You may think dating is a dirty word. Not when you do it my way. If you’ve ever struggled with attracting the “right” guys, getting second dates, or turning a hook-up into a boyfriend, my blog posts on dating will show you how to stop making the mistakes that have plagued you for your whole life.
I agree that our chemistry and connection was amazing. I want sex too but I just don’t want men to want me just for sex. What can I do to either change that thought or change the guy?
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It took me awhile but I finally outgrew the desire for butterflies – probably when I realized that butterflies had never been a good predictor of my future.
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We see a lot of this in the comments section – people so committed to the worldview that has led them to being single and unhappy – that when this blog challenges them, the only thing they can do is lash out at a guy who gives free dating advice on the internet.
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I have college friends who aren’t on there while their wives are. What does that say about their relationship? Nothing. There’s more in the article about algorithms that can predict your future, but here’s the reason I don’t believe in them: humans can’t predict their future.
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Of course, you’re going to have chemistry, romance, physical connection with a guy – that’s exactly what STARTS pretty much every relationship. But you’re playing the long game here – trying to find a lifetime partner, presumably – and your decision-making criteria has to change when you’re considering a future.
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I’m not interested in game-playing, refusing to return men’s calls, running late to keep him guessing or any such B.S. But from all my experience, I have yet to see much compelling evidence that pursuing a man the way women often like to be pursued is an effective strategy.
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There is nothing you could tell me about him or your relationship that would change my feeling. You can tell me he buys you flowers, rubs your feet, and cures cancer on the side. Doesn’t matter. He’s an avoidant timebomb waiting to explode.
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Finally, I’ll remind you that a camera only capture what’s actually there. Which is to say that if you look good in a photo, you look exactly that way in real life. Please don’t continue to believe false and negative things about your own looks; it’s disempowering. You may be the cute cheerleader’s friend, but guess what? Guys find her attractive, too!
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Without anger, judgment, or attachment to the outcome, let him know you want to have a household meeting to go through your respective earnings and expenses. Anything you have left over, you can keep in your own bank account and spend according to your own desires.
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The first iPhone would be released later that year. Texting was around but it wasn’t ubiquitous. Same with Facebook. Instagram came around in 2010. Tinder didn’t launch until 2012. And here we are, as lonely and disconnected as ever. Social media sites that were designed to connect us now cause an equal amount of pain and confusion.
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Here's the deal. I read your blog - I devour your newsletters. I've learned so much about men (and myself) through the process.
To make a long story short, I am so happy because I met Mr. Right. He possessed the 3 important requirements that fit my need: chemistry, compatibility, and emotionally and physically attraction. We are committed and our relationship is going on strong for three years now.
I learned from you something revelatory: men want to make women happy. Sometimes they don’t know how to do that, but my boyfriend really wants to make me happy…
If you’re looking to answer your most pressing dating and relationship question, my blog is like Google for your love life!
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