Why You MUST Persevere in Online Dating

0 Shares

Yeah, I squint a little bit, but my wife/cinematographer still thinks I’m cute.

And while we wouldn’t have written to each other online (She’s too old! He’s too Jewish!), that’s the perfect reason for you to learn from our mistakes!

Pushing yourself to be open to people outside your normal search criteria can literally double your dating options and introduce you to your future soulmate.

I don’t blame you for being frustrated at online dating. Everyone is.

But if you want to take your love life into your own hands instead of waiting for divine intervention, put in your email address to get access to my VERY interesting Online Dating Quiz.

It’s only 5 questions and if you get them all right, you’ll get a chance to win a FREE copy of my Finding the One Online audio series. You will also be put on an exclusive list that will save you lots of money on a special offer I’m going to reveal next week.

Good luck on the quiz!

*Note: After you enter your name and email you’ll be taken to the quiz, and an interesting page with interesting information about the answers and what they mean to YOU. Also, be sure check your inbox, as I’ll be notifying you by email if you are one of the winners of Finding The One Online!








Name
Email

Join our conversation (69 Comments).
Click Here To Leave Your Comment Below.

Comments:

  1. 21
    Lucy

    “On the other hand, a guy who I’ve known as a friend for a year or two, who I’ve seen stay patient when things go wrong, who I know is a good man… I am thrilled when he kisses me!”

    Wow, I would never want to be with a man I didn’t want to kiss for a year or two. We all  really are different, aren’t we?

  2. 22
    Lucy

    “@Liz #15, does match.com pay you well?” Hehe, I was thinking the same thing. I don’t find  many appealing men on any of the dating sites, including  match.com. “so many great men, so little time!” — I wish!

  3. 23
    Karl R

    Helen said: (#14)
    “There is a certain kind of sweetness when friendship turns into romance that women love.   We already know, like, and trust the men.”
    Goldie said: (#16)
    “I may know the guy for years and feel nothing. Then one day, he grows on me”
    m said: (#19)
    “a guy who I’ve known as a friend for a year or two, who I’ve seen stay patient when things go wrong, who I know is a good man… I am thrilled when he kisses me!”

    When I started dating my girlfriend (an acquaintance at that time), there were two other men in the picture. The first was a shy guy who was trying the “friends first” while he waited for the right time to become something more. The other was a widower  whom she’d been friends with for 30 years, and whom asked her on dates about once per month.

    It took me about three days to displace the first guy. The second man took a couple months. It took that long because she was very interested in having a serious relationship with him. She eventually realized that she could either wait (possibly for years) to discover whether  he would ever step up and start acting like a real boyfriend, or she could seize her window of opportunity with the man who was already acting like a boyfriend.

    I went past both those men like they were standing still … because they were.

    I can see how the “friends first”  situation seems very sweet, safe and thrilling to the woman, but it seems highly impractical to the man (and fairly impractical for the women). In an ideal circumstance, you’d like the man to be friends with you for 1 or 2 years, while he patiently hopes that one day he might possibly grow on you … and with no guarantee that it will ever happen.

    I don’t need to wait years for a possibility within my small pool of friends. If I pursue dates with  the  women who are acquaintances and strangers, I have  a much larger pool. I can get new dates within weeks. Within two years, I have a good chance of finding a long-term relationship.

    If you turn me down  (as a stranger), we can still  become friends afterward. If I later start to grow at you, I now have a second opportunity. Furthermore, I’m more likely to seem like a good, likeable,  trustworthy  prospect if I’m regularly dating or in relationships with other women. Furthermore, you’re less likely to wait if you’re concerned that I might drop off the market forever.

    How is it practical for the women if their ideal situation primarily rewards the men who don’t play by those rules?

  4. 24
    Helen

    Karl R #23, actually, it sounds as though you did it just right timewise.   I know you like numbers, 🙂 so here is a rough breakdown for clarification:
      
    In the past, when a guy tried to pursue me after meeting me just once, the relationship always failed (and none of them are currently my friends).
      
