(Infographic) Thanks to You, EvanMarcKatz.com Had 9 Million Readers in 2015!

When I started blogging in 2007, it was based on a friend’s recommendation. “Everybody’s doing it. It’s good for SEO. It’s a way to connect with your fans.” To me, it just sounded like a pain in the ass. I was a professional writer, I had two books under my belt, I had a weekly newsletter where I already gave free advice, so why would I want the headache of creating MORE free content for no money? But, as is my disposition, I took a chance, and, as is my disposition, I stuck with it.

9 years later, I am humbled and blown away at what this site has become. My little blog, which I half-heartedly started when I first met my wife (original title: AdviceFromASingleDatingExpert), has turned into a massive community. Nearly 9 million people came to EvanMarcKatz.com in 2015.

So I just want to say, from the bottom of my heart, how grateful I am. I began as a 34-year-old single writer, trying to navigate his way through the complicated LA dating scene. I didn’t know what I was doing, but that didn’t stop me. However, by hosting this blog, answering your questions, and participating in the vibrant comments section, I have become a better person. I’ve learned to understand different perspectives, challenge my own beliefs, inform my coaching practice, and, most importantly, choose an amazing wife. In short, I’ve grown up, thanks to you. I have a career, thanks to you. To some degree, I owe my life to you.

Which is why I would be remiss, after all this time, to keep these astounding numbers to myself. I wanted you to know that I appreciate your continued readership and that you are part of something much larger. Because of that, I vow to keep putting out regular provocative material (including a new podcast and YouTube channel in March) and to keep up my end of the bargain as long as you keep up yours.

With that in mind, I have one (okay, two) simple requests:

In the comments section beneath the infographic, please post the single most important thing you have gotten out of reading this blog. Then, when you’re done, please share this post on your Facebook wall or Twitter account. I’m proud of what we’ve built together and I hope we can continue to grow this worldwide community of smart people who believe in love.

Thank you so very much,

Love,

Evan

Friendly Reminder:

Please post the single most important thing you have gotten out of reading this blog.

Then, when you’re done, please share this post on your Facebook wall or Twitter account.

I’m proud of what we’ve built together and I hope we can continue to grow this worldwide community of smart people who believe in love.

Join our conversation (29 Comments).
Click Here To Leave Your Comment Below.

Comments:

  1. 1
    ScottH

    just one important thing?  that’ll be hard.

    1.  believe the negatives.  at least pay a damn lot of attention to them.

    2.  it’s not about getting my date to like me.  it’s about seeing if I like her and if we can have a mutually fulfilling relationship.  this means that not every person I meet will work out and that makes it a lot easier to be confident and relaxed.

    3.   understanding the different attachment styles and understanding that there are lots of wounded people walking around.

    4.  I love reading other people’s comments and seeing the varied perspectives, some of which I will never agree with.

    5.  (suggestion for blog)  how about having an open forum where people can post questions and other people can comment.  Kind of like the POF forums.

    how do you know the demographics of your readers?  how do you discern age and gender?

    1. 1.1
      Evan Marc Katz

      Thanks, ScottH. Google Analytics tells me everything about my readers (at least everything that Google knows). They skew younger than my clients, because they’re mostly one-off Googlers. I would love for twentysomethings to embrace this stuff, but, truth be told, they are often not ready for real relationships and don’t feel the pain of getting things wrong and the urgency of wanting to get them right.

      As for an open forum? That sounds like anarchy to me. I take a reader question every Monday, answer it, and we debate it in the comments section below. The only comments I delete are insults and other reader questions which hijack the commentary on the original post. Point is to keep things on track. So I’m not sure how this would be a better place if this were an open forum – or, candidly, how an open forum would benefit my business in any way. Sounds to me like it would require a lot of moderation and would produce a lower level of discourse. At least that’s my thinking.

      But I appreciate your suggestion and contribution and thank you for being a part of my community.

    2. 1.2
      ScotttH

      Also, be me with all of my idiosyncrasies and find someone who accepts and adores me as I am.  If she can’t do that, buh bye.

