I don’t speak for all men. But I try to speak for the most desirable ones: smart, successful, confident, driven, honest, experienced, sensitive, and marriage-oriented. If you want to be in a relationship with a man like that, please read every single post below to get a better sense of how we think. Knowledge is power.
Please don’t do this. I agree with you in principle, as I wrote above. That doesn’t mean you should advertise it. “Moving slowly” or “Friends first” is easily read as “I’m fearful. I have issues with trust and sex. You won’t get laid for at least a few months.” You can move slow, but don’t take away the thrill of the chase by explaining this in your profile.
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That describes my marriage entirely. My wife had the same job for 16 years and loved it. Then she got pregnant. She asked for a 3-month maternity leave. Then she asked for a 3-month extension. Then she told her boss she was going on “Eternity Leave.”
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First is how much you trust him as a man, a human being, and your future husband. If you believe in him because he did the right thing three years ago, I don’t think it’s a terrible idea to loosen the rules a little bit. If it becomes a problem, you always have the right to walk away from the relationship…
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Honestly, if either of the two genders was looking for a partner to “have it all,” couldn’t we agree that it’s women? Contrast that with my job, talking to women every day for 16 years and you’ll quickly realize that these cute, nice and accepting won’t get you anywhere with my clients.
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That’s like 40% of the readers of Golf Digest NOT playing golf. You don’t get better at golf by just reading about it; at a certain point, you have to pick up a club.
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You can make all the excuses in the world for him – what a great man he is – how charming, fun, and energetic – but that is just to ignore his big design flaw: he’s a shitty partner.
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Yes, masculine is about doing and feminine is about receiving, and masculine men prefer women who receive their advances. But neither men nor women are so monolithic that you have to live in fear of reaching out to a guy.
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But that doesn’t mean you’re a bad person. It means you’re human. It means you wanted to be ready but weren’t really ready. It means you were sensitive enough to call attention to it after two months instead of letting it go on for two years before pulling the plug.
Read More… 32 commentsSex appeal doesn’t mean laying on a bed in lingerie with a rose in your teeth. It just means posting photos that appeal to men’s basest impulses. If he clicks on your profile and is turned on, a good man will then read about you and write based on your content rather than your looks.
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We do our sons no favors when we tell them that they don’t have to answer that voice inside them that tells them to be strong, to be brave, and to lead.
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You always did tell it like it is. I have to say thank you for believing in me, and giving me confidence I didn’t know I had. Thank you for seeing that there was something to be seen in me, that I didn’t even know existed.
Here's the deal. I read your blog - I devour your newsletters. I've learned so much about men (and myself) through the process.
Thanks to Evan, I finally feel like I'm exactly where I want to be in life. The future is wide open and bright, and I found a rare gem to cherish. I thank Evan for his advice and insight, his reading recommendations, and his encouragement through this process!
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