One was called “Why Men Aren’t Speaking Up About the #MeToo Movement.”
The other was called “Why Married Women Get a Raw Deal.”
My intention was to insert myself into the narrative so that I could offer a nuanced first-person take on both issues. Yet, both pieces missed the mark.
In the former, I posited that there are a lot of good guys who don’t know what to do about #MeToo and that change will take place with more courageous women calling men out for sexual harassment. The criticism was that I was absolving men of responsibility.
In the latter, I posited that there are a lot of good husbands who don’t know how to mitigate their wives’ “emotional labor.” The criticism was that I was absolving myself of responsibility.
I know when you write on the Internet, you can’t expect to please all people at all times, but these were two prime examples of why I’m less inclined than ever to spend more than 20 minutes on a blog post.
I know when you write on the Internet, you can’t expect to please all people at all times…
No matter what, there will be an uncharitable reader who is looking for an excuse to attack. Suddenly, a blog post expressing sympathy for women turns into an unproductive dialogue in which, if I offer any defense of myself or men, it gets twisted into some form of “mansplaining” and “patriarchy.” Exhausting.
Which is why I was delighted to get an email from Amy Loftus, host of the Something Better podcast, who invited me to be a guest on her show to discuss these thorny issues.
Amy is a married woman here in Los Angeles who also sees the world through less judgmental and gender-biased eyes, and I really enjoyed our conversation.
Please check it out and let me know what you think in the comments section below.