Maria’s Coaching Journey with Evan Marc Katz – Week 13

2nd Dates and Beyond


Remember the relationships writer – the guy that told me it seemed like I was following EMK’s 2-2-2 rule? We had our second date on Sunday but it wasn’t that much fun. He didn’t talk much and on both dates he seemed too preoccupied with how much dinner would cost… so much so that I was hesitant to even order guacamole! Evan says that if you know you’re not going on another date with a guy, it’s only fair to insist on helping with the check. So at the end of dinner, I made sure we split the bill.

On the other hand, I’m very enthusiastic about the other guy (I’ll call him J). Even though J is not my type, his self-confidence makes him very attractive to me. He had to reschedule the second date due to work but in the meantime he has stayed in touch and is making plans for our next date. This is one of the things that Evan advised me about last week and one of the reasons I’m optimistic about J: “What the guy does between dates is more important than what happened during the date.”

What the guy does between dates is more important than what happened during the date.

Evan always reminds me to temper my optimism and stresses the importance of sharing the same vision in life and the same values. These are the things that prevail after the initial attraction. Lust may be fun in the short term, but in my experience, it hasn’t necessarily lead to a successful long-term relationship.

So even though I had two second dates scheduled, Evan encouraged me to keep logging into Match and communicate with 7-10 different guys in my inbox. As he says, “No man is real until he’s your boyfriend.”

Thank you for following my journey, your support, love and encouragement.

Talk to you next week,


Join our conversation (5 Comments).
Click Here To Leave Your Comment Below.


  1. 1

    I hope your second date with J is as more fun as the first date!! I look forward to hearing all about it. That’s great he is staying in touch. I got spoiled by my last relationship in that respect (and in many other ways) so it’s been difficult not comparing that ideal situation to the guys I meet presently. But I do know now what I deserve and for those guys who don’t step up it’s easy for me to continue looking than to settle.  

    Nice tip about insisting (as much as you can anyway) on paying half the bill on the second date if you know you’re not going to continue to see him. I’ll keep that in mind!  

    1. 1.1

      Hi Debbie!
        My second date with J was very goo 😉 I talk about it in next week’s final blog…. This man is showing me what is possible and if it ends I have his behavior as a blueprint of what I want. Bravo for you to not settle, I won’t either!

  2. 2

    Final blog!! No way, I have looked forward to each and every one of your posts. Maybe Evan can find a creative way of continuing this, or following other stories. Good luck!

  3. 3

    Go, Maria, go!  
    I’m curious; why is J not your usual “type” and what qualities has he shown you, besides confidence and persistence, to make you think he could be a good boyfriend?  

    1. 3.1

      Great question! To begin with for most of my life I was attracted to (my type) very good looking men who were also immature, probably a bad boy, financially unstable….
      J on the other hand is not as good looking. He is a mature man with a career, he is smart and he makes me laugh. He is also very generous and respectful. So far he has a lot of potential. We have been in three dates so far….I’m still login in and getting to know other people….

Leave a Reply

Your email address will not be published. Required fields are marked *