What’s Your Dating Nightmare Story?

I want you to tell me about the WORST date you’ve ever had.

Not the one where he didn’t pay the full check or the one where he talked about himself for 90 minutes. I want you to tell me the funniest, weirdest, most over-the-top bad dating experience you’ve ever had.

It can be a video, in an email, or in an audio — whatever is best suited to telling your story. I just want you to be able to share your pain with other women — so we can all get a mutually cathartic laugh out of it.

Alas, I’m not doing this just for laughs.

I’m doing this for YOU.

After all of the bad date entries come in, I will choose my top 7 and post them for you on my blog. I will then ask you to vote for your favorite, starting on Monday, May 8th.

When voting closes, the top 3 vote-getters will get… Free access to my FOCUS Coaching for an entire year!

If you didn’t already know, FOCUS Coaching is my comprehensive, interactive, affordable coaching program where I choose a new dating topic every month. Sex, Flirting, Being a Great Girlfriend, Overcoming Negativity…just some amazing, juicy topics that give you powerful tools for dating success.

In FOCUS Coaching, I do a live Q&A, taking questions from you for an hour. At the end of the month, I send you a CD/newsletter recap in the mail. In between, you get access to my exclusive member forum, where you can ask me dating questions and receive support from hundreds of other women around the world.

FOCUS Coaching is normally $47/month.

I’m giving that to the winner for 12 months.

That’s $564 in retail value — or about $5000 in coaching value — absolutely FREE.

Just share your dating story by Sunday, May 6th and may the worst date win!

Thanks so much for your willingness to listen, your desire to learn, and your ability to laugh at all the things that can go wrong in dating.

Share your worst date story below:

Update: Story submissions are now closed! Thanks for the hundreds of responses I received, I’ll be announcing the Top 7 Worst Date Stories Tuesday, May 8th. I’ll be sending out updates via my newsletter, so make sure you sign up to get the latest updates and free weekly dating advice.

Join our conversation (30 Comments).
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  1. 21

    I had a first date once with a man I met through Match. We had emailed, then talked on the phone and texted for a while before he arranged to meet me at a local coffee shop. I’m just shy of 5′ 2″ and rather petite, which means almost all of my shoes have some sort of heel on them. Since he listed his height at 5′ 8″, I knew wearing 3 inch heels would be unnecessary, so I settled for sandals with a short 1 inch heel so he would still be taller. He seemed stand-offish when we met and wasn’t an inch over 5′ 6″, but I just figured people lie about their height online all the time and just tried to make a little small talk to try to lighten things up. Boy, did he lighten up! After about 30 minutes, he started complaining about me wearing “high heels” and not paying for my coffee. I quickly ended the date and went home. Not much of a bad date, but it was one of the worst for me.

  2. 22

    “I can think of a thousand ways he could show that without having to automatically pay for stuff.”

    Same here. On a more general note, do people who suggest that traditional behavior gets results consider just how many false positives they will actually run into when this behavior is the well established default? If you could effectively discern interest by looking for the guy who picks up the check, then women who exclusively date men who do this – and the target audience here does, for the most part – would virtually never get played. Every guy above a certain age is socialized to pick up the check, no matter how disinterested they are or how single minded their intentions. If anything, players are going to be well rehearsed and personally invested in tightly adhering to social scripts and fulfilling gender expectations. The biggest risk when going “off script” in regards to splitting checks, asking guys out, retaining whatever level of gendered energy that you naturally exude instead of priming and pruning it towards “the feminine”, and the like – and it’s a fairly large one for a woman who is on a schedule – is running into a guy who while perhaps sincere, relationship oriented, and appealing, is more likely to subject the conventional path of committed relationship to marriage to careful consideration and/or scrutiny.

  3. 23

    btw, I’m not entering the contest either. I’ve taken a lot of Evan’s advice and internalized it. It’s been great and I’ve got the wonderful boyfriend to prove it. If you’re still looking, enter his contest! Good luck, all!

  4. 24

    Sara – I also live in the UK and am like you – I would expect to pay 50/50 on a date regarding costs although if a man insists, I’m happy to graciously accept. I usually put up a bit of a fight though. If I meet a man I want to date I want him to know that I like him for who he is and not because he buys me stuff.

    It’s interesting reading this blog, because little things can be so different even just between the US and the UK. There was a blog post by Evan a while back about whether the person who wrote in should contact a guy she felt attracted to but who hadn’t asked her out at the time they met. Evan’s answer was that there really wasn’t much point as if the guy had liked her, he would have shown this, but I felt that in the UK it is perfectly normal for a guy to like someone and yet not find the nerve to do anything about it. We just aren’t as confident as Americans in that respect. I remember when Gwyneth Paltrow came to the UK once for a few weeks and was astonished she didn’t get hit on by ANY men! Obviously the culture is very different here – she obviously came into contact with plenty she considered eligible and I can’t imagine that among these men there weren’t any who found a stunningly beautiful and talented multi-millionairess attractive. Cultural differences can be enormous.

    I think often what is passed off as “how men work” is actually “how American men work”. I don’t think it’s always universally applicable.

  5. 25

    there is a general sense in my country that 50/50 is ok. in fact, it is also considered fine (by men anyway…:)) for the woman to pick up the tab.
    as for crazy dating experiences I simply didn’t know where to start so never entered the competition.
    Should it be the one who turned up late in an unironed shirt and took me to subway?
    The one who was almost an hour late, lied about his height (considerably), and told me after an hour that unless i wanted an exclusive relationship i couldn’t see him again?
    The one who I had a completely amazing lunch date with after what i thought was 6 weeks of exclusive dating (his proclamation not mine) who emailed me later that day to say ‘by the way i’m going on a date tonight, thought you might like to know’
    The one who laid a serious complaint with the police about my best friends husband (a lie) and put me down as a witness
    The one who after spending the weekend with me texted me from his car to say how sad he was becuase he just didn’t seem to be able to find someone suitable to have a relationship with/marry
    The one who after the best date I have EVER been on, FB messaged me to say he thought he probably ought to let me know he had a girlfriend
    The one who suggested taking me out to dinner, took me to Burger King (Hungry Jacks) and then disappeared to the bathroom leaving me to pay
    The one who spent the entire date talking about his previous dating experiences with online dating and how disappointing it all was

  6. 26

    So I went on a date with this guy (a boy, really), he was 30, and I’m 23. Initially I thought about cancelling, something in the way he spoke struck me as odd. I decided I’d go.   We met up at a coffee shop. The conversation wasn’t bad, but I’d definitely had better conversation on dates. I gave him the benefit of doubt and asked if he’d want to join me for dinner.

    So as the check’s  coming at dinner, he asks “so you’re gonna pay right?” and I always offer to pay on dates, I offered to pay for coffee. But the assuming nature of it annoyed me. At one point I’d mentioned that I’d made some lifestyle changes (exercising/dieting), and how it’s still an ongoing process for me. He proceeded to give me dieting tips “oh you should try keto, don’t eat carbs at night, I can help you” I never asked for it, I stayed quiet and kept listening. “Oh you know you’re like really pretty, you have a great smile and a great personality but if you lost more weight you’d look like a model.”

    So at this point I got up to leave and all I said was “okay, I think I’m gonna go” and he kept asking me to smile, asked why I was being emotional. As I’m walking out the door, he calls after me to let him know if I want to go hiking with him sometime.

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