-obsession. Make a list of opinions to disregard — especially those of flatterers and critics — and review the list each day. Resolve not to waste a moment trying to impress others, but rather to treat them (and yourself) with kindness, whether it is earned or not.

Third, go on a social media fast. Post to communicate, praise and learn — never to self-promote. What have you got to lose? Only your distorted, reflected self.

Well, I can’t go on a social media fast. Sorry, I have a business to run.

I do disregard the opinions of critics (and take the flatterers in stride).

I don’t spend time trying to impress others, and generally go the extra mile to be kind. So I’ve got that going for me. Which is nice.

The one thing I hadn’t done is take the Narcissistic Personality Inventory test. So I did.

Here are my results

Yes, my narcissism scores were in the 70th percentile. I’m not terribly surprised. But in my defense, it is an unusual and seemingly flawed test.

  1. Narcissism tracks really highly with confidence.
  2. If you take the test, you’ll see that you’re forced to choose between two options, neither of which represent what you actually think. Ex.

    “I insist on getting the respect that’s due me” vs. “I usually get the respect that I deserve.”

3. There are other questions where I felt both answers were true:

   “I am more capable than other people” vs “I think there’s a lot I can learn from other people.”

   “The thought of ruling the world scares the hell out of me” vs “If I ran the world, it would be a better place.”

I gave the test to some women in my Love U Course and the results were all over the map. Women who scored highly, like me, immediately went into damage control mode.

I got a 27. Yep, a 27.

As a therapist, I have to say that true narcissism has NOTHING to do with confidence. Or self love. It’s one of the most misused concepts in our culture that most therapists worth their salt get really annoyed at.

There’s an important part of the myth that never gets talked about. That’s Echo. Narcissus wasn’t falling in love with himself. Echo showed him himself and he fell in love with Echo. When she disappeared, he felt that he CEASED TO EXIST. So a truly “narcissistic” person is riddled with self doubt and low self-esteem. They literally feel they cease to exist if they are not perfectly mirrored.

So a narcissistic person makes it all about them because their ego cannot handle not being mirrored. This is the opposite of confidence and the opposite of self – love. The narcissist hides behind the false self that acts like it’s the best thing in the world, a leader, the top of the heap. But not too far beneath the surface, the narcissist does not believe they are worth anything. That’s why if you don’t mirror them, they get wicked pissed off.

I am confident and I do love myself, but please please, do not confuse narcissism with confidence. It’s fake confidence that’s as flimsy as a paper mask. Evan, if you were narcissistic, you’d never be able to do this work. You would never be able to handle all the criticism you get. You’d only continue with your work as long as people told you you were great.

People with narcissistic personality disorder are wounded, sad, fearful, and stuck at about age 2.

People who are highly confident (and may score high on this test) are probably….highly confident and yes, a bit full of themselves. 

What she said. 🙂

Your thoughts, below, are always greatly appreciated.

 

Join our conversation (35 Comments).
Click Here To Leave Your Comment Below.

Comments:

  1. 1
    KK

    My understanding of NPD is that they have some of the same qualities as sociopaths, in that they are unable to empathize with others. They also have difficulty in intimate relationships. Not so much difficulty for them but they seem to go through a pattern of idealizing, devaluing, and ultimately discarding their love interest. People that marry and divorce 3+ or more times are likely candidates.

    1. 1.1
      Lady

      OR they are repeat victims of such abusers.

  2. 2
    Julie

    Hi Evan,

    Narcissists come in all shapes and sizes.  Just like men.  Just like women.  Here is another one of them, including another “test” that takes a different approach.

    http://blogs.scientificamerican.com/beautiful-minds/23-signs-youe28099re-secretly-a-narcissist-masquerading-as-a-sensitive-introvert/

    There is the shy/covert/vulnerable narcissist, the overt narcissist (the confident, ahem, grandiose narcissist), and then there are the common subtypes–the delusional, the somatic, the cerebral (who take great pride in their, ahem, intellect, are incredibly, ahem, convincing, are highly manipulative and often come across as charming), and of course there are the malignant narcissists on up to the sociopaths and psychopaths.  There are other subtypes, too.  And if you understand them you’ll see there are indeed many, many nuances that look like one personality characteristic but are decidedly another.  In addition, one of the simplest ways to find out if someone is a narcissist?  Just ask them!