      Also, an asshole is a great person 80% of the time.  Likewise, a crazy woman is a great woman 80% of the time.  Pay attention to the 20%.  This is just an extension of pay attention to the negatives.

      Give lots of mulligans.  If they really care for you, they probably didn’t mean to hurt you.  Just clarify.  Also, expect mulligans from a caring partner.  If she’s secure, she’ll give them.  Just don’t need too many mulligans.

  2. 2
    Michelle L. LeBlanc

    Two main takeaways for me over the years since I met you. First, men are not complicated. All the complications were of my own invention, rooted in insecurity. Second, don’t have sex until you have a boyfriend. As much as I wanted to think I was, I’m simply not the kind of person who can have sex without emotional attachment, and I need and want the security of a relationship first. And, one bonus takeaway: have a clever user name for your dating profile. I recently helped a friend choose her first one. She bakes and she’s Jewish. We chose ChallahBackGirl.

     

     

    1. 2.2
      Christine

      “All the complications were of my own invention, rooted in insecurity”

      I love that sentence, that is so true.  I’ve had that issue as well.  It’s still a work in progress, but I have gotten better at not letting insecurity take over.

      Hey, if guys don’t respond to a clever user name like that, it’s their loss!  I wish I’d been that creative back when I was online dating!

  3. 3
    KC

    I started reading you in 2007, and have never ever missed one of your posts since then. You even chose me for a post! This was me:  https://www.evanmarckatz.com/blog/dating-tips-advice/why-would-a-man-assume-he-is-my-perfect-match/

    Now I know that I am one of your very first readers. Although we don’t know each other, I can honestly say that it feels like we’ve been friends since 2007. Thank you for everything.

    Things I’ve learned thanks to EMK:

    – Don’t overthink
    – If he doesn’t show much interest: next!
    – Online dating is great if done correctly
    – If I’m a great woman and I’m single, there must be a great man that is single as well
    – Not all men are players
    – Some people  know nothing about how it is to be single, they shouldn’t be listened to
    – Men have feelings
    – Love can happen to anyone
    – I shouldn’t be giving up on love
    – It’s much better to date a happy person than a dark one
    – First dates are for two things and two things only: did I have fun? Do I want to see him again? Period.
    – I’m not alone. Many good, kind and intelligent people haven’t found true love yet, and that doesn’t make us a bunch of losers (although some really stupid people may  think that we are a bunch of losers).

    There’s much more, but these are already the closest ones to my heart. Thank you for helping me reconnect to my feelings. Reading you makes me feel my heart “warm”, and that’s something that I’ve never told anyone.

  4. 4
    Jimmie

    I’m a regular reader who never comments. I found you as a began my online dating experience which surprisingly resulted in a wonderful, healthy relationship. (I expected to kiss a LOT of frogs, but I found Mr. Amazing almost right away.) Your advice continues to help me even though I’m not dating but am in a LTR.

    One thing!? Impossible.

    1. abundance mindset is critical — there are plenty of options out there

    2. believe what he does (not what he says)

    3. mirroring

    4. accept the way it (dating) is and work with it instead of complaining against it

  5. 5
    Amy G.

    I started listening to Why He Disappeared about 3 days after meeting my boyfriend. That was 3 1/2 years ago and we are still going strong. I’d say one of my biggest take-aways was to pay attention to his actions. He’s not a big talker when it comes to our relationship, but the little things he does have always shown me how he really feels. I knew he was for real when he started buying new furniture for his apartment that would accommodate all six of us (we have four kids between us). If that’s not love, I don’t know what is!

  6. 6
    Rosie

    Evan, you taught me a lot. I read why he disappears and it made so much sense. I also kept dating and have met a wonderful man and we are getting married in April. You are so commonsensical that most of the time when I read something from you, I can’t believe I didn’t know that!  I greatly appreciate all your foresight for women. We overthink things and it helps to get an objective perspective from you!!  Thanks

  7. 7
    Angel

    One thing??????? Evan, I can’t narrow it down that much, but I’ll try.

