In an email I sent out yesterday, I talked about the cost of pain and suffering. I mentioned that we will pay lots of money for pleasure – a car, a vacation – but are not as generous with ourselves when it comes to removing pain. If you’ve ever balked at $200/hr therapists before, you know what I’m talking about. You’d have to go to therapy every single week for 2 straight years to come close to buying a cheap car. Yet you’re more likely to get the car.
Anyway, I wanted to be clear about something I said in that email about the pain of being smart, strong, successful…and single: I’m not assuming that you’re waking up miserable every morning because you don’t have a relationship. Absolutely not. In fact, I’m assuming the opposite. I’m assuming that you’re a generally happy woman with a healthy sense of self-esteem, a great bunch of friends and a good job. I’m assuming that you’ve loved and lost and been hurt by a number of men. Finally, I’m assuming that you’d prefer to find a happy, healthy, nurturing, fun, passionate relationship that lasts forever.
If I’m wrong — if you’d rather be alone than to have a happy, healthy, nurturing, fun, passionate relationship — then my new book, Why He Disappeared isn’t for you. I think it is for you, but there’s one thing holding you back. You’d rather be alone than to risk getting hurt again. And if that’s the case, you’ve already got your own wish.
There’s no risk in staying alone — you can continue to live this way forever — but there’s also no reward. There’s no one to wake up next to you. No one to comfort you directly after a hard day at work. No one to surprise you with a weekend away or homemade pancakes. No one to provide you the love, support and companionship that you desire. And sex! Don’t forget about regular sex with a man you truly care about and who cares for you. If you don’t put yourself out there, if you don’t learn to understand men, if you just leave things the way they are now, nothing is going to change. You’ll read my emails one year from now and your love life will be the same.
If you don’t put yourself out there, if you don’t learn to understand men, if you just leave things the way they are now, nothing is going to change.
If you’re not content with the way that sounds, you’re going to love Why He Disappeared — The Smart, Strong, Successful Woman’s Guide to Understanding Men and Keeping the Right One Hooked Forever. It’s coming out on Tuesday, and because this is the culmination of a full year of research, writing, and lots of ups and downs, I really want to make sure that you’re getting tremendous value out of it.
At this point, you’ve already contemplated the cost of your own pain. How it would feel better to have an amazing relationship than to have an amazing car, and so on. So how much would it be worth for you to know the secrets of the male mind: what we think, why we do what we do, and what you can do differently? Because with the limited time offer that’s coming out Tuesday, I’m going to give you a 130 page eBook that you can read on your computer in seconds. If that’s all I were giving you, the peace of mind and years you’ve saved alone would be worth thousands of dollars. But — as a new husband — I’m really focused on trying to be a giver, not a taker.
Remember, it’s not a matter of choosing between being alone and getting hurt. There’s another path, and I can’t wait to share it with you.
Have a great weekend.