Nowhere is this more apparent than the dating arena.
I meet single people every day who talk about their refusal to settle – without realizing that someone, in some capacity, has to settle on them.
For years, I coasted on the fact that I was kind, intelligent, funny and ambitious. Focusing solely on my good traits – and sweeping my bad traits under the rug – allowed me to dissect each and every woman who crossed my path. I could pass her up because she’s a workaholic, because she’s a few years older, because she’s got a few extra pounds, because she’s sarcastic. Yet I rarely put any time into thinking how she put up with a guy who is moody, neurotic, high-maintenance, and somewhat negative.
This realization – this tearing down of ego – was the big step that opened me up to my relationship with my wife. I started to appreciate the idea that, despite my good qualities, there was a whole lot of forgiving one had to do to be my partner.
And I would intimate that if you consider what someone else is sacrificing to be with you – whether you’re asking them to concede on height, weight, age, income, health, temperament, personality, etc – you will be a lot more forgiving of others in the future.