    To use generalizations that skim only the surface of a deeply complex continuum, (healthy narcissism, vs. narcissistic personality disorder, for example) is to introduce a deeply serious subject here and not do it justice, especially in the area of online dating where it can have devastating consequences.   Credibility as a dating coach for smart, strong, successful women?  Absolutely.  Credibility in areas of psychology such as narcissism?  Well…..

     

    You may respond by saying you’re not a psychologist, and that’s ok.  However, when you venture off into real psychological issues you venture off the path of what you do best.

    Some people, oddly enough, openly admit to being a narcissist.  And yet, they themselves can’t recognize the programming that is really running their lives beyond what they say and what they do.  That’s because narcissists are but one thing:  unconscious.

    1. 2.1
      KK

      Not sure what the harm is in talking about serious subjects that we can all relate to and learn from.

    2. 2.2
      Rampiance

      I think it’s an excellent service to do as Evan did and alert people to the tools out there and how those tools can be interpreted or misinterpreted. This particular tool seems a bit full of itself, actually, and might mislead some otherwise healthy people into wasting their time pursuing remedies for a so-called narcissism that is not unhealthy for them.

  3. 3
    Social Media Melody

    “And yet here I am: 60,000 Facebook fans, 12,000 Twitter followers, and a new Love U podcast/YouTube channel that I’ve just launched. And I’m ambivalent about all of it. I love to share my opinions and am willing to share personal stories if they can help you find love, but cringe at the idea of being “that guy” – the one who posts selfies of him and the Dalai Lama or Richard Branson with the hashtag #blessed.”

    But, Evan, your 60,000 FB fans and 12,000 Twitter followers aren’t following YOU. They’re following your business, your brand, and what you’re marketing. That’s the difference.

    I’m with you – in most cases, I don’t like social media. However, there are some instances where social media can be a great tool. For instance, I think social media is great for business people to use as a means of promoting their business and brand. It’s also great for promoting awareness of causes.

    Where social media goes awry is when people use it to try and get something online that they’re not getting in their real lives. For instance, a woman feels insecure about her physical attractiveness. So she regularly posts selfies and checks back constantly for likes so that she can receive the validation she craves that she really is an attractive, hot, desirable woman after all.

    Another example: people want recognition. They desperately want other people to believe that they really are successful, funny, cool, smart and lead interesting lives. If they really do have these qualities, it’s not enough for them to believe these things about themselves. They have to receive public validation and adoration from people. So they take very selective photos (usually after about a dozen or more tries) of something that they think highlights one of these qualities, and then they post it online.

    Or, they make a smug posting on social media about something they or their family member/partner/friend/child did. They then wait for the likes to pour in; relish the instant boost of their ego, and then repeat. It’s an endless cycle that becomes very addictive. And destructive.

    I used to date a guy that had a great body due to the three hours every night he spent lifting weights in the gym. He was always posting shirtless selfies of himself on social media. I asked him why he did this. He said, “I work hard. I want to show that off.” I asked him why – why did he feel like he needed approval from strangers? Wasn’t it enough for YOU to know that you’re fit and strong? Why do you feel the need have others comment about your fitness and level of strength? After a lot of back and forth on this, he finally admitted that he craved the attention he knew his body pics would get him. He was insecure, so he used social media to try and fill his insecurities.

    That’s what I hate about social media. Every single one of us has a long list of insecurities. Lots of them. And social media is designed to seek out those insecurities in each of us, and blow them up like an ever-expanding balloon. I know so many people that have a lot of problems in their life that are rooted in their social media behavior – myself included.