    But when a guy became a good friend over 2-3 months – which sounds like your case with your current girlfriend – then the relationship was (and is) awesome, and had more potential for evolving into a long-term friendship even when the romance ended.
      

  5. 25
    Goldie

    @ Karl R:
      
    “In an ideal circumstance, you’d like the man to be friends with you for 1 or 2 years, while he patiently hopes that one day he might possibly grow on you … and with no guarantee that it will ever happen.”
      
    Ummm let’s not go to extremes here. I was talking about things I’ve seen from my own online dating experience, where on your first date, the man may either decide he’s not interested, and then he disappears forever; or he decides he likes you, and then he immediately starts pushing for being exclusive and, er, consummating the relationship (after which he expects to be together forever, because OMG you’ve had sex!, hence you’re in a serious relationship now). I’m not talking about one or two years, but give me more than one or two hours, for crying out loud. There appears to be this assumption that, if you’ve made it past one date and are still in contact, that you’re now officially a couple. What couple? I still don’t know the guy.
      
    This is what I was talking about. Not some two-year wait period. How the heck is it practical for a guy to become heavily involved with a total stranger? I understand that it’s slightly safer for the guy than it is for the woman… but how’s it ever practical to place obligations on yourself and commit to someone you don’t even know?
      
    “If you turn me down  (as a stranger), we can still  become friends afterward. If I later start to grow at you, I now have a second opportunity.”
      
    Again, my online experiences only. If I turn the man down as a stranger, he runs off in a huff. There’s no being friends (while dating other people, natch) and no second opportunity. Maybe I should try Liz’s site 😀
      
    That’s one thing. Another point I was trying to make is that I noticed, both on this thread and in general, that guys seem to think of the “friend zone” as some barren wasteland – that, when a woman says you’re her friends, that it’s the polite term for “I won’t sleep with you if my life depended on it, not now, not ever”. And that’s just not true. “Friend” is not a swear word, people 🙂

  6. 26
    Luxe

    I guess it depends on the person. If I told a guy I wanted to be friends first, it would normally mean that I like him, but not enough to go out with him. That is generally the case. However, I did start out as “just friends” first with one guy and we did end up going out for a few months. Still managed to be friends after we broke up, but I’m not sure if starting out as strangers vs. friends had any real advantage. The only thing I can think of is that I was respected and treated better right off the bat with being friends first.

  7. 27
    Denise

    #20 & #16

    I wish I could adopt this ‘grow on you thing’.   If I don’t feel sexually interested in a man right away, I don’t see how that is going to grow.     I’m thinking maybe this is an individual personality type of thing.  
    I am really trying though to give men a chance and not write them off if I don’t feel it right away, but now I’m on 4 meetings with someone I met on line, great guy, high character, similar beliefs and values and I am not feeling any type of excitement of being with him.   He really likes me, so this is awkward–again.

    How does one sexually flirt with a ‘friend’ without giving the impression there is an interest to get to know him more?

    Overall, I don’t need any more friends, I have plenty of friends. I want a man that I feel excited about.   Not where I feel like I would rather do my own thing or hang with my current friends rather than go through the motions and hope he grows on me.

    It’s funny that my experience has been opposite, this ‘friends’ then lovers/boyfriend thing was more likely (and did) to happen when I was in my 20’s.

    #16 Goldie

    OMG, your instincts and common sense were right on!   Him getting angry = HUGE red flag.   It’s really good when you can weed men out very early just by simple ‘tests’ like this…it doesn’t sound like you meant it as a test, but that’s ultimately what is was.

  8. 28
    Karl R

    Helen said: (#24)
    “when a guy became a good friend over 2-3 months — which sounds like your case with your current girlfriend”

    Probably not like our case.

    It took  less than  one month to become good friends, 2-3 months to become explicitly  exclusive, less than 1 week to become physically intimate, and just over 1 week before I started spending most nights at her house.

