For various reasons that I don’t want to get into, though not for lack of opportunity, I had never had a relationship when I joined FOCUS Coaching. I decided that I could either spend the rest of my life alone or apply that logic and determination that I have so well in my professional life and try to find love.
So I really applied myself. I went deep into who I am and what I needed and wanted in a relationship. I found my flaws but also identified all the wonderful things about my character. I took a hard look at the kind of man I really NEEDED, the one who will stand by my side. Did he look anything like the kind of “successful” man I had superficially envisioned? I found my backbone and confidence and fun — I checked the men who were too aggressive, who didn’t respect me and created positive energy wherever I went. I believed in my own success, that this could happen. And I stopped dating out of a feeling of fear and scarcity — fear that I had missed the boat, that there were no longer any good men out there, that even if I were to find him, he’d think I was weird or wouldn’t accept me, blah blah blah. I had to get out of my own way and trust the process.
I could not have gotten here without the loving support from all of you. I hope that I have been helpful too in your time of need. And never forget, we women as a community need to support one another. There are so many instances in the world today that women are not allowed to date or have any basic human rights at all. And also that there are great men out there like Evan who support us and believe in us. So we have a prerogative to pass it forward and believe in ourselves.