    Here’s what happened to me:

    I had always thought of myself as a pretty well-adjusted individual. But then I recognized awhile ago that social media wasn’t for me.

    Social media became, for me, a way that I would try to take shortcuts to get the things I thought I really wanted in life (beauty, attention, validation from people, success and popularity) – but that I didn’t have because I was too lazy to work for them.

    Rather than working through and within myself to change what I didn’t like and to work for what I didn’t have, I looked to the masses on social media to fill those voids within myself. I didn’t even realize I was doing it. It happened over a long period of time.

    I had an epiphany with social media when I realized that I could never measure up to the highly contrived images that people post about themselves and their lives on FB and Instagram. I decided I was tired of trying to live up to something that wasn’t even real.

    Even when I knew I shouldn’t compare myself and my life to the images I was seeing on Facebook and Instagram, I still did. It was impossible not to see the supposedly great lives and experiences that my social media “friends” were living, and not think that there was something seriously wrong with me because I didn’t have those things.

    It became a vicious cycle for me.

    Soon I was spending insane amounts of time every single day trying to come up with something I could post online that would be funny, smart, and cool enough that it would get me a ton of likes. I was terrified of posting something that received no likes or comments, because then that would mean that people didn’t think I was funny or interesting. In fact, if that happened (and it did), it would ruin my day because I would feel rejected by the world.

    I became obsessed with trying to portray myself on social media has having this perfect life – complete with all of the witty postings that took me hours to come up with, the endless attention-getting “beauty” selfies, and the constant “living it up” photos that I would always post with the hashtag #blessed (note to all social media users: When you use the hashtag #blessed, you really just want to brag while appearing humble. Just remember that everyone can see right through that, and they’ll think you really ARE the narcissist that you deny being).

    Inwardly and privately, though, my social media behavior began to take over my life. I couldn’t go longer than 10 minutes without checking social media for fear that I would miss out on something. I would spend hours doing my hair and makeup just so I could spend the next hour or so taking selfie after selfie until I finally took a pic that captured that perfect look.

    I would loudly announce to people that I never compared myself with anyone, and that I didn’t care what anyone thought of my social media postings. After all, I said, I posted what I posted because I wanted to, and not for the benefit of anyone else.

    The truth was that all I did was compare myself to others. And I really did care what people thought about me. I cared too much. We all do. If we didn’t care what people thought of the things we post, then we wouldn’t be on social media at all.

    When I went out for a meal with anyone, I immediately had to post a picture of that experience online lest anyone think I was just sitting at home by myself in my sweatpants.

    I would purposely plan to do specific things just so that I could post about on social media, thus generating a storm of likes and the envy of my followers.

    I would walk into fancy stores that I couldn’t afford to buy ANYTHING in. Once inside the store, I would pick out something (an outfit or a purse) and try it on in front of the mirror for the sole purpose of being able to post a photo of myself with the merchandise.

    In reality, I made a modest income. But it wasn’t enough for me. I had to show people that I liked nice things, and that I deserved them, and that (supposedly) I could afford to buy them for myself. I desperately craved validation from other people that I was in fact beautiful, smart, successful, funny, cool and interesting… a catch in every way.

    It didn’t take very long before I had turned into a very shallow and petty person who put my own needs above everyone else’s. Appearances became EVERYTHING to me. Because appearances were the only way that I knew of to prove that somehow, I was good enough.

    The tipping point came when I almost had a mental breakdown due to trying to maintain this huge social media facade… a facade that I felt like I could never live up to, and that had made me so deeply unhappy with myself, my life, and my priorities.

    So I quit social media cold turkey. I began living my life the old-fashioned way. It was the best decision I’ve ever made.

    Gone now is the narcissism, shallowness, and pettiness that I used to indulge in while constantly trying to one-up everyone else because everyone else was constantly trying to one-up me.

    I worked with a therapist to gain some real self esteem so that never again will I allow myself to be exploited by something the way that I allowed social media to exploit my weaknesses and vulnerabilities.