    Not the usual timeline for my relationships (or hers), but it’s ended up being the best  relationship of  our lives. I’ve heard a number of anecdotes from different people where the really good relationships didn’t follow the pattern of their other relationships.

    Goldie said: (#25)
    “my online experiences only. If I turn the man down as a stranger, he runs off in a huff. There’s no being friends”

    Speaking strictly of online: I didn’t join an online dating site because I needed more friends. I have as many friends as I have time for. I have a few hundred friendly acquaintances whom I enjoy when our paths happen to cross. I don’t have incentive to take time away from my friends  to  befriend a woman who wasn’t interested in dating me. I don’t “run off in a huff.” I just go back to my busy life. If we cross paths in the future,  she’s another friendly acquaintance who I enjoy but don’t make time for.

    If I started dating the woman through our real-life activities, I’m certainly not going to avoid her if she’s not interested or things don’t work out. She’ll be a friendly acquaintance with a possibility of becoming a friend.

    Goldie said: (#25)
    “There appears to be this assumption that, if you’ve made it past one date and are still in contact, that you’re now officially a couple.”

    I don’t know any guys who assume that.

    Goldie said: (#25)
    “guys seem to think of the ‘friend zone’ as some barren wasteland — that, when a woman says you’re her friends, that it’s the polite term for ‘I won’t sleep with you if my life depended on it, not now, not ever’. And that’s just not true.”

    Think of the number of guys where you directly told them (or strongly implied) that you wanted to be friends instead of romantic partners. (Telling them you had a boyfriend/husband doesn’t count. We  assume that’s code for, “I’m not available right now.”) Of all those guys, how many did you later have sex with?

    We can’t read your mind. We don’t know whether you would consider having sex with us. We only know what you said, and what you later did. That’s  what  our truth is based on.

    Goldie asked: (#25)
    “how’s it ever practical to place obligations on yourself and commit to someone you don’t even know?”

    What obligations and what commitment? My relationships start with no obligations beyond common courtesy. It’s the  men and women  who are accustomed to dating people they already know who seem most likely to want a degree of commitment up front.

    1. 28.1
      Marika

      Karl R

      Just wanted to thank you for your  enlightening comments. I was definitely in the “I wish men were cool with going slow and being friends first”, but I had never thought about it the way you  explained it. Probably the central point of where Evan is coming from – women don’t consider men’s point of views often enough in dating, and vice versa!

      I’ll be more understanding from now on. You’re right, one guy actually said to me “it feels like you’re putting me in the friend zone” (which was in response to him being unbelievably busy and having no time for the kind of relationship I want, but we got on like a house on fire, so I thought friends was a good compromise!), like it was the worse possible insult. I didn’t get that, or why he would feel that way, but it seems for a guy being ‘friends’ is worse than ‘no contact’ (whereas I would always prefer to keep great people in my life than not). It’s all making sense now!

      Karl, can I ask, what would you see as the best way to encourage a man to go at least a bit slow, particularly physically, without insulting or emasculating him? I know you said once it was on with your girlfriend you moved pretty fast physically, but if she wasn’t quite ready, is there a way she could have made that clear nicely and pro masculine-ly so that it wouldn’t create the kind of issues alluded to here?

      Thanks so much!

  9. 29
    Goldie

    Awww Karl, why do you take my words out of context?
      
    Karl #28:
    Goldie said: (#25)
    “my online experiences only. If I turn the man down as a stranger, he runs off in a huff. There’s no being friends”

    Speaking strictly of online: I didn’t join an online dating site because I needed more friends. I have as many friends as I have time for. I have a few hundred friendly acquaintances whom I enjoy when our paths happen to cross. I don’t have incentive to take time away from my friends  to  befriend a woman who wasn’t interested in dating me. I don’t “run off in a huff.” I just go back to my busy life. If we cross paths in the future,  she’s another friendly acquaintance who I enjoy but don’t make time for.”
      
    I said this in response to yours:
      
    “If you turn me down (as a stranger), we can still become friends afterward. If I later start to grow at you, I now have a second   opportunity.”
      
