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Home > Understanding Men

Understanding Men

I don’t speak for all men. But I try to speak for the most desirable ones: smart, successful, confident, driven, honest, experienced, sensitive, and marriage-oriented. If you want to be in a relationship with a man like that, please read every single post below to get a better sense of how we think. Knowledge is power.

About The BLOG

Find out what my blog can do for you, and what type of man becomes a dating coach for women.

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(Stereotype Alert!) Are Men and Women Different? It Sure Looks That Way.

difference between how men and women see themselves in the mirror

Not every blog post has to explore the deep existential crisis of wanting to find lasting love in a lonely, indifferent universe.  Sometimes, it just feels good to laugh.   I saw…

Read More… 241 comments

Why Don’t Men Like Smart, Strong, Successful Women?

Smart woman with arms crossed

Hi, Evan. I’m 41, happy with my rounded self, smart, direct, and articulate. I’ve been told that my lack of dates is due to: 1) Men don’t like smart, direct…

Read More… 1,353 comments

Why Do Men Who Don’t Want Anything Serious End Up with Girlfriends?

Why Are There No Attractive Men in Your Area

I’m 31, fit, intelligent, attractive, and I’ve done enough work on myself to know that I’m happy, and that I’m ready for a relationship. Here’s my pattern: I’ll have a…

Read More… 388 comments

Do Men Who Have Friends That Cheat Become Cheaters?

man wearing a wedding ring

Evan, My guy has two groups of friends. The first group is nice, fun guys that are family-oriented and career-focused. The second group are single guys that love partying, womanizing…

Read More… 33 comments

My Boyfriend Expressed Doubts When Asking Me to Be His Girlfriend. Should I Worry?

girl thinking about her boyfriend having doubts in their relationship

I came across your blog when I first started online dating a few years ago in New York and your advice has helped me navigate the modern dating scene. I’ve…

Read More… 545 comments

Do Men Like Bitches Or Nice Girls?

Do Men Like Bitches Or Nice Girls?

Evan, When it comes to dating, what do you think works best for attracting a man — and making him want to commit? In the world of dating advice, there…

Read More… 141 comments

Why Would a Guy Keep in Touch After He Already Dumped Me?

A woman having a headache

Hi Evan, I’ve been dating an amazing guy who’s only just recently become “too busy” for a relationship. I know that is really just code for him losing interest and…

Read More… 239 comments

How Can I Learn To Trust A Man And Give Him Freedom?

How Do I Cope With the Other Women in His Life?

Hello Evan, I’m new to you, but I’m a quick student. My question is not really for you, though, it’s for your wife. Has she written anything you can refer…

Read More… 179 comments

Why Do Men Not Want to Understand Women?

episode 90 why do men not want to understand women

There’s an entire self-help world built on women looking in the mirror, taking responsibility and earnestly trying to understand what men are thinking. Men, on the other hand, remain somewhere…

Read More… 186 comments

40-Year-Old Men Want to Get Married, Too! (On Not Being the Old Guy In the Club)

40 year old men want to get married

I couldn’t be more sympathetic to women  who are struggling in love. You’re burned out with online dating. You’ve wasted years on unavailable and abusive men. You’ve focused  all your attention on…

Read More… 196 comments
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You Said

  • "This is brilliant advice EMK! It’s been years since I’ve dated and I also rarely dated in my teens and 20s. Now that I’m in my 30s and having to start over, I must say I barely know much about d…"
    Amie on Five Questions To Consider When Dating A New Guy
  • "I'm also appreciative of Evan's unequivocal advice to dump this loser and not make any excuses for his behavior. My low self esteem resulted in a number of pathetic relationships. This guy's putting…"
    Sheila Pearl Williams on Where Is the Line Between Being Demanding and Expressing Needs?
  • "I really needed to hear this today. I just had a break up with a guy I've been dating for the past year. We didn't have any fight - I just gently brought up that he had been shutting down lately and w…"
    Michelle on Where Is the Line Between Being Demanding and Expressing Needs?
  • "When I read the response from the “boyfriend” I believed she must have been dating my ex. Excellent response, Evan.…"
    Jennifer C. on Where Is the Line Between Being Demanding and Expressing Needs?
  • "I love your response Evan.It takes responsible attitude to accept responsibility and do what is right.…"
    Ella on Where Is the Line Between Being Demanding and Expressing Needs?
  • "Alexandra, I hope you are reading all these comments and take them to heart. If you are still with this guy, then I suggest you work on building up your self-esteem. He's just not into you. Not your f…"
    Starla888 on Where Is the Line Between Being Demanding and Expressing Needs?
  • "I am fortunate in that I found an amazing man who doesn't wait until a special occasion. He acted as my chauffeur yesterday when I went to an out-of-town meeting and would have been too exhausted to d…"
    Persephone on Where Is the Line Between Being Demanding and Expressing Needs?
  • "Wow!! Wowie!! I’m sorry that happened to you Alexandra. You very clearly communicated your needs and he invalidated your feelings, ignored your needs and then proceeded to gaslight you. Run, don’…"
    PJ on Where Is the Line Between Being Demanding and Expressing Needs?

Happy ClientsHappy Clients

  • Rachel E.

    "Thank you Evan for your training. In less than one year, I met my fiancé online!"

    I learned so much from Evan’s training and FOCUS Coaching… I was passionate about meeting someone who respected me, honored me, and really loved me…just for me. And, I wanted to feel the same about him. I’m thrilled to say that I found that man.

    Rachel E.
  • Lise A.

    "Working with Evan has helped me to really value myself and to be myself when I am dating. This is priceless."

    Look, I can say I feel more confident than ever before but it’s more than that. Working with Evan has helped me to really value myself and to be myself when I am dating. This is priceless. It’s not perfect but I have come a thousand miles from where I was and feel so lucky.

    Lise A.
  • Maria N.

    "Evan, you’re amazing. You’re changing a little corner of the world in a very special way."

    The thing that I most love about Dan is that I can be myself around him. At 52 years old, I’ve never felt that way with any man I’ve dated… I believe that it’s just a matter of time before all of you beautiful women on here find someone special. Don’t give up!

    Maria N.

Have a Dating Question? Search My Date-A-Base.

If you’re looking to answer your most pressing dating and relationship question, my blog is like Google for your love life!

Just type your one-line question into the search box below to see my answer.

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    • How to Date a Guy During Social Distancing
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