    At the height of my social media frenzy, I had several thousand FB friends and almost a million Instagram followers. Today, I still have a relationship with two of those people that were friends with me on FB. As for my former Instagram followers, they’re all out my life now. Funny. I don’t even miss them. And I don’t that’s how friendship is supposed to work.

    In hindsight, I don’t know why I waited so long to quit social media. I also don’t know why I ever thought that it was adding anything positive to my life.

    We say that social media is convenient, and that it helps us to keep in touch with people we would not otherwise talk to. But I think that’s just an excuse for us to get out of doing the work that really needs to be done to build the effective relationships that we all say we really want in life.

    Now I’m dating a great guy. Neither of us is on social media. I love it! We don’t have to argue about whether or not he should “like” a friend’s bikini pic on Instagram. I don’t have to get upset that he hasn’t changed his status on Facebook to “In a Relationship with (me).” Neither of us feel any pressure to post photos of our love on social media to see how many likes we get. Neither of us has to get upset that the other person didn’t “like” or comment on our postings. Neither of us feels any need to convince dozens and dozens and dozens of “friends” – most of whom we never talk to – that we are in fact smart, funny, cool, and interesting, with a great life to boot.

    Instead, we get to actually INTERACT with each other and the others in our lives. We get to have the kinds of moments that ignite love, respect, and mutual bonds for a lifetime. It takes more work this way. But it’s the best work I’ve ever done. I’ve never been happier.

    And best of all, I got MYSELF back. I hated who I had become as a result of living in the comparison culture. That did nothing for me other than impose a life on me that wasn’t mine; and never would be mine because I would always have to live that life strictly for the benefit of other people that didn’t know about me and didn’t care about me.

    Now I know who I really am, and what’s important to me. And the only comparison I’m interested in making anymore is to look at where I was then with where I am now.

    For what it’s worth, there’s absolutely no comparison.

     

     

     

     

  4. 4
    Christine

    It’s hard for me to say since I don’t know you personally–but at least from what what I do know about you, I wouldn’t classify you as a narcissist Evan.  I’m not a psychologist by any means, but I think of narcissism as more than just being full of yourself.  Part of narcissism is a complete lack of empathy.  However, you  do show empathy for your clients and for other good, sincere people looking for love.

    I also think of narcissists as being manipulative as well.  When I was with a toxic ex (who I really do think was a narcissist, from all I’ve read on the subject)–I always got this nasty feeling that he was praising me to my face and stabbing me in the back (from the inconsistency of his words vs. his actions).  Well, people can say whatever they want about you, but they can’t say you don’t speak your mind!  In fact, you strike me as being far too honest to manipulate anyone and play the sort of deceitful mind games narcissists typically play.

    I usually like the New York Times but don’t think this article truly described narcissism.  I prefer reading material by actual psychologists and experts in the field to get a better understanding of it.

  5. 5
    Janie

    Thank you for posting this. According to this quiz, my exploitativeness is zero, but I am vain.

    Guilty as charged. I only got a 7 overall, though.

    1. 5.1
      SMC

      Janie, your comment is what spurred me to take the test.  I laughed because my results were almost exactly the same as yours – not exploitative at all (zero), vain and an 8.  Oddly, though, I’m not self-sufficient either (another zero).  Huh.  Was a single mom for years with my own house, all bills paid on time and a great job, too.  (They’re grown now but the rest still holds true.)  If that’s not self-sufficient, I’d like to know what is.  🙂

      1. 5.1.1
        Caroline

        @Janie and SMC-I took it too out of curiosity. I got a 4. My points were on mostly self sufficiency and vanity. Like Evan stated the test is Flawed. I’m not sure why other commenters are taking it so seriously. It’s merely a jumping off point to get a discussion going. I realize my score is so low because I have some self esteem issues (I’m working on it!). I don’t have an Ivy League education and I was able to surmise personality tests are merely a simplistic gauge to help one start considering how your  personality plays into interactions

        Thoughtful discussion brings knowledge and understanding even without a degree in psychology. Note how Evan had (was it a therapist?) give her opinion on his score.