    What did you mean by that? I thought you were referring to online, because that’s the only place I know where a man approach a stranger with romantic intentions. (Unless he’s some crazy pickup artist who approaches random people on the street.) So in one post you tell me that, if I turn down an online stranger after an email exchange, or 1-2 dates (at which point he’s still a stranger to me…) that we can still become friends afterwards (hasn’t happened to me online yet.) and in your next, you say that, once I turn you down as a stranger, that’s it, you’ve gone back to your busy life and we won’t talk again. This makes sense to me, but I’m back to my original problem. In my brief online dating experience, I felt that I was being pushed too far, too soon.
      
    Like I said, maybe I should try again, switch to a different site and see what happens… I was on the infamous fish 😀
      
    “It’s the  men and women  who are accustomed to dating people they already know who seem most likely to want a degree of commitment up front.”
      
    Hmm, maybe that’s what happened to me. Pretty much all men I met online were new to dating, divorced less than a year ago.
      
    A couple of them said that they were family men, just out of a 15-year or a 20-year marriage, and not used to fooling around – they wanted a serious commitment or it’s over. I chose the “it’s over” 😉

  10. 30
    Kat

    I did the quiz and got 4/5. I didn’t think women would be that critical when rating a guys’ looks as we are.

  11. 31
    Karl R

    Goldie said: (#29)
    “What did you mean by that? I thought you were referring to online, because that’s the only place I know where a man approach a stranger with romantic intentions. (Unless he’s some crazy pickup artist who approaches random people on the street.)”

    I asked one woman out after she sat next to me once at church. (I figured out which pew she sat in, and deliberately sat next to her usual spot.) After going on one date I decided she was too young for me.

    I chatted with another woman at church three times before asking her out. We dated exclusively  for 4 or 5 months.

    While still dating that woman, I met another woman at a dance party. The next time I saw her (after the breakup) I asked her for her phone number. We dated for 6 weeks.

    I met another woman while out dancing at a bar. After asking her to dance and chatting for several minutes, I got her phone number. We went on one date before I quickly realized we were not right for each other.

    One time in a diner  I sat at the counter next to an attractive woman. We started a conversation over breakfast. I left the diner with her email address and an excuse to contact her. We went on two dates. She works two blocks from me, so we sometimes cross paths during lunch.

    If I meet someone where there seems to be mutual attraction, I’ll figure out how likely it is that I’ll see  her again. If I expect to  never see  her again, then I have to get her email or phone number before she leaves.

    If I’ll see the woman somewhat  regularly, I’ll ask her out after crossing paths several times. But I’ll make a point of doing it while we’re still essentially strangers. I’ll get to know her on the first few dates.

    Goldie said: (#29)
    “So in one post you tell me that, if I turn down an online stranger after an email exchange, or 1-2 dates”

    Where did I specify online? I didn’t  say  “online” in that entire post (#23). Furthermore, I began that post by quoting you (#16) saying, “I may know the guy for years and feel nothing. Then one day, he grows on me”

    Unless you knew these men for years through online dating, you took my words out of context.

    The only way this applies to online dating is if you happen to meet someone online whom you also cross paths with in the normal course of your life.

  12. 32
    Sayanta

    One thing that I’ve been noticing online is that men really have absolutely nooo confidence. You can even see it in the way they pose in their photos- all looking like they’ve done something bad. LOL I’m wondering, are men in this society in general kind of losing confidence in themselves? I see it in person too- single guys who’re always shuffling, looking down, look like they’re about to have a panic attack if a woman talks to them.

    Guys with girlfriends/wives tend to not be like this. People have told me it’s because they’re taken that they’re confident. So…does that mean that they’re only confident because they’re taken, or the other way around? Chicken or egg, anyone? Not that I would go out with a taken guy of course, but it’s driving me a liiiitle crazy- oh, that and the taken guys who spring the fact that they have a girlfriend just as you think they’re about to ask you out. I wonder if these guys just do that to see the look on a girl’s face. Sadism, anyone?

