I’ve got a great story that I want to share with you today.
Even though I bill myself as a dating coach for “smart, strong, successful women”, I still maintain a few male clients.
I enjoy working with guys because, when they’re motivated, they’re hardworking and highly coachable. Plus, the men who gravitate towards me are usually “nice guys” who just need a little bit of an edge to succeed wildly with women.
In other words, most of my men are the one you should be dating in real life – the kind that are open to learning and growth and are willing to spend thousands of dollars to learn how to better connect with women.
The guy who called me today is completely different – and I had such an interesting phone call with him that I wanted to share it with you.
“James” tells me that he’s 30 years old, living in Seattle, working in IT. He sounds like a bright guy. A little angry, perhaps, but I’m used to getting clients who aren’t too happy with the fact that they’re reaching out to a dating coach.
James tells me that after focusing on his career for most of his 20’s, he’s been dating intently for the past year.
And it’s been TERRIBLE.
There isn’t a woman in the world who’d enjoy going out with a man who believes that ALL women are fickle and unfair.
It seems that whenever he goes out with women, they’re all so SHALLOW.
They never want to TAKE THE TIME to get to know him as a human being.
They’re all looking for magical CHEMISTRY and trying to figure out within 5 minutes whether he’s their SOULMATE.
The women he wants IGNORE him online, DON’T RETURN his calls after dates, and generally seem to want the PERFECT man.
As a result, James HATES dating.
Now, between you and me, it doesn’t take a dating coach to diagnose what ails James. There isn’t a woman in the world who’d enjoy going out with a man who believes that ALL women are fickle and unfair.
Still, I sympathized with James on the phone. After all, this IS his dating experience. It’s real, not imagined. And it’s normal to feel frustration when you can’t solve a problem.
I asked James what he thought that I could do for him. He mumbled something about helping him meet women who were different than the women he’s been dating.
I couldn’t hold back any longer.