        It was kinda fun. Have a great weekend everyone. For some reason I gotta clear my throat…ahem, ahem.  Just kidding:)

        1. SMC

          Agreed, Caroline, it’s impossible to take tests like these seriously.  I took it just for laughs.  And got one, too.  🙂

        2. Adam Smith

          This test is recognized in Clinical Psychology as a reliable tool, btw. Of course its not infallible but its not just a silly online quiz either.

  6. 6
    Kate

    This woman is spot on. I’ve never heard narcissism explained so well. Bravo!

  7. 7
    Isobel Matheson

    The term Narcissism is so over used these days. The description of narcissism in your article is very good – being a bit full of yourself and a tad arrogant is not narcissism. I have spent the last 7 years recovering from the effects of a relationship with a proper narcissist, and it isn’t a comfortable ride. I, and my daughters, have been left damaged by behaviours that most people would think were not possible, it is not simply getting over someone who was a bit of an egotist. This trend for calling anyone and everyone a narcissist because they have confidence and chutzpah not only insults the person, it totally minimises what a true narcissist can do.

    1. 7.1
      Lovie

      My sympathies to you and your children. Narcissists are terrorists and their false self  is the god they worship.  They bring nothing but total destruction, cloaked in pretty words, false promises and anything else they can use in order to con a person into  giving them what they “need”, no matter what the cost to other human beings.  They will stab you in the back and when you fall down and realize it is someone you loved and trusted who is stabbing you and express shock and outrage, they will keep stabbing you and be pissed off at you for having the audacity to be angry at them.

    2. 7.2
      Caroline

      Well said Isobel. It’s true people throw around labels too freely minimizing  the extreme dysfunction that lies within the person possessing the extreme of the personality disorder. Your example and Evans personal test help others consider there is a scale and that everyone is narcissistic to a degree. By sharing you help all of us get clarity on the subject:)

      My heart goes out to you and your children. Your knowledge on the matter will definitely be integral in your children’s healthy upbringing. Thank goodness there are good parents like you:)

  8. 8
    Stacy2

    I completely agree with the other poster here. We should leave giving out diagnosis to professionals and not issue labels based on some pop-quiz on the Internet. It is insulting and blurres the lines. And narcissist is not the only overused label these days. Are you confident and self-promotional? Narcissist. Like your dishes and floors clean? OCD. Get emotional if somebody says offensive stuff? You nuts be psychotic. Etc.

    1. 8.1
      Adam Smith

      Of course leave diagnosis to the professionals but fyi this is a legitimate personality test thats used in Clinical Psychology – its as least as legitimate as say, the IQ test.

      Don’t take this test and diagnose yourself, but if you take it and look at the breakdown of traits (‘superiority’, ‘vanity’ etc) you might find it interesting. It really ‘nailed’ my personality on all 7 traits:o

  9. 9
    Lovie

    It is very insulting and minimizes the trauma endured by victims of true narcissists, to label anyone who is overly confident and spends an inordinate amount of time on social media sites, as someone with a cluster B personality disorder.  A narcissists isn’t merely someone who takes a lot of selfies, these are severely disordered individuals who destroy lives.

    1. 9.1
      Caroline

      Lovie-respectfully-did you not catch in the post that social media is merely an accelerant if one already has narcissistic tendencies? Maybe I took your comment wrong? I totally agree throw about the label as pertaining the extreme personality disorder. But I do think (as Evan showed in his personal test) there are degrees. Everyone with a pulse has narcissistic tendencies. It’s the extreme that defines the actual disorder.

      1. 9.1.1
        Lovie

        oh absolutely, everyone should have a “healthy” dose of narcissism. I’m probably a little sensitive to the subject currently….I’m trying to survive a nuclear attack by a narc, posing as my soul mate.

        1. Caroline

          Oh goodness Lovie. I’m sorry you’re going through that. I hope you can minimize the aftershocks. Glad you are distancing yourself from someone so toxic. 🙂

  10. 10
    Lovie

    Thank you so much.