    Ok- my negative rain shower is over. For now. 🙂

  13. 33
    Goldie

    So far, this thread has managed to scare me into getting back together with an old friend of mine. From what I’ve read here, I am clearly not in the right mindset yet for online dating.
      
    The friend is happy 😀 On my end, I promise I’ll try the online thing again when I’m ready. Now I’m really curious how to get it to work 😀

    1. 33.1
      Cat

      Oh, Goldie, (#33) don’t let anyone’s horror stories scare you away from online dating! Definitely jump on that deal Evan is offering right now for his comprehensive online dating guide. I definitely recommend it! Plus, right now you get all the bonuses! (Ends Nov 7.) There is so much information in that package that you will not find anywhere else, and certainly not get just from reading the blog (though, of course, I love the blog!)

      Also, Goldie, I’m sure your friend is happy but don’t forget it might hold you back from what you’re looking for in the long term. See this post.

  14. 34
    Karl R

    Sayanta asked: (#32)
    “I’m wondering, are men in this society in general kind of losing confidence in themselves?”

    50% of all men and women describe themselves as “shy.” Therefore, if you’re looking for people who appear shy or underconfident in social sitiuations, you will see them everywhere.

    Sayanta asked: (#32)
    “does that mean that they’re only confident because they’re taken, or the other way around?”

    On a case-by-case basis, it could be either.

    People who appear confident are more attractive to others -and- people who are confident have an easier time initiating relationships. Therefore, they generally  spend less time between relationships.

    On the other hand, a great relationship can boost your confidence. A bad or messy breakup can cause your confidence to take a hit.

    Sayanta said: (#32)
    “the taken guys who spring the fact that they have a girlfriend just as you think they’re about to ask you out. I wonder if these guys just do that to see the look on a girl’s face.”

    Evan’s a naturally outgoing and flirtatious guy. Over the last couple decades I’ve developed the habit of being  outgoing and flirtatious as well. When we enter a long-term relationship, we don’t turn off our natural/habitual behavior. It’s possible for us to come across as if we’re pursuing a relationship even when we’re in one. If we get the impression that the woman is coming to that conclusion, we do our best to clear up the misunderstanding … by mentioning our girlfriend. When we’re in a solid, serious relationship, that’s our reasoning.

    If we’re in an exclusive but less serious relationship (one which may never go anywhere), there’s another reason for us to do this. We want to keep our options open if our current relationship doesn’t work out. If you’re interested in a man but he doesn’t ask you out, what do you assume? He’s not interested? He lacks the self-confidence to make the first move? If we mention our girlfriend, then you don’t assume either of those. We don’t have to clear up any misconceptions if we try to pursue a relationship after our current one ends.

    As an added bonus, our  “taken” relationship status actually makes us more attractive to single women, which may help us find another relationship later on if we’re “available” again. (Before you decide that’s complete nonsense, you might read the article, “Are all the taken men good?)
    http://www.cmaj.ca/cgi/content/full/175/12/1573

    It’s not sadism. It might be self-serving.

  15. 35
    Sayanta

    Karl-

    Well…what I’ve come across is men who mention a girlfriend and still continue to try to ask me out after that- it could be that I’ve just attracted duplicitous men and am drawing a generalization based on that.

    Here’s a little story- a few years ago, I was sitting at Starbucks, and this very good looking guy was sitting at the opposite table eyeing me, and smiling at me. I smiled back. A few friends -all male- joined him, and then he continued to stare at and smile at me, and this time his friends were looking toward me as well. I got the impression that he was trying to initiate something. About half an hour later, he actually left his table and asked to come join me. Naturally, I was thrilled. We start talking, and since I was up in the Northern part of the country back then, I asked him what had brought him to the area. His answer?  “I’m here with my girlfriend.” I was stunned. And the thing is- I’ve got a very expressive face, and so I HATE it when guys see the look of shock after they’ve dropped this little tidbit.