    I didn’t attract the wrong men, I accepted them. That was eye opening for me.

    I also always remember that I should believe the negatives and ignore the positives, that I should do nothing and that I’m fine being a kind, loving, and giving woman, I just have to find a man who appreciates that instead of trying to adapt my personality to men who don’t.

    Thank you so much for your generosity, your wit, and your honest desire to help us women to get it right in this thorny search for true love.

    This sounds very teenage like, but what the heck: I love you! Keep it up!

    I’m glad to be part of this and to have learned so much in the practical aspects of dating.

    Hugs to you and your family.

    May the blessings keep pouring.

  8. 8
    Laura J.

    I have learned so much in the two plus years I have been following you.  But the most important is to be the CEO of my love life.  I love that phrase and it really helps me remember that I have control over whether I accept bad behavior from men.  And it helps me remember that I should be the chooser not the choosee, so to speak.  Thanks Evan!!

  9. 9
    Tre

    That a good relationship does not require work.  Too bad I didn’t know this 30 years ago.  Even though I am retired from dating this has helped relieved any guilt I had over choosing not to work on past relationships.

  10. 10
    Henriette

    Well done, Evan. I know these successes are the result of much hard work.

    Most important lesson I learned: Women should look for men of fine character, first and foremost, while guys should screen out crazy/ diva/ drama and work backwards from there.

  11. 11
    Amy M

    The single most important thing I’ve gotten from your blog has been confirmation for things that I already–that I deserve to be treated well, that there are plenty of good men out there, that if I stayed positive and open and patient I would eventually meet someone amazing who loves me as much as I love him. Well, I did indeed meet a great guy. He was a good friend first, which in my opinion is a major bonus. I’ve already shared my news with you Evan, but I want to share it again here to give hope to others–we’re getting married this summer!

    1. 11.1
      Amy M

      Oops, I meant to write “..things that I already knew”.

  12. 12
    Noemi

    1. Don’t sweat the small stuff, and don’t tolerate the big stuff

    2. So, he wants sex so soon. It doesn’t make him a bad guy. It just proves he is, indeed, male.

    3. Believe the negatives.

    4. A**holes are nice 80 percent of the time.

  13. 13
    Malika

    The most important lesson: if you find his behaviour unacceptable, leave. The lesson that made me cry: you don’t attract bad men, you accept them.

    This blog has been my daily fix for the past year. It has helped me move forward from a broken heart and date men who show via their actions that they are good and appreciative men. I wish I could say i’d met a man i would want to settle down with, but I can say your words have contributed to keeping my sanity and calm in the dating world. Can’t wait for the new content!

  14. 14
    KARON

    Evan, I have learned so much from you through the years.  So wish that I had found your site before I started dating online.  However, once I read your book “Why He Disappeared”, online dating became so much easier to navigate which led to understanding men a lot better!  Listened to your advice about not looking for that attractive, tall and dynamic man that every woman wanted and gave another look at a very warm, understanding, not so tall man  who always calls, brings me flowers and plans all types of wonderful dates.   Evan, you are an outstanding coach!

  15. 15
    Roseveail

    To be picky about the ‘right’ qualities and values , to give a chance to the one who was smitten with me lol and be stringently governed by my perceived list of must haves attributes.  This is my first time writing, I am 57 and just recently divorced ( was married for 28 yrs ) I read your blog with great interest and have applied many of your sound logical advice to my life in general.  Thank you, I have met a wonderful man, have been dating for nearly a year, he has faithfully and consistently loved and adored me from the beginning and I am so greatful I gave him a chance, that is a direct result of listening to your advice re giving love a chance.

  16. 16
    Elly Klein

    “new podcast and YouTube channel in March”

    Ooh! Exciting! Can never get enough Evan – even as a Love U 2015 graduate. 🙂

    Will definitely post on both my professional and personal Facebook pages.