  11. 11
    ScottH

    Aren’t narcissists easy to fall for?  They are usually accomplished, appear confident, well dressed, etc… but the destructive behavior doesn’t come out until after they have you hooked, correct?

    I dated someone after she dated a supposed narcissist and it left her a mess and wasn’t easy on me.  I was married to a borderline.  And people are afraid of getting herpes!

    1. 11.1
      KK

      Yes, Scott,

      That was my experience. I was married to one for 15 years and I didn’t notice the destruction until the last 2+ years. It wasn’t until we were in marriage counseling, on the brink of divorce, and with the help of the marriage counselor that I really even understood what I was dealing with. It is very damaging and anyone that’s been in a relationship like this should probably seek counseling and get back on their feet before they even consider a new relationship.

    2. 11.2
      Lovie

      yes, to everything you said. And I would much prefer the herpes.

    3. 11.3
      Michelle

      I wish there was a way of knowing what to look for. This post resonates so much with me as I’ve just very recently left my N for the second (and last) time. He wasn’t overly confident or an extrovert, indeed he was similar to me: quiet, modest and sensitive (perhaps that explains the mirroring?). It was only after finding out I was pregnant that he freaked out  which was a huge shock to me seeing as he wanted kids and said we’d deal with it if it happens, plus he’s 42 and I’m 36 so it’s not like we’re teenagers and only just met (been together 4 years). What made me realise he is a N were his angry reactions (which scared me) and telling me if I chose to keep it he wouldn’t be there for me or the child. I’ve since seen a counsellor who pointed out the mind games and controlling side to him which have clouded my mind for so long. I’m now considering a termination because I can’t bear the thought of having any connection to him or bringing a child into a life of manipulation. Sorry for the rant but I wish there was more serious debate about this destructive term. I think he’s really damaged me and I’m going to need a lot of counselling before I feel ready to date again. Interestingly a friend who dated someone similar rates the counselling she had afterwards to build her damaged self esteem and now she can spot these types a mile off. She is now married and in a very happy relationship. I hope there’s still hope for me!

  12. 12
    Noemi

    This quiz is seriously missing a huge component of what it is to be a clinically diagnosed narcissist. While narcissists and confident individuals both enjoy power, prestige, and vanity, the narcissist is unable to see the destructive damage caused by the pursuit of power. While a confident person has limits, the narcissist does not. The confident individual enjoys being the center of attention. The narcissist will do whatever it takes to be the center of attention, even if it means hurting other people in the process.  A lack of boundaries and serious lack of empathy is what separates the narcissist from your average confident individual.

     

     

  13. 13
    DeeGee

    hmm…  I got a 6 on the test (out of 40).  I actually hoped it would be higher.  I guess I need to work on that.

  14. 14
    Mariella Reichelt

    Thanks for sharing. As my mom used to say “Everything happens for a reason” 🙂

  15. 15
    Barbara

    Interesting read!

    Also:

    “I don’t spend time trying to impress others, and generally go the extra mile to be kind. So I’ve got that going for me. Which is nice.”

    I’m not sure if the reference to the movie/meme was intentional, but I chuckled at this.

    Cheers Evan!

  16. 16
    Carisa Wortman

    Oh my goodness! a tremendous article dude. Thank you However I am experiencing situation with ur rss . Don’t know why Unable to subscribe to it. Is there anybody getting similar rss downside? Anyone who knows kindly respond. Thnkx

  17. 17
    lynx

    The most telling trait of the narcissist I know best (my ex, naturally) is inconsistency. He’ll state one belief to Audience A, then the complete opposite belief to Audience B; his actions are hypocritical. It’s as though he has no true north in regard to values — he says or does whatever will show him in the best light in a given moment.EMK appears to be very different in that he presents clear, consistent values and beliefs. I’m in the nope-not-a-narcissist camp. 

Leave a Reply

Your email address will not be published. Required fields are marked *