    So…I don’t know, the above guy seems to be more than ‘flirtatious’ or ‘self-serving’ – he seems to be a downright (insert expletive). And the incidents I’m talking about go more toward the above than casual flirting at a party or something.

    Now, I’ve got to wonder though- what is it about me that’s attracting these kinds of men? I’ve been told I’ve got a ‘sweet, innocent’ fact- is this the whole Little Red Riding Hood v. the Big Bad Wolf thing? ;-P

  16. 36
    SS

    I’m a woman, and I’m not interested in a man who suggests “friends first.”
      
    You know why? Because I’m on an online dating site to DATE, and I’m dating because I’m ultimately interested in a long-term relationship with someone. If I wanted friends, I’d join a pen pal site or something like that.
      
    Now, all this means is that I am going into the process with the mindset of taking it one date at a time — I’m obviously not trying to fall in love with the man on the first date and marry him after the second — but with the intention of determining eventually if this person is long-term material.
      
    If we click on the first date and he wants a second date, then I’m game. If a second date turns into a third date, then great. And so on… but if we keep making it to date after date, I’m eventually going to expect him to express his desire for a committed relationship after a certain point in time. And if not, I’m moving on.
    The dating process is the time in which we are getting to know each other. While I’m not going to rush through that, at the same time, if he is trying to drag out the process by trying to be “friends” first, then I’ll probably be gone with a quickness. There’s no need, in my mind, to drag out the relational process ESPECIALLY when both of us met on a site CLEARLY designed to bring people together for more-than-friendship purposes.

  17. 37
    Laine

    Karl @#28 I commend you that you dont run off in a huff, but you are not a woman and have no idea what it is like to be on the end of male attention on online dating sites. And either does Evan for that matter..he’s a guy too and his take on all this reflective of his own subjective experiences. Im with Goldie @ #25. Men that I  politely refuse  do run off in a huff ..and its not just the random odd one..its the majority. I have had emails of abuse sent to me  when I say I cant see myself as a match with a guy. Some men take the trouble to then  write to criticise my profile…I have had things said such as ” who do you think you are”   to “”you look like a dog anyway”.
    Hard to keep positive when this is the majority of men Ive come across. If you do the statistics on online dating..the chances of meeting a partner are someting like 0.0001. If this was a research study looking at a new cancer drug, for instance, it would be canned!

    1. 37.1
      Evan Marc Katz

      Laine,

      While you are entitled to disagree with any of my positions, let’s get our facts straight, shall we?

      Do you have a greater chance of meeting a partner if you’re:

      a) Dating online and meeting one new person every week, even if you don’t like 80% of them?
      b) Not dating online and meeting one new person every four months, who may or may not like you in return?

      Thus, it doesn’t matter if X people got married out of a sample size of Y people dating online. The point is that by dating actively, you increase the possibility you’ll find love.

      The reason I created Finding the One Online is to help you use the medium successfully, where previously you may have struggled. Instead of complaining that “it doesn’t work”, wouldn’t it make sense to try it a different way?

      Click here to learn more:

      https://www.evanmarckatz.com/FTOO-digital/

  18. 38
    Goldie

    See, #37 is the reason why I think I may not be cut out for online dating. The process as described in the post, reminds me of a, I don’t know, Black Friday sale, where you run into the store, grab something, pay for it, bring it home and see if it fits. And then if it doesn’t, it’s a pain in the arse to return and get your money back.
      
    I’m not looking to get into an LTR with “someone”. I was already married to “someone”. I’m out to find a man that I can trust, that I can count on if times get hard, that I can have fun with, who will overall improve the quality of my life and I of his, otherwise why bother. I cannot determine after a handful of dates if a guy I’d never seen before is that man. Yet I have seen this expectation, that if we’ve had several dates together, then this means I have signed on the dotted line and will now be a bad person for saying I want to take it slow or back out – even though I am still finding out new things about this guy and some of these new things may be deal-breakers.
      
