Are All Women Crazy? Are All Men Obsessed With Sex?

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Dear Evan,

Why are most men the same man… just in different vessels?

Kami

This question was sent to me by a friend as a joke, which is exactly why I’m printing it here.

There is that perception that “men” are one way, and “women” are another. Most people focus almost exclusively on these stereotypes and find evidence to support them.

So, if we listen to conventional wisdom, what do we know about men? Well…

Men are liars
Men are fools
Men are dangerous
Men are idiots
Men are pigs

You know how I got these nuggets of wisdom about men?

Google. IMDB. Amazon.

Look around. You’ll see.

These are concepts — book titles, even – that only go to reinforce our basest stereotypes. And the danger of stereotypes is not that they’re false — but rather in believing that they’re always true.

And if such stereotypes are to be roundly believed, what do they tell us about men?

Men cannot be trusted.
Men are lazy and can’t multi-task
Men are prone to violence
Men are likely to be unfaithful
Men don’t have feelings and don’t express themselves
Men want sex all the time
Men treat women poorly

If you’re a woman, you have probably met a man who was an uncommunicative, sex-obsessed liar.

But I’m wondering if you’ve ever met a man who:

Treated you extremely well
Consistently told you how he felt
Wasn’t as into sex as you were
Never cheated on you
Kept his word when he made a promise
Led a balanced life with work, friends, and cultural interests

I’m guessing you have.

And let’s not forget women’s stereotypes, also found in Google:

Women are evil…
Women are stupid
Women are angry
Women are talkative
Women are crazy
Women are overly sensitive

Right off the bat, I would say that my girlfriend disproves all of these things — except for the talkative one.

Then again, the New York Times just reported this nugget from Science Magazine, which observes that men and women are equally talkative.

The point isn’t that men aren’t into sex or that women aren’t emotional. Many are. Instead, it’s that when you’re dating, you should be dealing with individuals, not stereotypes.

And unless you want to be grouped together with all the others who embody the worst of your gender, you may want to stop treating the opposite sex as a monolithic series of tired clichés.

Join our conversation (51 Comments).
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Comments:

  1. 21
    hunter

    …everything JoJo said,  belongs in  bold letters, underlined twice!!…Bravo!!..Bravo!!..

  2. 22
    I'm a girl

    Hey, I thought everyone loved sex??? Is there someone out there who doesn’t?  I believe that we are all way too hard on each other. Chill out you meanies!!! LOL

  3. 23
    I'm a girl

    Hey, I thought everyone loved sex??? Is there someone out there who doesn’t?  I believe that we are all way too hard on each other. Chill out you meanies!!! LOL

  4. 24
    hunter

    Hi..I’m a girl,
    try the lifestyles site, you don’t want to say that around here…hhhmmh..how funny!!

  5. 25
    I'm a girl

    Hi back,
    Is hunter you name or your M.O. ? LOL I’m asking in a loving way, just curious  
    I’m not dense on purpose, but, What is the lifestyles site?  

  6. 26
    I'm a girl

    Hi back,
    Is hunter you name or your M.O. ? LOL I’m asking in a loving way, just curious  
    I’m not dense on purpose, but, What is the lifestyles site?  

    1. 26.1
      hunter

      …I meant alternative lifestyles….

  7. 27
    Despicable Douchebag

    I am a girl and men hate me. Dunno why? Oh wait I do.
    It’s cuz i’m not a slut and I don’t act and dress like a hooker.  

  8. 28
    Karl R

    Despicable Douchebag,
    You’re fooling yourself. That’s not what men hate about you.
      
    My wife doesn’t dress like a hooker. My wife enjoys sex, but she has never been into casual sex or having multiple sex partners. I would bet that Evan’s wife is the same.
      
    It might make you feel better to claim that’s why men don’t like you, but you’re just lying to yourself. It has to be something else.
      
    If you hate sex, that’s going to cause most men (the ones who like sex) to seek out partners who are more compatible. If you call people who have normal sex drives “sluts”, that will cause people to dislike you … for being a judgmental ass.
      
    Despicable Douchebag,
    If I had to take a guess at your problem, I suspect that I don’t need to look any further than the name you have chosen for yourself. It’s your personality that’s turning people off. Furthermore, I suspect that you’re aware of that to some degree.

    1. 28.1
      Rani

      Karl R – You are so on point, and you delivered it with compassion :-)! I’m a single lady who does not dress like a hooker, and who is certainly not a slut. I have a very healthy sex drive which is for a committed relationship only. I can’t say that men hate me for that or at all! Her name said it all, didn’t it, my darling?

  9. 29
    Jaded

    There are some men that say “Women are bitter, women are mental, women are obsessed”
    They never ask why. They don’t seem to want to change this.
    But they read sites like this  
    http://m.wikihow.com/Make-a-Girl-Become-Obsessed-with-You

    ‘Men’ are not obsessed with sex, but males with a mental age of 14 often are. And they seek out immature or vulnerable girls to increase their chances of pulling and then complain about how crazy they are.

    It’s all immature dramas.  

    Grown ups of either gender do not fall into any of the made up stereotypes mentioned in the article.

    Also I’m a little beyond bored of random blokes in the street telling me how ‘you women are all the same with your handbags’ or ‘you women are all obsessed with shopping’ and then flirting with me, afterwards, badly.  
    My apparent obsession with handbags and shopping ( actually not that type of girl) is not the reason I don’t want to date you. You are the reason I don’t want to date you. And if I should derive a greater sense of satisfaction from buying a handbag than talking to you,   what does this tell you? There is no woman in the world who would not give up all her handbags for a good man.

      

  10. 30
    Seriously

    Well most of the ones that are out there today, no doubt about that.

  11. 31
    hunter

    ..I don’t think women are bitter, mental, off whatever other descriptions we sometimes use…it us men, our minds are limited by logic…..

  12. 32
    Shandy

    Stereotypes exist b/c they’re are true, people need to learn to accept that.

    Women seem crazy b/c really they are miserable, men render them miserable with their callous, sex obsessed behavior. Get that through your head b/c it. Is. True.

  13. 33
    Lisa Johnson

    Men are pretty much the same in different vessels! So are women! People are more the same then not same, but as for the “myths”….I think both sets of myths apply to both sexes!

  14. 34
    john

    well some are crazy i guess .not all of them i know a women thats really

    sweet and   i know shes in love with me. i get the best treatment any one could get when i go to do cover work where she is a manager this shows

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