    Forever shouting you from the rooftops,

    Elly

  17. 17
    SMC

    I’m a new fan, only discovered you a couple of months ago, but you already know how appreciative I am of your advice.  I found you when my man started to grow distant, only to discover I’d been doing just about everything completely wrong, but your advice has turned all that around.  Some of the biggest takeaways for me have been a) to BE and let the man DO and that men love and prefer doing for women rather than having women do for them (who knew I was over functioning to the nth degree!); b) that I didn’t choose the wrong men, I accepted them; c) to look at his behavior between dates; d) to accept men exactly the way they are without trying to change them.  This is especially important as I notice my flaws in the mirror each morning and know that he looks past them to the inner me.  It enables me to ignore his flaws as well and focus on the wonderful man that he is.

    There are so many more nuggets of wisdom.  Why He Disappeared is a goldmine of information that I’ve listened to twice and will listen to again.  And I know if I should find myself single again that, even at my age, I’ll have a plethora of possibilities out there because I’ll be armed with the wisdom you’ve so generously shared here and in your Love U classes.  Thanks, Evan!

  18. 18
    Adrian

    Wow! Just one thing would be too hard Evan.

    I would say the 2 biggest are:

    1. The secret to a happy and successful relationship… find a person who sees all your flaws and still desires you.

    2. Being successful with dating is not about doing what feels good, right, or fair, but about doing what Works!

    From your site I have learned what I need to do to be considered a good man but strong man, how I should treat a woman to make her happy, and also how a good woman should treat me. The behavior I should and should not except from women.

    Finally, I have to admit that though I learned much from you Evan, at least 90% of my “aha” moments have been from the comments section. Your replies to people or just other commenters making giving great insight.

  19. 19
    Ms MC

    I don’t usually post comments, here or anywhere, but I’m a very regular reader, so the least I can do in return for all this brilliant material is to provide some feedback. (I did buy your excellent “Why He Disappeared”). I’m a 40-something single mum who still believes in finding love.

    Evan, I love your blog. The main reason I’m here: you’re a brilliant writer who seems to have found his natural medium. Your articles cut straight to the chase, they’re funny and entertaining, and your personality and passion shine through. Your opinions are rooted in real life and contain 0% platitudes or blandness. That’s my kind of reading material.
    I had to work out a lot of this relationship stuff out on my own, the long and hard way. By the time I came across your blog I found that much of what you write chimes with the way I’m going about my search for a long-term relationship. What I have found so useful is how your writing crystallises my thoughts, and most importantly, keeps me on track!
    I’ve been an avid reader in the past few months, particularly during a three-month relationship. We were exclusive, but he wasn’t my boyfriend. I knew I had to end it, which was damn hard as there were many positives.
    Your writing really helped me focus on deciding how long I was going to give the relationship, and then how to move on as cleanly as possible. The final conversation was positive and respectful on both sides. You have helped me stay in the right mindset, while providing valuable insights from the male perspective.
    And… I have just met someone new, I already know he wants me to be his girlfriend, so all I need to do now is enjoy the process of getting to know him better, and see what happens, while having fun! And keep reading your blog, of course. Thank you.

  20. 20
    Tanya K

    Evan,

    Congratulations! I signed up for lots of things during my single days. This blog has by far been the best thing that has ever happened to me. I am currently in a very loving relationship, but still love reading it!

    The single most important piece of information from your blog was related to the endless lists of wants and don’t wants we have when reviewing potential dates. You’ve written a couple of blogs about this topic, but at the time it was the one related to your wife that opened my eyes. I know you’ve mentioned in the past she would’ve never come up on your search in Match.

    I like many others had absolute ‘no’s’ when considering a potential date. One of those was, I would never date an ‘atheist’. I remember coming across a profile of someone that in every other category seemed to be a good fit, but he listed that darn ‘atheist’ word. Luckily, I came across him shortly after I read your blog related to these exclusions. I decided to give him a chance and over a year later we’re talking about getting engaged. It ends up he’s the kindest man I’ve ever met in my life among many other things. If it weren’t for your blog, I would’ve passed him up.

    Thank you for what you do!

     

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