    If there is a dating site for slowpokes, please drop me a link 🙂 that’d be the one for me 🙂

    1. 38.1
      Evan Marc Katz

      Goldie,

      Seriously. You’re a valued contributor, but you don’t get it. You only get your own story.

      How can you find a man you can trust, a man you can count on, a man you have fun with – if you’re not actively seeking men?
      Why do you think you have to determine after a handful of dates that you have to sign on the dotted line? That is a limited experience, and certainly not the only one.
      Why do you assume that every person who dates online is the same when 50 million people have tried it? That makes no logical sense whatsoever.

      Online dating IS for slowpokes; you just haven’t learned to use it right.

      Click here and let me know how it works for you. I really want to help.

      https://www.evanmarckatz.com/FTOO-digital/

    2. 38.2
      Cat

      Angie (#18) – Evan gives an example of a client who says online dating takes “too much time” and would rather just go to her Spanish class. Evan says to add online dating after her class, for 20 or 30 minutes a day, not to “give up” her class. But he adds that if she’s taking the class just as a way to meet men, it’s got much lower odds for success than being online. And in the long run, getting ready for, & traveling to and from the class takes a lot more time and effort than putting in twenty or thirty minutes online, which is what she was complaining about.

      Laine (#38) – If men on dating sites are acting badly after you reject them, the easy thing to do is immediately block them after you send your version of “thanks for your interest, but I don’t think we’re a match. Good luck with your search!” Report the abusive ones. If this is truly the majority of men you come across, you should try a different site!

      Goldie (#39) – I don’t think #37 sounds like a description of a Black Friday sale at all! It sounds like a rational approach to dating with the focus being on getting to know someone slowly rather than trying a force a future on it. How does that sound like a defective product bought in haste and rushed home that will be hard to return? Goldie, you’re in charge of how fast or slow the process goes!

      Ladies, Evan really does cover all of this stuff in Finding the One Online which is now on sale and bundled with tons of extras! He tells you how to find the site that’s right for you, how to write your profile, how to handle first dates… It’s a really long list so click on the link and check it out for yourselves. This is a great deal on that product. I’m a little jealous! And it ends Sunday at midnight.

      The fact is, online dating is here to stay. And it’s not a different world with different men. The one man you meet at that Spanish class Evan’s client went to? He’s online! The cute guy at the coffee shop? He’s online. Of all the men who’ve asked me out this year in “real” life, only one didn’t tell me he also did online dating. No, he used Facebook!

  19. 39
    Goldie

    Thanks Evan (#41). I just might… Just need to find the room in my budget for it 🙂 but I’m definitely considering it, if only to find out that online dating can, in fact, work for people like me 🙂 I *am* looking for ways to use it right, you know. That’s why I’m here.

  20. 40
    Denise

    I have done a ton of on line dating and can’t remember an instance when a man got really abusive with me after I said I didn’t think we were a romantic match–I’m NOT saying it doesn’t happen, but I think it happens less than what you might be experiencing, sometimes we tend to exaggerate the ‘reality’.

    I also haven’t had anyone come out and be overly sexual with me on first communication.

    Our profiles have a lot to do with who we ‘attract’, I believe.   It’s NOT something we do consciously, but I do think that happens.   It sounds like Evan’s program helps with that.

    I have recently changed my headline on a free site I’m on, that seemed to do the trick!   I think I have a good profile as it, but I am leaning towards purchasing Evan’s on line program just to see if I can get any other nuggets out there.   It’s a great deal!

    I do find that I have to take breaks from on line dating–I get a bad attitude after going through men like water :), welllll, it’s not quite like that, but you know   what I mean (I get tired of saying no).

    I would love to hear people’s comments about meeting people on line and giving them a chance by dating them several times, even if you don’t feel a stong physical attraction up front?   I was speaking with a male friend who commented that he feels women don’t give men enough of a chance.   I met a man last week who really likes me, but I’m not too sure about him.   He is an awesome man from a character standpoint, so I think I’m going to date him a few more times…comments.

Leave a Reply

Your email address will not be published. Required fields are marked *